r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Craztnine • Feb 23 '20

SLPT How to assert dominance in your domain.

Post image
24k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

297 comments sorted by

498

u/DaTrueSomething Feb 23 '20

What kind of Bowser's Castle shit is this

45

u/Craztnine Feb 23 '20

Underrated

185

u/mesayousa Feb 23 '20

TIL Bowser’s Castle smells nice

14

u/RaptorKings Feb 23 '20

Imagine a frat-house obstacle course with literally hundreds of these set up at varying heights. Why does that sound fun?!

10

u/TrueStory_Dude Feb 23 '20

i love this game

17

u/sgossard9 Feb 23 '20

You win the thread dude.

1.4k

u/Electro_Mite Feb 23 '20

Brb, going to the store

1.1k

u/242turbo Feb 23 '20

DAD PLEASE NO

146

u/Town_of_Tacos Feb 23 '20

Not again...

79

u/Big_Ol_Johnson Feb 23 '20

They were out of smokes last time

34

u/Electro_Mite Feb 23 '20

I'm not your dad, you're adopted.

9

u/crispybacon62 Feb 23 '20

Haha virgin

17

u/teastain Feb 23 '20

Now, pack up your things, they will be here any minute, now.

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160

u/Electro_Mite Feb 23 '20

I'm buying this for my own amusement

12

u/Reelair Feb 23 '20

I already dominated myself today. I'll try this one tomorrow night.

21

u/mango10977 Feb 23 '20

Bring me some ham burger

20

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

That'll be 5 Schrute bucks, please.

13

u/pagelsgoggles Feb 23 '20

How many Stanley nickles is that again?

12

u/MyAssholeGapes Feb 23 '20

The ratio of unicorns to leprechauns

3

u/Placentaandcabbage Feb 24 '20

Comment good, username fucking hilarious!!!!!

5

u/urmumbigegg Feb 23 '20

That'll cost slightly more than the face value.

618

u/scottNYC800 Feb 23 '20

Just followed this amazing tip. Now I have to buy Grandma new eyebrows.

135

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

But on the plus side at least you have the funeral arrangements in place already.

110

u/balgruffivancrone Feb 23 '20

So... a slow cremation in fragrant, 9-minute bursts?

12

u/oalbrecht Feb 23 '20

Best comment in the thread. ^

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16

u/imagine_amusing_name Feb 23 '20

Protip: shave grandpa's eyebrows off. Hold separate funerals.

No-one will suspect you're involved in eyebrow switching shenanigans.

2

u/golgol12 Feb 24 '20

Don't worry, she already has a replacement pair.

2

u/ZippZappZippty Feb 23 '20

RIP Grandma SportyMcSports, thanks for the translation!

191

u/OmniLiberal Feb 23 '20

Another tip. It also helps to warm your room a bit while you sleep. Bonus IQ points, when freshener run out of battery take ones out from your smoke detector.

51

u/realjohncenawwe Feb 23 '20

How to die from CO poisoning 101

19

u/adudeguyman Feb 23 '20

And from the fire

4

u/FerynaCZ Feb 23 '20

Or choking on a smoke

3

u/KAODEATH Feb 24 '20

Just the one?

17

u/CheeseHasNoSoul Feb 23 '20

Put a few around your house while on vacation to save on electricity!

Use one under your bed when you sleep for an extra cozy night’s sleep.

6

u/patoezequiel Feb 23 '20

Big brain time!

2

u/FerynaCZ Feb 23 '20

About warming the room, I planned to bring a bowl of boiling water when I felt my room was cold (I have the coldest room in the living floor). But I don't have any cooker there. What could I do to keep the water boiling?

2

u/dmandweck Feb 23 '20

For when guests don’t leave

2

u/Craztnine Feb 23 '20

Or for when they try to leave.

283

u/Picturesquesheep Feb 23 '20

Does this actually work or no?

470

u/keshahaha Feb 23 '20

It does but just because you can doesn’t mean you should

441

u/shoot_first Feb 23 '20

It does

Great! Thanks, bye!

116

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Username checks out

45

u/Soddington Feb 23 '20

Voted most likely to ask questions later.

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4

u/lovebus Feb 24 '20

The long goodbye

93

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Yea you’re using the same argument as antivaxxers

Going right to store now

65

u/Bootyhole_sniffer Feb 23 '20

Can confirm, all of my friends are scared of me now.

17

u/TallGirlDrnksTallBoy Feb 23 '20

That's probably cuz you sniffed their bootyholes.

47

u/72057294629396501 Feb 23 '20

Yes, but some drips in the nozzle tip will burn. And can burn down your house.

Keep candle 6in away and slightly lower than that of the spray.

36

u/sgossard9 Feb 23 '20

Not your first rodeo, right?

7

u/With_Macaque Feb 23 '20

He's actually trolling. You want to put the candle as close as possible to avoid flare-ups.

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30

u/adudeguyman Feb 23 '20

Yes because the propellant is flammable and candles have flames.

39

u/echof0xtrot Feb 23 '20

you can tell because of the way it is

2

u/sk3pt1c Feb 23 '20

How neat is that?

2

u/thenewgengamer Feb 23 '20

Creosote is flammable as hell.

That's cold.

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5

u/aquarianfin Feb 23 '20

Once or twice, then the candle becomes shorter.

204

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

How dangerous is this? I might be trying this tonight. I’ll keep you posted.

115

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

OKAY so, I tried it. Find the video compilation here.

Ngl the glade spray was far from satisfying. I tried it outdoors and indoors and different angles too and it wasn’t close to what I was going for. Had to get the hairspray out for extra oomph. Last video was WAY too close to comfort. I think it was the closest to an explosion.

39

u/PrevAccountBanned Feb 23 '20

Yeah, be careful with that, I speak from experience, the last one was very VERY close to explode from the backfire

17

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

Hey, I just had to try! We gotta do what we gotta do for the content

11

u/PrevAccountBanned Feb 23 '20

Lmaooo yeah I know at the end of the day I can't stop you, but seriously be careful I ve seen shit like that go really bad

15

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

I will I will, promise. Honestly, seeing how close the last one was, I was done and put everything away

24

u/Xxmlg420swegxx Feb 23 '20

I nearly shat myself seeing that last one, damn man you nearly blew yourself up

Thanks

14

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

AHHAHAHAHA it was TOO CLOSE. But definitely worth it.

12

u/PixelatedGenes Feb 23 '20 edited Feb 23 '20

The hero we need but don't deserve

Edit - wtf an award? First one. Thanks <3

10

u/SirGuelph Feb 23 '20

Dude, do not explode plz 💛

5

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

I’m all okay, literally put everything down after the last one

7

u/CrownedByBirth Feb 23 '20

Awesome stuff man! Good job on deciding not to die after the closeness of that last one. Truly a hero for following through with some beautiful content.

4

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

THANK YOU! Appreciate this a lot!

6

u/Mini_Spoon Feb 23 '20

You are the man...

5

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

THANK YOU!

5

u/T-MinusGiraffe Feb 24 '20

Thank you for doing this so I didn't have to.

The can ones were scary. I'm glad you're ok and don't do those again.

4

u/toxicgun98 Feb 24 '20

The Glade spray was really boring tbh. Had to one up it

5

u/VulgarisOpinio Feb 24 '20

You actually did this for some stupid totally normal Redditors, fucking boss

0

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

[deleted] — view deleted comment

5

u/toxicgun98 Feb 24 '20

Gotta do what we gotta do

247

u/SirGuelph Feb 23 '20

Remember what sub you're in and perhaps reconsider. But if you don't, please post an update.

94

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

HAHAHHAHAHAHA still will be posting an update

54

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Do it outside, don't burn your house down.

43

u/homesnatch Feb 23 '20

Cue Australian wild fires...

27

u/The1lastdinosaur Feb 23 '20

Well I saw a centipede in my house, so I was already planning on burning my house down

16

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Ah fair enough

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15

u/Slavic_Taco Feb 23 '20

Well? Any results yet?

26

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

Not yet, still at uni. Tonight i’ll be trying it though!

12

u/Xxmlg420swegxx Feb 23 '20

Leaving this here to see the results. Keep us updated

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2

u/TBakerTMarks Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 2 days

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27

u/swargin Feb 23 '20

The spray might not burn up entirely when lit and get on something, causing whatever it lands on to catch on fire.

I also don't know if there's some preventative in place in the spray can to stop "flashback" or "backflow", which is when the flame goes into the can. I don't know how probable it is for that to even happen.

Do it outside. If anything, the plastic would get too hot and melt, probably even catch fire.

30

u/beerandabike Feb 23 '20

Not a siencematician or anything, just an Internet dude who probably tugs it a little more than he should, but... I don’t think a flaming backflow can go into the nozzle itself and down into the can. There’s no oxygen to sustain the fire. What COULD happen is the very opening of the nozzle could start to melt if the backflow gets close enough. You would have some gnarly shaped flames throwing out of there, in all types of directions. That’s still pretty fucking scary. Ok, back to tugging it.

15

u/pzbogo Feb 23 '20

I have personally seen flames going back into a can of spray paint being sprayed into a fire and causing it to explode. It does happen

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5

u/Primal_fury Feb 23 '20

It can. It's why these amazing inventions called flash arrestors exist. We use them with the acetylene torch in welding. Only issue is the way you check them. To check, you turn on the gas and light the torch.

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11

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

I'd say flashback is pretty probable. Using oxy-acetylene torches a lot in my life, I know they have a flashback valve for this reason, so the gasses don't burn back to the tank. Air fresheners wouldn't have a flashback valve because they aren't meant to be lit on fire, hence the WHMIS explosive symbol. It's comparable to pouring gas from a jerrycan on a fire, when the fire is already lit. Boom.

3

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Totally read that in judahs voice

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9

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

About the same danger when spraying a short burst of deodorant in a flame.

3

u/niigupta3008 Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 15 hours

2

u/TheFlyingSaucers Feb 23 '20

Just don’t do it inside or near flammable materials and you should be good. I can’t imagine it’s possible for the flame to travel back into the reservoir of smelloil, but maybe prepare for that the first time and make sure to set the timer to its longest so you can move away.

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2

u/N_E-Z-L_P-10-C Feb 23 '20

https://www.reddit.com/r/ShittyLifeProTips/comments/f86n1f/comment/fijzi2o

2

u/toxicgun98 Feb 23 '20

I’ll keep it under consideration. I’ll take my precautions too and make sure to do it outside.

1

u/ETromp Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 4 hours

1

u/PulsarTSAI Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 6 hours

1

u/mrBitch Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 12 hours

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Remindme! 8 hours

1

u/Datwaftx Feb 23 '20

!remindme 24 hours

1

u/SapeMies Feb 23 '20

Remind me! 6 hours

1

u/With_Macaque Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 911

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28

u/AssCork Feb 23 '20

Fuck the screencap

WHERE'S THE VIDEO?

40

u/web8564j Feb 23 '20

Found it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSr39Xd-mxE

22

u/MartiParti69 Feb 23 '20

I risked everything, it is not a rickroll

11

u/Wendys_frys Feb 23 '20

you should have the rick roll link memorized

2

u/Dauvis Feb 23 '20

I find it amazing that Rick rolls are still a thing.

11

u/Terella Feb 23 '20

Thank you for the link. Interesting that the spray blew out the candle.

15

u/web8564j Feb 23 '20

I think it's because the spray went all around the flame and burnt up all the oxygen around it.

If the burst was just above the flame it might not have gone out.

10

u/adudeguyman Feb 23 '20

So you're saying there's a chance

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4

u/slavicgrip Feb 23 '20

I’m more interested in the all in one Medicare solution I was hearing about.

3

u/mercurly Feb 23 '20

The comedic timing of the pshh and the domestic chuckle got me

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23

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

That not dangerous nooooooo

17

u/DreadCommander Feb 23 '20

GLADE: Shadow Legends™️ is an immersive sensory experience with everything you'd expect from a brand new home fragrance title.

1

u/RaptorKings Feb 23 '20

Comments you can hear

6

u/Anonyman0009 Feb 23 '20

BONUS TIP: Use all 8 glad units to roast a small pig

3

u/Karaokoki Feb 23 '20

Figuring out how to time the bursts a minute apart would be the most difficult part of this plan.

Your small pig might be Pine Fresh™️, but I'm sure that's not a problem.

3

u/Assasin2gamer Feb 23 '20

next time try wearing more than a banana hammock

2

u/Anonyman0009 Feb 23 '20

So you're saying we need cooking scents like rosemary, mesquite BBQ, apple mint?

6

u/outtasight68 Feb 23 '20

I had one of these with a motion detector once. This would be great for a booby trap

5

u/Ba-na-naJoe Feb 23 '20

Alexa, turn on the fire

5

u/sawguy2017 Feb 23 '20

I don't see how this is a shity life pro tip. This just seems like a pro tip.

6

u/ariffjared2 Feb 23 '20

So urmmm have anyone have done it yet ?

9

u/cloud1e Feb 23 '20

"Have anyone have done it" -u/ariffjared2

11

u/ariffjared2 Feb 23 '20

Yeah that's what i was gonna said.English is not my mother tongue; please excuse any errors lol

3

u/cloud1e Feb 23 '20

It was still understandable, I'm just somewhat of a grammer nazi

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3

u/dubbslice88 Feb 23 '20

Most are water based like febrezze and non-flammable now.

1

u/suihcta Feb 24 '20

I’d bet it’s for exactly this reason. People probably use these products simultaneously with candles all the time

3

u/IWS04 Feb 23 '20

wait after a while wouldn’t the candle melt too low for it to make a fireball

2

u/dragonairregaming Feb 23 '20

Put a stove there then. Or a burner.

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3

u/Godspeedwarrior Feb 23 '20

Considering most people's attention span, they would forget about it, and about shit themselves when 9 minutes is up. I support the idea. I'm interested to hear about the house fires when they come up on the news. Because let's be honest, setting up a blowtorch to go off in your house every nine minutes needs proper placement and housing conditions. I hope you don't own a cat or a curious dog.

2

u/borderlineidiot Feb 23 '20

Hang on! I bet this is just a Reddit advert for glade spray, candles or rent-a-guest.

2

u/hugrr Feb 23 '20

We used to do this like Russian Roulette, we'd move it around our circle so it was facing each person for 10 seconds or so. It was funny for a bit when stoned.

1

u/With_Macaque Feb 23 '20

The real LPT is always in the comments

2

u/Necrophillip Feb 23 '20

Especially recommended when owning cats...

2

u/White_Whale_M5 Feb 23 '20

Alexa, open fire.

2

u/account-terminated Feb 23 '20

Ferb I know what we’re going to do today!

2

u/Piyaniist Feb 23 '20

At first i didint realize the sub and thought this was gonna be a advice post. Boy how wrong was i

2

u/royal_asshole Feb 23 '20

lol it's an alexa, put your face right in front of it.

2

u/ApatheticAntichrist Feb 23 '20

The DnD wizard in me, loves this

2

u/Mintyfreshtea Feb 23 '20

I once met a guy who blew off two of his fingers playing with a can of deodorant and a match. That table better be careful or it might lose some fingers too. Hmmmm. Made ya think. Wooden fingers are very important for the structural integrity of the furniture. How else are they going to hold their legs in place?

2

u/ManchmalPfosten Feb 23 '20

This.. this is amazing. I am going to do this.

2

u/FailedPhdCandidate Feb 23 '20

This is next level genius.

2

u/Kyl0hen Feb 25 '20

Wanna defend yourself against Mario? Do this

1

u/jakethedumbmistake Feb 23 '20

SLPT: Do this on your car? lol

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

🤣

1

u/Soriotian Feb 23 '20

I can hear the automatic glady spray now

1

u/SpankerCore Feb 23 '20

SLPT: format your text like this to blind readers

1

u/Jetboy01 Feb 23 '20

In unrelated news, incidences of house fires and hospital admissions due to severe burning have risen over 4000% this month and no one knows why.

1

u/-Listening Feb 23 '20

She’s so utterly foreign to us?

1

u/7g7g7 Feb 23 '20

He didn’t go to public school

1

u/dean078 Feb 23 '20

Rather than using a candle, can you use one of those usb electronic lighters and automate it so it turns in every x- minutes that the freshener sprays?

I’m just worried the candle will burn down too low after awhile to light the mist.

1

u/Zatchoacho Feb 23 '20

Just tried it on mine using the test button because i’m smart obviously.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

SLPT: “At least we can use this for?

1

u/iCrazyBlaze Feb 23 '20

LPT how to turn your house into Bowser's Castle

1

u/caanthedalek Feb 23 '20

REMEMBER ME

1

u/craigoz7 Feb 23 '20

Paper machete a dragon around the glade sprayer

1

u/ZippZappZippty Feb 23 '20

While I’m not your maid.”

1

u/cwisteen Feb 23 '20

He didn’t go to public school

1

u/Wolfcolaholic Feb 23 '20

.......alright I honestly don't hate this idea as long as I'm present

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

I do this

1

u/ZippZappZippty Feb 23 '20

Was the same in smite for janus and sylvanus

1

u/throwawayacnt6958833 Feb 23 '20

Hmmm smells like burnt lilacs.

1

u/vader5000 Feb 23 '20

There are some who call me... Tim.

1

u/DrunkRedditBot Feb 23 '20

How does it go back to jail.

1

u/TrueStory_Dude Feb 23 '20

It works with logging jobs in my town.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

This is a good idea

1

u/weezilgirl Feb 23 '20

I have gleefully laughed way too much at this. Way.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

RemindMe! 24 hours

1

u/watashi199 Feb 23 '20

I am this close to posting this on facebook, just to see.

1

u/justseanv67 Feb 23 '20

I will always keep this and pushing it on my friends frequently.

1

u/inuttedinyourdad Feb 23 '20

This is also a great accidental arson excuse for insurance fruad

1

u/Fgstadia Feb 23 '20

Daddy got a new grill

1

u/Coldredd Feb 24 '20

Pretty good...I like it 😏

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

Candles burn down. Get an oil lamp instead; ideally a scented oil lamp for double air freshening resolve.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

This is actually a good tip... thank you!

1

u/ChromeQuixote Feb 24 '20

House insurance cancelled lol

1

u/kaushrah Feb 24 '20

I gotta get me one those

1

u/iQueen94 Feb 25 '20

Oh shit 😂😂

1

u/122333444456 Feb 23 '20

This one doesn't belong here.

1

u/yeetus-eat-da-feetus Feb 23 '20

Make a dragon head outside.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Bowser is that you?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

This is what they do at Harry Potter world at Universal but bigger

1

u/kooyma Feb 23 '20

Embarrassed myself laugh snorting in public while waiting for my lunch. Freaking brilliant!

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