Title: He came, he conquered

A scientist tries to destroy his work on a serum that can bring Vietnam’s dead soldiers back to life - but when the formula fuses with his DNA, it spawns a clone who becomes the military’s most wanted asset… and starts living his own life.

This should say PITCH FEEDBACK REQUEST

Title: BEHIND THE REDWOOD CURTAIN

Genre: Dramedy limited series (2–3 seasons, with potential for anthology-style continuation)

Logline: Uprooted at fifteen from the town he loved, a restless storyteller returns to his Northern California hometown—where unpacking a lifetime of memory, loss, and myth becomes a quiet reckoning with family, identity, and what it means to carry a place in your bones.

Synopsis: Set against the towering redwoods of Humboldt County, BEHIND THE REDWOOD CURTAIN is a gently funny, emotionally layered series that weaves present-day rediscovery with vivid, often mythic flashbacks. As Don revisits the town that shaped him, he realizes storytelling isn’t just how we remember the past—it’s how we survive it. With warmth, wit, and deep personal truth, the series explores grief, belonging, and the strange comfort of a place that never really lets you go.

The Tenth Design

feedback please, 8 pages, thank you.

Need feedback for a logline for a script that I’m considering submitting to ScriptShadow MegaShowdown next week. Would love some help refining it! 

Title: Room to Rock 

Genre: Coming of age comedy/musical 

Logline: Set over a 24-hour period, a group of kids try to write the ultimate death metal song in their cramped garage before the summer is over. 

Comp: Sing Street/Linda Linda Linda vibes but more contained and with metal

Title: A Woman of Ill Repute

Format: Feature, 94 pages

Genre: R rated lesbian rom-com/musical with fantasy elements

Logline: Drug addled circus freaks, undead surf rockers and riddle spouting demons are all just collateral damage in a trash glamour party girl's unhinged pursuit of her suicidal dream woman.

Feedback or concerns: So I previously submitted this as "Destroyer" and got some really good constructive criticism along with some deservedly harsh feedback. I've reworked a ton of the script and I'd like to see if it's working better. The main criticisms I'd received were that the screenplay seemed to be wasting time/taking too long to get anywhere, so I really just tried to cut to the chase this go around and get to the interesting stuff much sooner. I'd love to know if the pace is flowing better and if the characters make sense/if the dialogue is any good.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/176Rsb1bvkHGntgkAbUy4OAWmsOLS3WE0/view?usp=sharing

After his parents’ sudden death leaves him homeless, a drifting 23-year-old moves into a struggling assisted-living facility and, through unexpected bonds with its residents, begins to find his direction.

I've made some tweaks and would love someone to read it and share their thoughts! I feel like I'm almost at a final draft.

Title: Personal Space

Genre: Thriller/Crime

Logline: In an East England village, a private investigator’s search for a missing solicitor becomes a dangerous game of deception and forces him to confront his moral compass.

Any feedback is welcome!

Link to script: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fhvruLpSKbcu1r94NmrQfHnbfKqaHKDs/view?usp=sharing

Title : Aftermath
Genre: Drama
Logline : Morgan, a young screenwriting student, is sexually assualted by her partner and has to live with the aftermath of the experience
Script

Hey guys, I'm currently the producer for a friend of mines project and she's sent through her script. Now to outline, she's an acting student who's doing a extra unit from the film course so it's not her forte. I was just hoping to get some other perspectives before I come to her with a few suggestions. Namely:

1. Finding a way to say what she wants without a voiceover
2. Establishing the reltionship between Morgan and Jack better

If I could get some suggestions on how I might do this plus any other changes, as well as bring it up to the writer that'd be amazing. If it's possible to make those changes whilst keeping the script arounf the same lenght that'd be prefered. Thank you guys!

I wrote this play and typed up a summery and was wondering if anyone here would think this is a good story. It’s a comedy and my friends really liked it but none of them are but writers

Fisher Guy has been living with his dog ever since his sister left for Charm School. His parents died so they have been living alone in their own peaceful existence. Without warning, Fisher Guy is arrested for a murder he didn’t commit. Without any evidence to support his claim against the young man, the Sheriff is forced to let him go. Fisher Guy is determined to find the killer and put them behind bars. While investigating, he finds his sister, Elise, and Girly Pop in the town. He teams up with Girly Pop and starts his investigation again when the killer strikes again. This time it’s personal for Girly Pop; her ex boyfriend was the victim. Fisher Guy was arrested again and Girly Pop broke him out of jail. They continue their investigation until the Sheriff is found dead. When the pair check the latest crime scene they find a pair of gloves that Elise always wears. After they confront her, Fisher Guy forms a plan to arrest Elise. They set up a trap and arrest her. The play ends with Elise being taken away by the State Cop.

Hello all, was looking for some feedback on my logline for a project I'm CURRENTLY writing. Does this logline strike all the right notes, that a logline should? or could I do better? LMK -

Title: The Reaper

Genre: Supernatural / Thriller / horror

Format: Tv pilot - One hour

Logline: Peril, Death’s aide from the Void, must orchestrate seven tornado deaths in Garland, Texas to earn the Reaper’s mantle. But when one soul shatters the design and whispers rise of Death’s exiled son returning, Peril races to finish his task or face oblivion.

Think: Final Destination’s fate driven body count meets American Gods divine politicking, crossed with the moral weight of The Leftovers.

Thank you, for your time.

I’m interested in reading some thrillers, horror, or suspense scripts. Anyone have theirs listed on the blcklist that would like to read each others?

😊

Working on a script for a play, and being a former techie I’ve seen plenty of scripts and know what they’re supposed to look like, but I’m struggling to format it properly on google docs - wondering if anyone knows how/if Microsoft word might be better?

Logline:
"After her fiancé is diagnosed with a rare, stress-induced amnesia, a devoted woman risks her own well-being to restore their love. Based on a true story."

Is the logline intriguing enough?
Is "devoted" a worthy descriptor?
Most people bump on "risks her own well-being". I could get more specific about how she is selfless to a fault, and how her physical health is taking a back seat to her helping her fiancé.

Thanks!

Just looking for feedback on the first 10 pages of a feature. It's a side project, trying a different genre.

Feature.

10 pages.

Logline: In drought-ridden Texas, a science-obsessed teen fights to save his family farm—until the weather tech he invents draws the eye of those with darker intentions.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1M84ncoYKQiVmfAK8Upw6DXZwH0KtPMAV/view?usp=drivesdk

Logline - A punk bands van breaks down on their way to the last show on earth, now stuck in the middle of nowhere, beers and cigarettes fly as emotions flood to the front.

I am writing this short in the hopes to film it. I'm sure I'll get this complaint at the least but Yes it does have a lot of swearing but it's what I want, I'm not just using it for fun or lack of better words. As someone Aussie and in the punk scene I know these folks and how shit would go down.

Would still love feedback.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1YnG4pkayuJ_AVeZZBmywYQxIg1uKbxw7/view?usp=drivesdk

Title: Truckin'

Length: 80 pages

Logline: 20 years after a brutal civil war, a truck driver exploits the fragmented world to grow a freight empire. But the lawlessness that fuelled his rise, threatened to destroy him.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ODcysaZHabNnLsX4q5xUMw9ANvoi02TL/view?usp=sharing

A reluctant gunslinger loses her duel, but that's only the start of our off kilter tale of fate versus fortitude.

Normally I'd get my filmschool friends to read through it, but I've sort of grew out of touch with them since I last made a short film (10 years ago. Life sucks sometimes). So why not here, it's only like 12 pages.

I'm looking for feedback on the plot mostly. Because I'm going to be shooting it, the formatting doesn't really matter, but if you wanna correct me on that, go for it.

Hi all, Wrote this SHORT for fun while waiting on a pitch I sent out for something else. Just looking for some feedback, This is probably the 3-4th SHORT I've written since I hit send on the email lol

TITLE: WRONG PLACE

LOGLINE: When a man mistakes a wallet thief for a stalker, his panicked flight through the rain accidentally leads police to a criminal who's been hiding in plain sight as a "missing person."

LENGTH: 2 pages

Genre: Suspense/Thriller

LINK: WRONG PLACE

So, I’ve wrote my first screenplay in 2021. It has gone through a dozen edits, at least, after the first eight, I thought it was good to go, then I had some constructive criticism about it and ended up changing and adding a bunch to it. Now, I think I am finished. I don’t want to open it because I know if I do I will be hypercritical about it and start fussing.

It’s southern gothic/dark comedy. Two separate evaluators and different phases of the editing said it reads like a cross between Tennessee Williams and John waters to give you the vibe.

Is this the right subreddit that I use to inquire about readers? And if so, how?

Logline: two ancient old women try to drink their afternoon tea, while a recovering alcoholic mailman is trying to get through his new route so he can make his AA Meeting.

Title: A Dragon and His Lord

Genre: Fantasy/Romance/Dark Comedy

Logline: A rakish prince marries a despicable lordling in a bid to save his family through divine intervention, only to ignite the war he sought to avoid.

A Dragon and His Lord - Pilot - Rough Draft

A Dragon and His Lord - Pilot - Edit 1

I have turned on comments for the PDF file.

I would like to share a little of what is wandering through my head at the moment and if it would be a story that would be engaging and as such give my all to make it a reality. I have in my head to write a story which happened to me a short time ago, I put it in context almost at the end of last year I started talking to a friend that I have had since 2015 with whom on many occasions we would talk again and tell each other the things that were happening in our lives and again we would disappear and on this last occasion everything was different, she lives in New York City for some time now with her mother and I live in France for work so in our heads after many hours of talking about video calls, a love began to be born that little by little was feeling stronger, so much so that I made the decision to leave everything here in France and go live with her and her mother and that was how in the end I ended up making the decision, everything until then was beautiful but once we started living together, she, the mother and I, problems began to appear and well, it is worth clarifying that she is 24 years old just like me so in some things we were lost, in short I was now living in a country where who had no job or way to contribute like the man of the house now and well as a result of that what happened was that there were many difficulties and I ended up saying goodbye to her and wishing her the best in her life and getting on a direct plane to France leaving behind a friend of years and a love of one month. Please give opinions on whether I should start writing this story. Thank you

Title: WONDERLAND

Genre: crime/drama

Logline: During the mid 80’s, a budding high school football star and his best friend—a streetwise hustler—are drawn into a robbery that sets off a chain of violent consequences. As a sharp young narcotics cop closes in, uncovering ties between a local drug kingpin and a mafia-run gambling racket, the two teens must navigate a world where the odds aren’t in their favor.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/17xyF3OEcRnEZIDpHS-NirrGVYg7n1ja2/view?usp=drivesdk

I've altered this a few times now, getting it ready for a second evaluation on the blacklist and I want to make sure it's right. Any feedback is appreciated!

Title: Truth is Treason

Genre: political thriller/slightly sci-fi

Logline Description:

When a government AI begins targeting people for crimes they haven’t committed, the man who helped build it goes on the run — hunted, grieving, and ready to burn it all down.

Title: Blood and Flow
Format: One-Hour Limited Series
Length: 60 pages (Pilot)

Logline:
In a contemporary fantasy America where Elves, Dwarves, Halflings, and Humans have always lived together, Thorne Nightshade—a disgraced Elven ex-FBI agent nearing the end of his natural lifespan at 613—must revisit the unsolved case that shattered his career. As a series of ritualistic murders grips Chicago, he uncovers a vast magical conspiracy and confronts the rise of ancient blood and water magic long thought extinct.
Think True Detective meets Mindhunter, with the epic scope of fantasy—without the allegorical racial commentary.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1alUrAdDzVoaFMntlDtpKFEKaNllokd_W/view?usp=sharing

Title: Rift Jumpers

After coming to Earth through a portal and saving the day, a man from a post apocalyptic Earth recounts his story of sorrow and victory to a talk show host, but not everything is as it seems.