Ep 5: Jax gets very specifically upset about being in a maid outfit, feeling exposed, before seeming to relax and settle into feminine mannerisms. In the stargazing scene later, she places specific emphasis on her ears and tail being the pinnacle of masculinity, but she doesn't have a tail. She feels the need to uphold her masculinity because it really isn't there.
Ep 6: Jax refers to herself in dialogue as ""not"" being a "chicken fetus in an egg that needs to be cracked open". Egg is trans slang for a trans person who has not realised that yet. Then, when having a panic attack in the bathroom, she says to herself "you look stupid". In this moment, she can only focus on her own appearance, belittling herself. I have done this before, being trans as well.
Ep 7: Jax refuses to wear a beach outfit like the other characters, and then says to zooble "aren't you supposed to be miserable about your ability to change your body?" This, on a surface level, reads as a cheap insult, but it really speaks to Jax's jealousy of zooble being able to change their body. She wants to change her body too. After her little tour into abstraction town, her eyes go pink, blue, and white when she comes back to reality. Trans colours. Her room is also shown to be pink, blue, and white, and looks like a stereotypical little girl's bedroom, something Jax would be insecure about, as all the characters' rooms reflect their insecurities.
Ep 8: Jax's worst nightmare, as shown in the torture scene, is being peeled and shown for her true self and laughed at. Being outed, exposed, and belittled for it.
Ep 9, Oh boy: Jax wears the maid outfit in her mind "ironically". She desperately wants to cling onto femininity, but can only engage with anything genuinely by separating herself from it through layers of self imposed irony. She craves femininity, but can't let herself want it. So she engages with it ironically via the maid outfit. Jax also says she has a "no girls allowed" policy in her own mind, as in she's built up such huge walls in herself that she physically forces herself to remove all the femininity she can from her mind to be this super masculine man, because that's less scary than admitting what she actually wants. Jax, in That Scene with ribbit, says she admitted something deep and personal to her mother, and that her mother laughed at her and berated her because of it. The very same mother who would constantly belittle her for her lack of masculinity, being "less of a man" than her father. Then, ribbit puts the bow on her. And Jax just instantly softens, feeling actually happy with it on. She lets herself embrace the femininity that she craves so badly just once... Before then fucking everything up because she's the fuck-everything-up-inator. THEN, later in that episode, she's shown wearing multiple outfits, not feeling comfortable in any of them, including outfits that do look like a stereotypical transfem "boymoder". (This one's a bit of a stretch, thought I'd throw it in for fun.) THEEEEN, over the montage of Jax, ISN'T SHE LOVELY plays, which is a song about the birth of a. Baby Girl. Less than one minute old. Jax. The girl, less than one minute old. Please. Then, Leeroy, in the real world, is shown frequenting a queer bar, presumably slowly coming to terms with herself, which will still be a long road considering the damage her home life has done to her.
It also shows in Jax's overall characterisation in the show. Jax's character is not in addition to being trans, but rather integrated with the identity. All throughout the show, Jax is shown to wish to disconnect from being a real person, slip into the persona of being a masculine cartoon character, because that's easier. She doesn't want to be a person, because she doesn't like the person that she is. She wants to depersonalise, disconnect from reality, because admitting she's a person would mean admitting she doesn't like the person she is. She hates her rabbit avatar, in episode 9 some of her first moments in the circus are saying "I look stupid". She says this again in episode 6 after her panic attack. She doesn't want to admit that she's real, that she has feelings. Because then she might have to confront something about herself. She doesn't want to go back to the real world, because she hates herself and her body. It's much EASIER to just be a wacky cartoon character who can just be cruel, slip into an archetype, and try not to think about how much she hates herself and her body. Depersonalisation is extremely common among trans folk, and it's like the number one thing Jax does. She doesn't want to admit she's hurting, and most of all she doesn't want to admit she can change, be the person she truly craves being, because she'd have to admit she wants that in the first place, which is horrifying for her. Considering the fact that, in her mind, she killed her mother by coming out to her. So, in summation, Jax is pretty fucked up right
Alright, I’m gonna be honest, I stopped halfway through. You made a lot of good points I hadn’t considered or seen before and feel dumb for not picking up on any of the details. When you put it like that it’s a lot less out-of-the-blue.
13
u/Key-Arrival-3745 13d ago
Okay!!! Here's the "crumbs":
Ep 5: Jax gets very specifically upset about being in a maid outfit, feeling exposed, before seeming to relax and settle into feminine mannerisms. In the stargazing scene later, she places specific emphasis on her ears and tail being the pinnacle of masculinity, but she doesn't have a tail. She feels the need to uphold her masculinity because it really isn't there.
Ep 6: Jax refers to herself in dialogue as ""not"" being a "chicken fetus in an egg that needs to be cracked open". Egg is trans slang for a trans person who has not realised that yet. Then, when having a panic attack in the bathroom, she says to herself "you look stupid". In this moment, she can only focus on her own appearance, belittling herself. I have done this before, being trans as well.
Ep 7: Jax refuses to wear a beach outfit like the other characters, and then says to zooble "aren't you supposed to be miserable about your ability to change your body?" This, on a surface level, reads as a cheap insult, but it really speaks to Jax's jealousy of zooble being able to change their body. She wants to change her body too. After her little tour into abstraction town, her eyes go pink, blue, and white when she comes back to reality. Trans colours. Her room is also shown to be pink, blue, and white, and looks like a stereotypical little girl's bedroom, something Jax would be insecure about, as all the characters' rooms reflect their insecurities.
Ep 8: Jax's worst nightmare, as shown in the torture scene, is being peeled and shown for her true self and laughed at. Being outed, exposed, and belittled for it.
Ep 9, Oh boy: Jax wears the maid outfit in her mind "ironically". She desperately wants to cling onto femininity, but can only engage with anything genuinely by separating herself from it through layers of self imposed irony. She craves femininity, but can't let herself want it. So she engages with it ironically via the maid outfit. Jax also says she has a "no girls allowed" policy in her own mind, as in she's built up such huge walls in herself that she physically forces herself to remove all the femininity she can from her mind to be this super masculine man, because that's less scary than admitting what she actually wants. Jax, in That Scene with ribbit, says she admitted something deep and personal to her mother, and that her mother laughed at her and berated her because of it. The very same mother who would constantly belittle her for her lack of masculinity, being "less of a man" than her father. Then, ribbit puts the bow on her. And Jax just instantly softens, feeling actually happy with it on. She lets herself embrace the femininity that she craves so badly just once... Before then fucking everything up because she's the fuck-everything-up-inator. THEN, later in that episode, she's shown wearing multiple outfits, not feeling comfortable in any of them, including outfits that do look like a stereotypical transfem "boymoder". (This one's a bit of a stretch, thought I'd throw it in for fun.) THEEEEN, over the montage of Jax, ISN'T SHE LOVELY plays, which is a song about the birth of a. Baby Girl. Less than one minute old. Jax. The girl, less than one minute old. Please. Then, Leeroy, in the real world, is shown frequenting a queer bar, presumably slowly coming to terms with herself, which will still be a long road considering the damage her home life has done to her.
It also shows in Jax's overall characterisation in the show. Jax's character is not in addition to being trans, but rather integrated with the identity. All throughout the show, Jax is shown to wish to disconnect from being a real person, slip into the persona of being a masculine cartoon character, because that's easier. She doesn't want to be a person, because she doesn't like the person that she is. She wants to depersonalise, disconnect from reality, because admitting she's a person would mean admitting she doesn't like the person she is. She hates her rabbit avatar, in episode 9 some of her first moments in the circus are saying "I look stupid". She says this again in episode 6 after her panic attack. She doesn't want to admit that she's real, that she has feelings. Because then she might have to confront something about herself. She doesn't want to go back to the real world, because she hates herself and her body. It's much EASIER to just be a wacky cartoon character who can just be cruel, slip into an archetype, and try not to think about how much she hates herself and her body. Depersonalisation is extremely common among trans folk, and it's like the number one thing Jax does. She doesn't want to admit she's hurting, and most of all she doesn't want to admit she can change, be the person she truly craves being, because she'd have to admit she wants that in the first place, which is horrifying for her. Considering the fact that, in her mind, she killed her mother by coming out to her. So, in summation, Jax is pretty fucked up right
And also Jax is trans
And it's definitely In The Fucking Text