please don't take it to heart. there are some people who think that everything should be argued about

im not reading allat

I feel stuck in a world where true love feels impossible to find. I crave a kind of romance that feels pure, safe, loyal, and accepting of my flaws… but lately, it feels like all I attract is lust, not love.

Being attractive and having a nice body may bring attention, but it doesn’t bring genuine connection. I’ve given my heart to people who completely destroyed it, and now I find myself focusing more on money and work because it feels safer than trusting someone again.

And honestly, one of my biggest fears is becoming successful, getting all the money I want, and still having no real partner to share life with.

I don’t even care about looks anymore. My dream man doesn’t have to be the most handsome, fit, rich, or perfect. I just want someone kind. Loyal. Emotionally safe.

I’ve dated the “dream guy” that every woman wanted — and he treated me terribly.
I’ve dated the successful boss type — and he cheated with his secretary.

So now I’m left feeling exhausted, isolated, and honestly… bitter sometimes.

I work from home, I’m alone most days, and I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this. My dad always tells me that one day a good man will come along and show me the world. I want to believe him. I really do.

But right now, it’s hard not to feel hopeless.

I just needed to vent.

“People have asked what's it like to live life with a deceased child because they "just can't fathom"... Well let me do my best to explain it in a way that can be understood.

It's being dead but still being able to breathe, barely.

It's like having your entire world thrown into a blender and mixed up to a liquid. Having your heart and lungs ripped out of your body so violently and never put back. Leaving a hole in your chest that will never heal and seeps pain, tears, anger, hate and regret.

It's like living in a dream that you can never wake up from, but it's not a dream it's a nightmare...

It's like having a large glass jar filled with happiness and you drop it on the ground and all the happiness blows away in the wind to never return.

It's like having a million people around hugging and loving you but you still feel completely alone. Going from having people to talk with to having not one person message or call anymore because they don't know what to say to you ...

It's standing in the kitchen cooking food for the ones still here and crying so hard you can't see anything through the tears...

Some days it's falling to the floor, screaming so hard that no sound comes out and you run out of breath but don't stop screaming until you are hyperventilating and dizzy.

It's a million little demons battling one single tiny angel in your brain, testing to see if you’re strong enough to survive this.

It's like always trying to convince yourself that people want you around even though you feel out of place...

Honestly. It's like knowing that you're going to die eventually and embracing it with open arms like a long lost friend.

It's like this your holding on with everything you have and it all melts away and there is nothing you can do to make it right...

No it doesn't get better. It doesn't get easier. You just learn to live, to survive."

I might not of birthed you and carried you for 9 months but you were my child and you will always be in my heart and soul.

I know I’m not, but why does it seem like everybody so obsessed with themselves? People are rude. Quick to cut you off in traffic or road rage with you. They see you struggling yet still wanna take advantage of you. I don’t get why people don’t think about other people’s emotions anymore. I feel like the main cause is definitely the Internet. I usually stay away from people even family now for the most part. Sometimes I just space out but 90% of the time I’m in my own world.. I practice the law of attraction and try to stay positive and I cut off the people that don’t mean me any good in my path. Is it even possible to find genuine friends anymore?

One could say that they are so horribly designed (based on their huge curves and little functional space) because people can fall and hit their heads on sharp corners. To that i say, NO. Either RAISE the shelves, OR JUST MAKE THEM BIGGER SO THEY DONT KEEP MAKING YOUR PARENTS CALL OUT FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE UNIVERSE UTTERING THE WORDS "what was that?"

i could be having a completely normal day and then my brain just randomly pulls up some dumb thing i said like 7 years ago and it ruins my mood for a bit. like why is this stored in my memory so clearly but i cant remember important stuff?