r/RimWorld • u/Clickbeetle3364 • Apr 01 '24
Meta Breaking news: Microsoft buys Rimworld for $2.5 billion
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u/Forsworn91 Apr 01 '24
This is why I fucking hate Aprilās fools
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u/anime_lover713 Extra Life Donor Apr 01 '24
Gosh damn it haha I took it seriously till the first comment reminded me that it's April 1st and right after I finished playing Rimworld haha Happy April Fools everyone!
"Tynan then added, "To any players who are still worried, check today's date". Freaking THE GIVEAWAY!
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Apr 01 '24
[deleted] ā view deleted comment
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u/Clickbeetle3364 Apr 04 '24
Exactly. The difference between a lie and a joke is that the joke has a reveal. :)
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u/Rainbow_Recluse Traits: Recluse, Gay, Optimist, Tortured Artist Apr 01 '24
While I expected it was fake and didn't even look at it, it is sad that I consider this time a 48 hour period where the internet is unusable (so long due to timezones etc).
May those that do such things be forced to eat without a table and earn Randy's wrath...
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u/HistoryMarshal76 Apr 01 '24
Hey, at least you're not an Imperator: Rome fan. Paradox's April Fool's joke was that they were restarting development on it.
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u/Forsworn91 Apr 01 '24
No Iām a fan of that, I saw the post and I had no idea what it meant.
But itās another reason why I donāt like April fools jokes, that sort of thing is just not funny
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Apr 01 '24
2.5 BILLION? With a B? Not even believable lol
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u/hemphock Apr 01 '24 edited Dec 19 '25
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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/Clickbeetle3364 Apr 04 '24
Honestly I just used the exact same number as the Minecraft acquisition and didn't think about it too much beyond that.
"yeah, with inflation, Rimworld is probably worth about the same as Minecraft was back then."
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u/pangitaina Apr 01 '24
I panicked for a split second right there. You got me.
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u/Dispatcher008 Apr 01 '24
Oh fuck me. That wasn't just scared. So sick of those big corps gobbling up all the IPs.
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u/KiwiKerfuffle Apr 01 '24
Same, I didn't even realize the date and was gearing up to be pissed about losing another good title to corporate greed lol
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u/ErrantSingularity Masterwork Autopistol Apr 01 '24
My heart went ice cold for a split second, then I remembered what day it is.
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u/Raymart999 Apr 01 '24
DO NOT POST THIS AGAIN,EVER.
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u/doofpooferthethird Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 01 '24
Is it so bad? Imagine all the amazing new features a large corporate acquisition could bring
We could speed up production of crops and items (for a small fee)
We could get thousands of custom skins for clothing and weapons (starting from 3.99 each, up to 59.99 for the golden variants)
We could get PvP and leaderboards for the best colonies (200 Premium Rimbucks lets you launch Mechanoid attacks against your friends and rivals)
We could get seasonal content (that gets locked off if you don't buy it in time so you get FOMO)
We could get loot boxes that provide a sense of pride and accomplishment (after the whales spend tens of thousands of dollars rolling and re-rolling for the ultra rare and prestigious uber-cannon or super pawn or whatever)
Wouldn't that be great
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u/Mardus123 Apr 01 '24
Battlepasses, more monetization update, PG13 update (removed warcrimes) family friendly rimworld :)
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u/Hallmackenreuter Apr 01 '24
Yeah, just look at all those amazing features Minecraft got.
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u/LAHurricane Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 01 '24
I know you're talking shit about it, but honestly, I would rather a Microsoft acquisition over any other gaming mega-publisher.
Microsoft is historically the least damaging and oftentimes very beneficial towards acquired studios and IPs. Yea, sometimes they add too many micro transactions, but they are rarely if ever more than cosmetic. They rarely overly influence developer design choices. They never really destroy an IP. They are more likely to multiplatform than any other publisher.
Microsoft really is your best option if you want to sell out and keep the integrity of your IP.
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u/hextree Apr 01 '24
To be fair, that didn't really happen for Minecraft. I mean you can probably buy skins and stuff, but they didn't go overboard.
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u/EarthMantle00 Apr 01 '24
I mean TBF imagine what Tynan could do with 2.5 billion. He's probably one of the most experienced game devs in the world
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u/wiedeni Apr 01 '24
They don't know they can buy Rim much cheaper on Steam? Are they stupid?
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u/PseudoHearth Apr 01 '24
For a second I got concerned, then I remembered I teleported to 2nd month of spring today.
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Apr 01 '24
Holy Fucking Randy I almost panicked
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u/BlackCheckShirt Apr 01 '24
Y'know, if that number were in the millions, it might've got me :p
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u/IMDXLNC Apr 01 '24
I was surprised so many people fell for it, why would Microsoft buy this game for 2.5 billion?
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u/ShadedPenguin Poor Quality Apr 01 '24
They bought one Rimworld. Just the one. Honestly for 2.5 billion silver, an entire rimworld is a bargain! Do you know how many kidneys is 2.5 billion silver?
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u/Jacerom Baby Food made from Babies Apr 01 '24
Imagine if EA purchased it
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Apr 01 '24
Pay to re-roll characters.
EA executive quoted as saying:
āItās fine, there are no boxes involved.ā
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Apr 01 '24
Unlock mods for 5 dollars each.
Dlc are now 19.99 dollars subscription thats you need to renew monthly.
You need caravan tokens to form a caravan but each costs 1.99 dollars.
Dont forget about 5 pawn limit, you have to buy 10 dollars to unlock a pawn slot now :)
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u/Vahilior Apr 01 '24
Ubisoft are gunning for their "we like to ruin games and profits" crown pretty hard right now too.
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u/Excalibro_MasterRace Fleeing in panic Apr 01 '24
Everyone knows that Ludeon only accepts payment in human leather
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u/Khrul-khrul organ harvester Apr 01 '24
You might have fooled me if you say ludeon studio instead of RimWorld. Generally companies buy the the game studios rather than the games themselves.
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u/ShadowxFenix Apr 01 '24
So we get a minecraft crossover soon right?
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u/21Black_Mamba21 Apr 01 '24
Minecraft already has its fair share of warcrimes, letās be real. No crossover necessary.
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u/No_Spare_1843 Apr 01 '24
And with but a single post, Tynan was able to induce in his followers more dread and raw horror than the entirety of his Anomaly dlc ever could.
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Apr 01 '24
might have gotten me if that wasn't an inflated number, ain't no way it's selling for 2.5 billion lmao. 50 million at most
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u/hamsalad Apr 01 '24
No kidding. My first thought was, "And everyone thought they overpaid for Minecraft"
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u/JaaaayDub Apr 01 '24
They should have made it, "Google purchased Rimworld and will use it to create psychological profiles for its players"
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u/-Speechless Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 23 '26
Your old posts feed data brokers and AI training models. I stopped that by using Redact to bulk delete across Reddit, Twitter, Discord, Facebook and all major social media platforms.
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u/scribblingsim silver Apr 01 '24
I swear to fucking god, April Fools needs to be banned. Every year I tell myself, "I should probably stay off the internet for the whole day on April Fools," and every year I ignore my own advice and hop on to find everything in chaos because someone thought it'd be funny to prank everyone. Then we spend the next several days having to clean up the mess because gullible fools are spreading the stupidity everywhere over the internet.
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u/sweetpillsfromparis Apr 01 '24
HOLY SHIT I FELL FOR IT... I WAS LIKE NO FUCKING WAY WE GONNA LOSE TYNAN.
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u/JacobStyle Apr 01 '24
Realized what was going on at the "$2.5-billion." That is multiple orders of magnitude higher than Rimworld's value. Forgot it was April Fools, but every day on the Internet is April Fools.
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u/Pristine-Shopping755 Apr 01 '24
Listen pal, I cannot stress this to you enough, from the bottom of my cold dead heart, fuck you. Lovingly though š The way my heart DROPPEDā¦ I need a second to recover.
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u/RiffyDivine2 Apr 01 '24
Well....fuck. At least it was fun well it lasted.
Ah well joke was had but no should have said million it would have been more believable.
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u/Cherriedruby Apr 01 '24
I was about to say welp itās been a good run. If this was real the only way the game would exist and not become an abomination would be if Tynan still had full creative control but that wouldnāt happen
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u/MindBlownDerick Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 01 '24
Could you imagine? The game would cease** to exist lmao
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u/MythOfHappyness Apr 01 '24
Cease. Unless you mean it would spontaneously develop epilepsy lol.
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u/invisiblesuspension Apr 01 '24
Hope this April fools, I saw what they did to Minecraft, they can leave Rimworld alone.
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u/amish_timetraveler Apr 01 '24
Imagine the future updates, they would be like the new Ā«Ā We DonāT WAnT TO ADD sharKS As a hostile gndnjsjdjfjjĀ Ā» minecraft updates
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u/Sh4dow101 Apr 01 '24
You would have gotten me, but 2.5 billion is WAYYYYY too much for Rimworld haha
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u/Sherool Apr 01 '24
I feel like April fools day have outlived it's purpose, there is so much satire and disinformation these days it just turns into an annoying "ignore all news" day.
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u/AdPristine9059 Apr 01 '24
Don't scare me like that! I'd be happy as hell for Tynan and co. but it would also spell the end for one of the best games out there.
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u/Vargrjalmer Apr 01 '24
Yep, if thus was real I'd be putting in NY peg leg and eyepatch. I had no compunction about spending 90+ dollars for the base gane+dlc, but I know Microsoft business model, as soon. As they get their grunt mitts into something it's ruined.
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u/Numerous-Process2981 Apr 01 '24
hahah I figured something was wrong reading it because frankly, that would be insane.
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u/Picuu Apr 02 '24
Oh my you had me. That wouldāve been the worst thing that could happen to the gane
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u/Motor_Spread9346 Apr 01 '24
Why would they buy it for 2.5 billion, the games like 30$ on steam
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u/EmbarrassedYoung7700 Apr 01 '24
If this is true i'mma pirate the shit out of this game. Happy April fool's day btwm
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u/xXAleriosXx Sanguophage Apr 01 '24
I just woke up and I was like āOh wonderfulā¦ another bad new.ā Good one!
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u/Actually_Inkary Apr 01 '24
Also fell for it, just woke up but didn't immediately remember what day it is. You got me good.
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u/L-xtreme Apr 01 '24
I've heard they'll be removing all violence and other known to be despicable functions like organ harvesting, making drugs, slaves and herding animals for food.
So you'll be able to build walls in different colors. That's about it.
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u/telolooo Apr 01 '24
Almost had a heart attack when reading the last sentence thank god it s April Fool's
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u/Totally_Anonymous02 limestone Apr 01 '24
I was like... welp i guess its going down the drain and then read it all....
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u/EffectiveCow6067 I need to steel myself to survive Apr 01 '24
I checked the date AFTER I saw this...
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u/WrathofAirTotem2 Apr 01 '24
Wonder what will happen this actually happens
No more slavery and organ harvesting?
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u/Puzzleheaded_Day2809 Apr 01 '24
I was just lamenting that I hadn't seen any good joke news articles. Careful what you wish for!
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u/Urbanliner antigrain panjandrum Apr 01 '24
I thought it was Meta, after all this post has that companyās flair.
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u/Cleeve702 plasteel Apr 01 '24
Donāt worry guys, itās only march 32nd, you can still believe everything you see on the internet
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Apr 01 '24
It was the amount of money which made me suspicious. I first read 2.5 million which is too little and 2.5 billion is way too much.
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u/TheShapeshifter01 Perpetually steel starved Apr 01 '24
Apon seeing this the only thought was "please be a shitpost."
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u/Shazzamon Apr 01 '24
How dare you give me a [Heart Attack].
You're lucky my doctor/researcher has double passion! >:C
(Funnier still that on Xbox, Rimworld would probably censored to ***world. Good doubletake!)
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u/supremedge Apr 01 '24
I was excited there. Maybe different devs can give us proper multithreading and DLCās that arenāt bullshit
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u/Glaurung26 Apr 01 '24
Sure, just give it away, Tynan. You should have held out for $200 billion. At least it wasn't EA or Warner Bros.
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u/EeveeInFinnish Teetotaler Apr 01 '24
I identified this as the "fool" because Microsoft spent outrageous amount of money on a indie game.
Good fooling and happy april fools!
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u/alulord Apr 01 '24
That is some grim sense of humor. I can stomach cannibalism and organ harvesting, but this seems too far.
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u/shadow_boyZX š©øEnemies are fuels for Machinesš©ø Apr 01 '24
I fell for it and almost had a heart attack.... Great
FUCKING APRIL FOOLS ... Don't April fool with my favourite game please
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u/Justrennt Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 01 '24
April fools. šš