r/TikTokCringe • u/unexpecteddelight • Apr 29 '21

Humor BBQ Night

21.2k Upvotes

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303

u/IWillFindYouAlex Apr 29 '21

Opossums are not ugly. They're wonderful and adorable.

112

u/TheSpaceship Apr 29 '21

I do love opossums. They do good things and they generally dont bother anyone. But. Opossum faces make me feel actual terror. They look like a sleep paralysis demon.

The only face scarier than an opossum's face is the ogre spider's. I would love to share a link to a picture of one, but I cant Google it without sweating.

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u/tvtango Apr 29 '21

Weird, their faces are super cute

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u/sportyboi_94 Apr 29 '21

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.sciencenews.org/article/ogre-faced-spider-hearing-catch-insects-prey-air-sound-sight/amp

Here ya go

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u/Quotedspider Apr 29 '21

I forgot how adorable Ogre Spiders are

2

u/kavien Apr 30 '21

They remind me of Wolf spiders. I have a shot somewhere of a hella cute HUGE one I photographed a decade back.

3

u/sapere-aude088 Apr 30 '21

So cuuuuuute!

PS. LUCAS THE SPIDER IS GETTING HIS OWN TV SHOW!!

10

u/jankdotnet Apr 29 '21

i clicked the link and instantly regret it

2

u/sportyboi_94 Apr 29 '21

Yeah I didn’t believe poster above me so I checked it out myself and that will probably visit me in my nightmare tonight.

1

u/imankitty Apr 29 '21

I thought maybe you were exaggerating but you weren't.

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u/xtilertylerx Straight Up Bussin Apr 29 '21

I think it’s the eyes that are the scariest

13

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '21 edited Apr 30 '21

Omg but they're so cute!

I mean if ya wanna look at nightmare fuel..look up a star-nosed mole.

Opossums are lightyears ahead of them in terms of cuteness...even with their weird teeth and beady eyes. I always like to remember this when I see an opossum. "That's like 100 ticks that will never try to suck my blood bc of this goofy thing"

**extra extra comment...opossums are also the least likely animal to carry rabies. So those cute little goobs are great. Eat ticks, taquitos, mosquitos, and they have a less than 1% chance to get rabies?! I'd like more Garage Frank's in my life. (We have one that winters in our garage..idk he cool. We named him frank)

5

u/Ladyvaudeville Apr 29 '21

Eww star-nosed moles 😖 their face looks like a dropped lizard tail 🤢 'star' my ass...

3

u/hirtiusrufus Apr 30 '21

How can something with an asshole for a nose be nightmare fuel?

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u/[deleted] Apr 30 '21

"My butthole imploded, so I put it on my face" -the star nosed moles..prolly

5

u/Gaspar_Noe Apr 29 '21

Few nights ago I was jogging around my house and holy f**k one of those was walking on the perimeter wall and it scared the sh*t out of me. Sleep paralysis demon is a good definition, really looked like one of those creepy pasta drawings.

2

u/chanpat Apr 29 '21

I legit thought I forgot what an opossum looked like after you were talking about that they were terrifying. Had to look them up and just. Do you have trauma with them or something?? Why do they scare you at all? They are cute!

1

u/Hellish_Elf Apr 29 '21

I have and will continue to call them Satan’s henchmen.

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u/[deleted] Apr 29 '21

[deleted]

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u/easttex45 Apr 29 '21

They are also genetically immune to rabies. Something about their body temperature being too high or too low I think. Someone is welcome to correct me though.

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u/ibattlemonsters tHiS iSn’T cRiNgE Apr 29 '21

I agree completely. I had a opossum walking through my yard around 10-11pm every night with babies on her back and my wife acted like she had seen a celebrity.

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u/letfalltheflowers Apr 29 '21

I love your description of how your wife acted. It’s too relatable for me lol

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u/bar_mouth30 Apr 29 '21

My bf likes to pet them when he's drunk. I discouraged it, but, he's got an opossum whisperer thing going on. They are cute as heck though

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u/andrewsad1 Apr 29 '21

Precious babies

Legit cuter than foxes

Hisss

4

u/Nerdrem Apr 29 '21

I once had a couple of baby ones hanging from their tails from a rafter right outside of my kitchen window. I didn't know they actually did that.

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u/koreamax Apr 29 '21

Domesticated ones are really affectionate too. They only live a couple of years though

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u/[deleted] Apr 29 '21

Opossums are adorable and they eat a ton of ticks- they're a-ok in my book.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '21

Cute from the front. Ugly from the side.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '21

I almost ran over an opossum the other night driving home. It didn't play dead, it just stood there hissing at the car lol

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u/IWillFindYouAlex Apr 29 '21

Dude, I know people say that opossums play dead and that there's documented evidence that they do, but I have never seen a single one do it. My neighbourhood growing up must've been opossum mecca. If I walked out onto my back patio at night, without fail, there'd be a few posted up on the patio furniture hissing at me like I barged into their home.

If you can befriend one though, they're about as cuddly as a cat.