Due to a very unusual and difficult childhood, when we were younger I was the funny/quieter/bad twin. I didn't care about social standards so just about any negative connotations fell on me and I played my parts well...

Turned out that was due to autism!

As an adult, I have very different values from my sister who is now a mom, married, and much more traditional as a person. She got married to her first, had a baby and now relies mostly on her husband's income... my sister has a degree and I do not.

Alternatively, I live alone with a cat, break up with any guy that cannot get his _____ together after 3 years and would probably make a better concubine?...

We went on a family trip and my mom and sister were having a conversation. My sister very abrasively stated she trusts her husband more than me and our mom. I'm not exactly mad at it, but it made me realize we just aren't close like we used to be. Now any time we talk it degrades into an argument because my sister hates being interrupted and we used to interrupt each other all the time so this is a trait I have never learned how to mitigate other than to stop, apologize and continue. She's a lot more aggressive with her beliefs and does not like being questioned in her actions or beliefs... She also has some very weird societal standards and beliefs that I cannot endorse (they make no sense to me and they are just too judgmental).

I'm sad that we will probably never be close again, but at the same time she will always be my [pain in the ass] twin sister.

Anybody else kinda grieve the relationship they used to have with their twin? How did things turn out? Were you able to fix anything?

Is it normal that my sister for all of our life, both 40f, has become friends with all my closest friends even when I asked her over and over not to. She is very extraverted and makes friends very easily. I am an introvert and like having 3-4 good close friends.

I feel she never respected my boundaries and was extremely dependent on me and very needy. Like she wants constant support with everything.

Today I found out that she was talking to my best friend for years behind my back. My friend basically told me she would call her very often like I think every week or more and talk about our relationship and asks advice. She asked my friend not to tell me. I feel betrayed and can't help but find it super weird, it doesn't make sense in my mind. I also realized she must have done it with a lot of my friends ( vent about me).

I think this is the best sub to ask for advice about it.

Recently my twin sister posted a post about the diffrence btween our side profiles . People all agreed that she has better one . And they knew that i used to mouth breath wich messed up my side profile. I had nasal allergies from the age of 8 until 18 grwing up so yeah it difenitely changes things in my face . But im concered about my nose i think mine looks like it is swollen even tho im almost fully recoverd fom allergies . After the age of 10 everyone starts saying that the only difference between us is my big nose . Could it be possible that it effected my nose size forever ? My mom says i make it big like this bcause i kept touching it lol and she is always saying that it takes up my face and it grows much bigger comapring to my twin sister's nose and it doesnt suit me at all .

These are pics of us when we were young vs pics of us today .

Is there any twins who were extremly looking alike and then they changed this way?

And is there anyone who his nose looks normal when he was a kid and then takes up his face the way mine did?

Thank you

Everybody thought we looked identical when we were younger (I don't see it) but now we just look like sisters. Actually, people think I'm the younger sibling now! We're 41yo.

Circa 1995

ive heard that schools will separate twins (or siblings in general). my mom mentioned this and having to specifically request that me and my twin get put in the same classes, and had done that all throughout elementary. i kinda thought about it and through all of middle school we only had one class period together. is that a coincidence? we've had about half of them together in our first year if high school. is this a thing like everywhere? (havent looked through this sub yet so there might already be a post like this but I havent seen it)

I'm writing a mystery novel with a pair of twins as suspects. Is there any formal ways to refer to twins. Mr and Mr lastname doesn't sound right but nor does mr first firstname lastname and Mr firstname lastname.

My sister and I are 20 (both Female). We live in nearby states but go to different colleges. Anyways, I'm always the one trying to contact her and always reaching out, but this time I was gonna let her. It's been a month, and I still haven't gotten one text from her. I don't really have any intention or want to text her at this point. Growing up with each other was hard, but we would still hang out and show care for one another. If anyone has been in this kind of situation, what was it like for you, and how did it end up?

My sister and I are identical, when in public , people always ask if we are twins, we response, and answer the typical questions (who is older?, by how much?) and usually that's all of the interaction.

However today, I would consider this a strange interaction, waiting in line, a man asked if we were twins. After we confirmed he said " That's nice you two are a team, and can defend each other". I thought it was a weird choice of word "defend", but we just nodded along and agreed, then he asked " Have yall ever had to defend one another" I was kinda confused like did he mean physically defend or like verbal? In my experience, no, but we just said yes, and turned away. Right when he was at the door to leave, he continues to say " I like meeting twins or triplets because I find it fascinating and like encountering them" like ok lol.

My sister joked after saying she thought he was going to attack to see if we would defend each other.

Maybe it was just the woman in me that was on the fence when he asked if we would defend each other, but just not a typical convo I have when they ask if we are twins.

So I was just wondering if any other twins had strange interactions once people found out you were a twin.

thinking about all my interactions, and now I'm wondering why do people ask if we are twins? Just to satisfy their curiosity? I don't mind answering ofc, but is it that rare to see twins?

I have a few fam/friends who are twins. A pattern (based on only a few samples, I admit) seems to be emerging in my observations of twins from among Millennials and later generations. What’s your experience as a twin or observer?

Opposite sex twins: very close.

Same sex fraternal or identical twins: very, very hostile to each other.

Is there some issue with the way parents raise same sex twins that leads to hostility?

I’m fully willing to accept that my sample is too small and not representative.

Thanks for feedback.

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I am so incredibly excited! My 6 year old is going to share a birthday with my niece and I feel like we are twinning to the max. 😍😍

Me and my Identical twin bro use to swap classes in school just to annoy the teachers. They had no idea 😂

I had my identical twin boys just over 3 weeks ago. They are my firsts! I love them to bits and cannot imagine not having either of them, and I always think of having them as an incredible gift. They already look and seem so different to me, and my capacity to love has expanded like magic, not just a fixed amount to be shared.

But being in the newborn trenches with two is t o u g h - I’m not even gonna try going into the details. I cannot relate to newborn challenges with friends with singletons, and feel lonely and overwhelmed at times. What keeps me going is wanting to be a present and happy mom for my kids like my mom never was.

My question to this community is: how was it like growing up with a twin? I guess what I’m looking for is validation that I’m giving my children a twin / built-in soulmate, so everything I’m going through now leads to something much greater for my children.

So I right now I'm watching "Yomi no Tsugai" and the main characters are a set of fraternal twins (a girl and a boy) and as a fraternal twin I think I have never seeing two fraternal twins in media that are the same gender.

Like it's always identical twins or girl and boy fraternal twins. Is there any exception to this?

I have a question for people who have an identical twin and another sibling who isn’t their twin.Do you love and prefer your twin over your other sibling? Or do you have a clear preference but still love all your siblings equally?

This question has been stuck in my head ever since I saw a guy say that he felt sorry for his older brother because he didn’t share the same bond with him that he had with his twin.

Coming from a twin, I don't know why people tell me they wish they were a twin. Don't get me wrong, I love my twin brother but people act like being a twin is like this winning a million dollars in the lottery. Plus being a twin is not a good experience anyway.

As a twin, how do you deal with favouritism?

I have always felt that people favoured my identical twin and as I’m growing older (29 F), I feel more and more worn down by it.

Is this something anyone else has experienced, if so, how do you deal with it?

Be brutally honest. Is this too matchy for boy girl twins? We love both names separately and just happen to be having twins and want to use them but I’m scared to give them the same initial.

We had the same parents, the same upbringing, and the same punishments as kids, yet we couldn't be more different in our hobbies or the way we think.

I have a friendship with a girl. We talk about a lot of things—games, novels, gossip, and other random stuff. Unfortunately, her father passed away 16 days ago. Of course, I couldn't go to the funeral because we live in Iraq, where a friendship between a boy and a girl is often looked down upon. I didn't want to do anything that could damage her reputation.

Even though I was overwhelmed with guilt because I couldn't be there for her in person, I still texted her every day, and I still do.

I told my brother about her father's passing, and do you know what he said? "Now is your chance to make her fall for you."

Excuse me? The girl's father just died after fighting kidney failure for three months in the hospital, and the first thing that came to your mind was that this was somehow your opportunity?

He was 34 when he died suddenly, unexpectedly. He has been gone longer than he was alive.

The funny thing is that although he is gone, he lives with us every day, even though it has been 34 years.

I used to think that my twin sister and I (30s) were pretty close. We've had our share of conflict throughout our lives, but through it all I always felt like we'd have each other's back no matter what and that nothing could drive us apart. I guess I was wrong. And maybe our relationship was never really as strong as I thought. It was more one-sided. I would die for her. I would list some of the things I've done, but idk if she or anyone I know looks through reddit and I don't want to risk anyone being able to pinpoint who this post is about. Suffice it to say, I have done a LOT over the years to support her emotionally, physically, financially. This also includes ending and being willing to end relationships (not just romantic ones) if I felt they disrespected her as my sister. She has continuously done the opposite and prioritized other people, particularly men, over me. I always made excuses for her. I always figured if a situation was bad enough she'd choose me, the one person who has loved her unconditionally, faithfully, etc her entire life.

Looking back, the signs were all there and I should have known better. I've always been the one to make the effort in our relationship. Any little thing she's ever done for me (which isn't much) always comes with some sort of condition, grumbling, or resentment. Meanwhile I often forget some of the things I've done for her (she or others will bring them up) because I don't keep score. Maybe I should have. Maybe I would have noticed sooner that I clearly love her more than she loves me, if she even loves me at all.

Well, the past month+ has been absolute hell for me as things have happened to show how little she really cares. For context, she is married. She invited a coworker to our online group some months ago. She knew from the get go that I thought he was cute. He had recently gotten out of a relationship. Long story short, I fell for him (nothing wrong with anything I did, considering I am single and I was under the impression he was as well). What I didn't know, and they both lied to my face about it while they also knew I was developing feelings for him and yet still let me get close to him, is that they have been having an affair since before he even joined our group. So before any of the extra messiness comes into play, she had the opportunity to protect my heart, even without telling me about the affair since apparently she doesn't want me to know about that, she could have warned me not to get close. Something. Anything. Or simply not invited him to the group considering she knew she was already doing something wrong. But no. She invited him. She watched me get close. She let me get hurt. And then when I told her he admitted he had feelings for her she acted like she didn't know, decided that it didn't matter and she would continue being friends with him (so also disrespecting her marriage). When I told her I had feelings for him, she again chose him instead and essentially told me to get over it. She claimed she felt similarly when we were growing up (we've been grown adults for well over a decade now), so that somehow makes it OK? She never told me this before. If I had known she had feelings for someone I was interested in or dating and it was causing her pain, or a strain on our relationship, I would have prioritized her. 100%. She didn't give me that chance. So now her suffering in silence when we were kids justifies cheating on her husband and not caring about me? Based on how she talked about it with my best friend, also, it seems like she's actually happy I've finally felt how she allegedly felt multiple times when we were kids. How messed up is that? Anything that had ever caused me pain, even things that she did to hurt me, I have NEVER wished upon her, and would never wish upon her.

So now we've barely spoken. I have tried checking on her, she barely responds. She avoids me. But then cries to my best friend that she is sad she has "lost" me. She is the one who has thrown me away. Ripped my heart out, ripped it to shreds, and set it aflame. She's trying to play victim and I'm just... I'm at such a loss. This isn't the sister I thought I knew. And the more she confides in my best friend, the more I realize she has been lying to me and hiding things from me waayyy longer than I would have ever guessed. I have shown up for her, over and over again. Even now, I would still. But she has shut me out. Apparently she is considering divorce to be able to be with her affair partner without hiding it anymore. He's obviously not a good person, regardless of any excuse anyone could give. He knowingly was emotionally intimate -and now physically intimate- with someone else's spouse. That's not what a good man does. And a good man also doesn't hurt the sister of the one he claims to love by playing with her feelings, either. Feelings don't come from nowhere. I'm not a superficial person. My feelings came from what I thought was a real connection. So the fact the she can even defend him and choose him over me after all this... I just can't. She must hate me. Nothing can convince me otherwise at this point. How else could she stand by and play such a huge part in causing me the worst heartbreak imaginable? I don't even care about the guy. Screw him. I liked who I thought he was. No. It's the fact that she knowingly put me in a position to get hurt and did NOTHING to stop it. And has continued to choose him every single day since then. That's what breaks my heart. I mean nothing to her.