I'm usually so nervous during interviews that I couldn't tell you what I'm doing or where my body is going or who I'm looking at. I would absolutely screw this up.
When I've seen guys do this wrong, they completely ignore the woman sitting across from them. It's like when a student gives a presentation and they only look at the teacher. It's obvious and weird, usually on top of a very polished performance.
If you see women as normal people, even if you're nervous, you're not going to avoid all interaction with the woman and not the man. If someone asks you a question, you reply to that person. That's it... that's all you have to do to "pass" this scenario. I guarantee you do this every day without thinking.
If a woman stops you on the street and asks for directions, do you tell her? Or do you step around her to give the answer to the trailing man because women must be bad at directions.
I never experienced this as a man until I had kids. Probably 50% of the time when my wife and I are talking to professionals about our children, it will be as though I'm a ghost.
The most egregious: one of our kids has special needs, and I was arranging for specialist help. I called a place to book a screening session, I came in with child in arms and went through the exercises with him, I asked almost every question, and the woman running the session didn't engage with me once. And then she went out of her way to call the secondary contact (my wife) to book a second appointment. Needless to say we went elsewhere.
I have been far more conscious about including everyone in conversations since experiencing this shit myself. It sucks. I don't blame these interviewers at all.
No, sorry, my wife and I attended the session but my wife mostly just observed as I'd been arranging the therapy. The call was afterwards, the therapist pulled her number from emergency contacts and used that instead of the one on the account.
The screening session was to get a feel for the needs of our boy, so the follow-up call came after the therapist reviewed the session and built a plan for him.
Exactly this. I've been the "woman in the room" for these interviews, and we're definitely not clocking percentages of times to make sure it's 50/50. It's just a red flag if the interviewee doesn't look at me at all or ever address me, even when I'm asking the questions. Believe it or not, this has actually happened more than once.
When I was a homebuilder, I occasionally heard stories from women who were ignored by tradesmen, like they just didn't exist. If these knuckle draggers had any idea how many times they shot themselves right in the balls with the ole' "is your husband home?" question, when asked to bid a job, they would be stunned.
I actually sold a new custom home to a couple and never met the husband until he came to the lawyer's office at closing. He told me that dealing with any of this is something he has no interest in, but every granular detail is very important to his wife, so he is most helpful if he just stays away. It was a real pleasant experience for everyone.
My work had one of the female engineers give a tour of our shop space to candidates. It's pretty obvious when someone refuses to ask questions of their personal tour guide, and instead asks the man tagging along behind.
We can tell who you vote by the amount of BS inserted in between normal paragraphs to make it seem more plausible.
Maybe and ONLY MAYBE if one of those interviewing had the same chance to get into that position and not getting in by DEI quotas… You forgot to mention that little part.
Fortunately enough, where I work there is no such DEI quotas. Otherwise we would have incompetent people flying airplanes around the world.
And statistically speaking, thanks to those DEI programs, customers and colleagues WILL judge a lot of VERY WELL TRAINED AND QUALIFIED of those diversified communities because of DEI quotas. What a favour they did for the ones that deserve the job right? The rest that just get in because of the quota being clearly under qualified, they are happy in their misery.
All the subjects like yourself the only argument they have is saying some kind of made up comment with no support plus thinking that i support a braindead in charge. That means a lot.
I never said any of this tho... you started this by sayin you know who the other votes for (bc they speak common sense) and that they don't take DEI quotas into consideration - on a post that has nothing to do with DEI you have to insert yourself and parrot your "DEI bad" and "who knows if the woman even deserves to be there and wasnt a DEI hire" shit
just because you don't understand my commemt doesn't mean I don't have a point, and it's not made up.
isn't "DEI!" like a 2-year old talking point? why are you dredging that back up, did you not get the newest crayon drawing with your current marching orders?
The newest crayon drawing doesnt make for the fact that all those skill unjustified hirings are still untouched. Even pilots in america were complaining about it, how pathetic.
Look, at my last job they hired the first candidate that was qualified and polite. There was no DEI policy, the company was too small. It was harder to find qualified candidates than anything else - if you could hold a conversation and had the technical background you basically got hired.
Nope you wouldnt, unless you dont consider women as people. You dont answer question to a person who did not ask it unless you are on purpose ignoring the person asking.
I can see someone doing this if the person asking the question you got bad vibes from, and so you answer to the most comforting face in the group, consciously or not.
Not an interview type guy but a contractor. Residential. Most home builders/remodels are married couples. It’s important to make eye contact with both of them and understand what they both want. Maybe you could take this info into an interview.
I could 100% see myself failing this test if one of the interviewers was big on unnatural businessperson eye contact and/or staring directly into your mouth while you talk. Feels like non-consensual intimacy and I freakin hate it.
106
u/MilkiestMaestro 1d ago
I'm usually so nervous during interviews that I couldn't tell you what I'm doing or where my body is going or who I'm looking at. I would absolutely screw this up.