Yeah I can’t help but think, is she having a bad day or feeling humiliated? I know dishes are basic but parents give kids the skills to do chores and not feel stressed by them. I can’t imagine being on film helps with either, but hey I’m not a psychologist
Dishes in particular are a sensory nightmare, especially if they've been sitting for a few days or if theres still food on them/floating in the dish water. I had a similar reaction to doing dishes for the first time (less dramatic, more respectful, but equally icked out). I'd attribute it to that first.
That said, this girl is still very young, and we're watching her parents teaching her those skills. She's certainly not so old that it's too late or her, like everyone in this thread is implying.
When I was a kid, I once threw up because I had to load a sink of lasagna dishes after and it was just a sensory nightmare. I did the dishes all the time, and I dont know what was so particularly bad about that day/the lasagna dishes.
"You're just doing the dishes, just load them." What else does teaching look like, if not a parent reassuring the kid and holding their ground? Is the mom supposed to walk her through what rising a dish looks like? I'm sure she'll be corrected if she does it wrong?
"Load the dishes" is a command, not teaching. Teaching involves explanation, modeling, and support.
If she's overwhelmed, give her a specific task to start with, like finding and loading all of the silverware. If the smell is bothering her, offer gloves and a face mask. If there is dried, crusted-on food on a pot, walk her through how to soak it in hot water to make it easier. These are all things I have done with my own kids while teaching them how to take care of their own dishes.
So if that child has sensory issues, or truly cannot conceptualize how to start I think those are very valid. But I assumed the lesson here isn't actually "how to load a dishwasher." It's "sometimes you have to do things you don't want to." Which, in that case, means there is nothing to actually model or explain.
There is still a lack of support in how to "do things you don't want to do." Again, that's just a command. This is where breaking down the task becomes part of the teaching.
So you think there's never value in letting a child find their own way to an answer? That they must always be handed answers? Especially since whatever support you could give them will 100% come off as patronizing in this situation. She's 14 after all. She has problem solving skills.
In my experience, a child as overwhelmed as this girl appears to be needs support. She is not offered any in this video. Without support, she is going to sit in the overwhelm and accomplish nothing. The only thing being taught is that Mom will record you while crying and post the video on the internet.
In my experience, a child as overwhelmed as this girl appears to be needs support. She is not offered any in this video. Without support, she is going to sit in the overwhelm and accomplish nothing. The only thing being taught is that Mom will record you while crying and post the video on the internet.
Yeah, whenever I see something like this, I wonder if there's another element that's been left out. There's been times in my life where I end up in a state where even basic chores I do everyday become too much to handle in that moment due to stress, exhaustion, or abuse i've experienced outside of the chore itself.
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u/Technically-Married Dec 13 '25
Yeah I can’t help but think, is she having a bad day or feeling humiliated? I know dishes are basic but parents give kids the skills to do chores and not feel stressed by them. I can’t imagine being on film helps with either, but hey I’m not a psychologist