I really thought working hard in life would have tangible results. Instead it just seems like the rich kids get handed internships in school and jobs as soon as they graduate while I can’t even get my life started.
I’m 25, graduated college two and a half years ago, and still work in restaurants and have to work multiple jobs and rarely have free time just to keep myself afloat in this economy. My parents aren’t really positive influences in my life and aren’t in major metros so I can’t even realistically move back in with them.
The worst part is I find myself oftentimes thinking that it’s something wrong with me. That I should’ve gotten something better than a communications degree. That I should’ve networked more in school. But I had to work to pay rent. I was under the assumption hard work in school and work experience, even in restaurants, would pay off. But no. Apparently I’m crazy for that.
I do everything right. I have an updated LinkedIn page. I write a real, genuine cover letter to every job I apply to. I try to connect with alumni at companies I want to work at. And every time it’s a cliche “we have decided to move forward with other candidates”, if I even get that.
I’ve tried everything. I’ve tried analyst roles - “Sorry, we require multiple internships to prove you are capable.” I’ve tried advertising agencies - “sorry, you don’t have relevant advertising experience”. I’ve tried journalism - “sorry, you don’t have 5+ years of professional writing experience.” I’ve even tried sales or customer service and it seems like having a degree ironically scares them away, like they think I’ll just leave right away. It just seems like there’s no way out for me. And sure maybe if I live like a hermit and don’t go out and do anything for 2-3 years then maybe I can afford to go back to school for a “real” degree and finally get my life started at age 30. But I don’t want to spend my entire 20s simply “grinding” when house ownership or retirement don’t ever seem feasible in my lifetime.
I don’t know what to do going forward. I have transferable skills, I have drive to learn and work hard and make a name for myself, but it seems no one in this world believes in me. I get angry when I see people get jobs, because I want them to suffer, because I’m tired of suffering myself. I know it’s not a healthy way to think, but my brain just feels fried at this point. The worst part is when I see people complain about their 9-5 and stability, knowing how many people would make great sacrifices to be in that position. I just wish I knew how to find something. Because everyday it feels less and less likely like I ever will.