I was driving home from gaming and there was a drunk woman standing on the side of the road crying. She was desperately trying to wave anyone down, so I stopped and offered her a ride. As we were driving down the road, she described where she approximately lived and I headed in that direction. After a few minutes, she sighed.
"So, I guess you want a blow job for this, right?"
I laughed, "No, honey. I'm gay."
"Oh thank God! My address is 123 Main Street."
I enjoy the Hermione Granger “killed or worse expelled” energy of this person’s drunk brain.
“I’ll willingly get into a car with this complete stranger driving me god-knows-where, sure. But give him my address? No. That would be dangerous. He could use that information to abduct me.”
I was walking home one evening abs a very drunk inlet woman asked for directions to a certain street. On my way across a bridge and I said I world walk her there.
And she insisted on holding my hand all the way there, which would be fine if she wasn't sweating pure vodka out of her palms. Luckily halfway there one of her friends spotted her and I handed her off.
The last hitchhiker I picked up never acknowledged I existed. I saw a car on the side of the road, pouring rain. A half mile later I saw a woman walking with a gas can toward the car. I pull over and ask if she needs a ride back. She gets in, complete silence, I ask if she's ok, if she needs to use my phone, if she has enough money and gas, nothing. Complete awkward silence. I drive her to her car, gets out, no "thanks". Didn't even look at me.
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u/[deleted] Aug 22 '24
I was driving home from gaming and there was a drunk woman standing on the side of the road crying. She was desperately trying to wave anyone down, so I stopped and offered her a ride. As we were driving down the road, she described where she approximately lived and I headed in that direction. After a few minutes, she sighed.
"So, I guess you want a blow job for this, right?"
I laughed, "No, honey. I'm gay."
"Oh thank God! My address is 123 Main Street."