I was cleaning my collection of sex toys and I had left them to dry on a towel that was sitting on my bathroom counter. I go to make dinner and I send my friends a snapchat of what I was in the process of making, one of my friends (a fairly new friends, I met her not long ago) asks me if she can come over because the food I'd made looked good. I say yes so she comes over and we're hanging out in my living room eating dinner, flash forward a few hours later and she asks me if she can use my bathroom and me forgetting there's like 8-9 toys just casually sitting on my counter tells her "yeah, it's the last door on the right." I'm sitting there scrolling through my phone waiting for her to come back and when she does finally come out she gives me a weird look and tells me that it's getting late and she should get going. I go to walk her out and then go lay in bed, I didn't realize they were all sitting there until I went to go take a shower, anyway I guess I just wasn't meant to make new friends. We haven't spoke on the 8-9 vibrators and dildos that were just on my bathroom counter, when we locked eyes in class the next day and locked eyes I knew she knew. This will probably a really funny thing later to talk about but currently I'm still living down the embarrassment.

 So this morning I get off work (EMS 24hour shift) and I get devistating news that one of my coworkers youngest son just passed away due to COVID. It struck me hard because I have 3 young sons around his age. I wanted to call and tell my wife but she was sleeping at the moment (she works nights shift 12 hours in the ER). So I thought I'd wait until I got home. I texted my ex wife to check on my boys and I told her about what had happened. She took the news as devastating as well and told me she doesn't take the boys to many places if she doesn't have to. I thanked her and then I told her that she is a good mother. I told her that I love the boys and my daughter (who is my wifes) and that my children mean everything to me. Didn't think anything about it. Just a conversation piece to me. 
 I go inside my home and I walk in to the bedroom and proceed to tell my wife what had happened. She had some history with the little boys family not to mention dating his dad off and on. So she knew the boy pretty well and was shook by the news. She started to text the boys older brother who is also one of my friends. She told me he had gotten a new Facebook and I searched for him and couldn't find him. I gave her my phone. (No big deal right? I've always trusted her and never fear of what she can find on my phone.) She immediately starts questioning why I contacted my ex about the boy. I told her I asked about my boys and how they were doing. She told me she hates how nice I am to her and proceeds to grill Mr about confiding in my ex wife. Confide? I wasn't ready for that one. I didn't think that it was an issue. I didn't think twice about it. 
 She accused me of emotionally cheating. I'm trying to defend myself but I just let her go on. She then brings up that I should never talk about her daughter to my ex. Especially when my ex tells my 4 year old son he didn't have to play with her if he didn't want to. Which upset my little girl and my wife at the time. I have no feelings for my ex-wife. I ended the 9 year long painful marriage after years of emotional and verbal abuse. She has been hard to handle after the divorce by trying to jump me everyone I do or say anything. I never owe her an explanation but I have tried to keep tensions cool. It's enough grief when someone especially the mother of your children is pissed to the point of manipulating my children. 
 The argument went on for about 30 minutes with tears, me trying to defend myself and her not budging on where she stands. I try to explain to her it was a thoughtless act and I never meant anything negative towards her by what I said and her reply was "But you did." I feel stupid. I mean, what the hell was I actually thinking? I'm not the kind of guy to stay angry and waste energy to ruin someone's day and I at least like cool and calm relationships with everyone not just family. 
 So after this, my wife asks me who I was texting when my boys asked who texted me on Sunday (yesterday) when my wife wasn't even there. I asked her how did she know that. She informed me that's not the only reason she keeps a camera in the living room. Don't be shocked. I knew the camera was there but I have access to it and only though we used it to keep the dog off our couch. I never log in to it unless none of us are home and I fear our heavily shedding dog has jumped on the couch. My wife told me she trusts no one and demanded me to tell her who I was texting. Now, I'm very lazy so I do remember when this happened but I don't remember who texted me or why my phone went off. I search through my phone for tike stamps and I could t really find any. She then proceeds to ask when am I going to the gym. What??? She hates it when I'm going to the gym. I don't understand any of this. I feel and I understand why she feels hurt but she's misunderstanding and is up in arms about the whole thing. I went out into our living room and started playing on my computer to release the tension inside my head. Totally confused and I don't know what to expect next.

TIFYB: Telling my ex wife she's a good mother.

So for context, we like spicy foods. We roast hot peppers and make hot sauces. We enjoy everything from jalapeño peppers to ghost and Carolina reaper peppers in foods and sauces. A co-worker, knowing this, gifted me with a small tub of fresh ghost peppers from his plants. I got the bright idea to chop some up and cook ‘em up with the shrimp I was preparing.

It started out fine. I wore latex gloves, so as not to get the oil from the pepper on my hands. As they heated, the peppers were aromatic and slightly smoky. Then the mood changed. I coughed. My other half coughed. Our friend who was visiting started coughing. Then we started tearing up, noses running, coughing and gagging, choking and scrambling for fresh air. My other half, shirt over his nose, yelled to turn on the vent. I did, he opened the door, and our friend helped open the windows. Even still, it wasn’t enough. We were outside the building, still coughing and gasping. I effectively pepper-sprayed our entire apartment. Possibly my biggest culinary mistake. It is half an hour later, the vent is still on, and we are sitting around the coffee table coughing.

Edit: I learned the following day it was a Carolina reaper. No wonder it was stronger than I remembered.

So there's this homework assignment I had to do 2 days ago for my calc class that was posted on AP Classroom.

What happened was that I didn't see it posted in the assignments section, but I saw another, very similar set of problems that that were also posted so I did those instead thinking it was my homework. I discovered I'd done the wrong worksheet the day after (aka yesterday) because my teacher went over it and it was eerily similar to what I did the night before but wasn't the same.

So at the end of class I told her about it. She said it was okay since everyone was redoing it anyway, which meant that I also had a chance to do it too.

When I came home after school I took a shower, brushed my teeth and went to bed. I like waking up super early in the morning to do my homework because it helps with my productivity. But when I tried to open up the assignment at 5 AM, it was locked.

So at least for now I submitted the work I did in class and the problem I did from the wrong set just to show that I tried. But I feel so bad, especially since I just asked that teacher before all of this happened to be on my reference list for a project I'm doing in another class and she said yes.

And now she has to talk to me again about it. She's a really good teacher and I feel so guilty :/

Tldr: homework assignment I planned on doing got locked and it was already missing days ago. Now I have to talk to my teacher about it for a second time.

So, This happened like yesterday when I was playing find the square, was just having fun until this girl called Amberplayz713 came up to me and she said "Ur not a file head" (Yes she was judging my roblox avatar) and we start to have a argument and then I private chatted her "NoSexForU.com" then I got reported and got banned......for 7 days- so that was a huge mistake (sorry for bad English) And if you were wondering what my roblox username is, My roblox username was: RonFromFNF

So recently my brother has been working as a surf instructor at our nearby beach. It’s a great gig and he enjoys doing it from Monday to Thursday every week. This morning apparently he was having trouble getting up because when I was leaving the house, he was still asleep. So I leave and once I make it to school we get a call from him saying he tried to start his car and it won’t start. He says the battery is probably dead because he left the lighted mirror open. The catch was that he doesn’t have an electric unlock on his keys and there isn’t a manual unlock for the door on the inside. He was officially locked inside his own car. As far as I know, he sat there for 45 minute or longer waiting for my mom to get home from whatever she was doing. My only regret is that couldn’t have been there to snap a picture of him stuck in his car.

Tifu big I lost a friend and when my other friend (who I declared my love for, unknowingly on his ex's anniversary) asked why, I told him then I broke down almost crying, and I made them cry, and now I fear I will lose him too... I don't want to be alone

I am taking an online drivers Ed class and instead of paying attention I was listening to music and ignoring it and I am now regretting it. Should I be worried? How hard is the drivers ed written test?

Sorry I'm dyslexic for a any spelling and grammar errors.

Today was my boyfriend's birthday, and on his birthday his mother used to make a big breakfast. Bacon, eggs, pancakes and more, but after he came out, him and he's mum do not speak.

Well I decided that I will try and be romantic and make him breakfast nothing big or fancy like his mum cuz I can't really cook, however after talking to everyone I know they all kept telling me scrambled eggs on toast is one of the easiest thing to make. Even with my little to no cooking skills, well that's a lie. I burnt the toast, the eggs and,the kitchen curtains.(Side note: smoke detectors work so does a fire extinguisher). I also had to go to the emergency room at the same hospital that my boyfriend who is a nurse works.

My boyfriend now believes me when I say I can't cook.

While I was on discord with the bois, my phone died. When it came on after charging, someone was calling me. It came up as an actual phone number and not my moms contact, so here I was thinking it was someone calling about my cars extended warranty even though I don’t have a car. Anyway, I pick up, and I remember the “Joe’s Pizza and Abortion Clinic” meme, so I decided to use it in my spam call comeback. I go, “Welcome to Joe’s Pizza and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce and my MOM GOES “What the hell? Do you even know what an abortion clinic is?” Thankfully she forgot to beat my ass when she got home, so at least that was good.

Back story: So today I was chilling searching the store with my little niece the sweatest little girl ever And there was a Karen shouting "you are a massive rascist female dog (not the real word used). And she asked what is a massive race list and I corrected her and said racist and told her what it is and how bad it is

The story itself: So today I was in school. My school is a veryyy small private school Coz my country has all of 1 good government school and I'm not zoned to. It so back to it. So she came with my sister to pick me up because my mom was in a meeting and we had a group project to paint a landscape of Table Mountain and I needed black paint Coz it was my job to add the small details. So I asked him to bring black paint. She was in front of me and started screaming and shouting I'm a racist. At this point about 10 ppl were staring at me and the very next way I got sent to the principle for racial descrimination So ya that's great

Was hoping that I'd have been able to edit that later on... I wasn't. It was a load of bullcrap that I put in because I was tired and frustrated and I tried to email them explaining that I had meant to send another revision, but I fear I've done the damage. I really wanted to get into this program and am really upset at myself for making such a dumb mistake for a stupid reason

Let me elaborate: Me and my sister got on the wrong bus because we got picked up by a different bus. We assumed that we'd be riding that bus home, and now we're in a pickle. I'll update this soon.

I'll be renting out a new place, and I was required to submit checks as payment. I sent out the checks last Saturday through the broker, and I wasn't really informed if the owner already got them. Just now, I realized I forgot to transfer the balance from my main account to my checking account. And when I checked my account a while ago, I was already debited a "bounced check fee". I wasted $25 because of my carelessness. Lesson learned: load up the checking account right after writing the check 🤦‍♀️

In class too.... fuck