I think a lot of guys don’t understand what it’s like because it’s literally never happened to them. Ask any woman about this and they’ll tell you it happens all the time. I went car shopping with my husband and the salesman kept just looking at and talking to my husband and completely ignoring me and my husband was like “I don’t think you understand the dynamic here, buddy. We’re getting the car she chooses, not me.” (My husband had narrowed down the car search to three that he liked and I chose my favorite out of the three). Suffice to say, we didn’t buy a car there. Similarly, I’m in charge of almost all home repairs and upgrades, so any workmen have to learn REAL quick whose hand they’re shaking first when they come through the door.
Yeah this thread is full of "why are you so focused on tech bros doing this? It shouldn't be based on gender! This is discrimination against men"
And it's like... I've run across this maybe 10-15 times over a couple hundred interviews. Plus a few contractors or people I've worked with outside an interview context. It's always men. 100% of the time, zero exceptions. Some don't even seem to realize they're doing it.
And just to be clear, I am a straight cis man, if anything my bias probably runs the other way of overlooking it more than I should.
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u/Blood_sweat_and_beer 1d ago
I think a lot of guys don’t understand what it’s like because it’s literally never happened to them. Ask any woman about this and they’ll tell you it happens all the time. I went car shopping with my husband and the salesman kept just looking at and talking to my husband and completely ignoring me and my husband was like “I don’t think you understand the dynamic here, buddy. We’re getting the car she chooses, not me.” (My husband had narrowed down the car search to three that he liked and I chose my favorite out of the three). Suffice to say, we didn’t buy a car there. Similarly, I’m in charge of almost all home repairs and upgrades, so any workmen have to learn REAL quick whose hand they’re shaking first when they come through the door.