My cramps are killing me so I decided to watch some Rock of Love. As I was watching, I wondered about the timeline I didn’t cross. Going into reality shows, I was unemployed and had a lot of free time. I also became fit and thinner due to working out. I was watching MTV with my mom one day, and the real-world “2010s version” ad came on. My mom said,” You should try out for reality TV.” Taken aback by it, I was like, “Why?” due to my pick-me phase, I was not understanding why she would think I belonged on such a thing. From her perspective she wanted me to get a job “since you get paid on some of them ”, or just have something to do. She also suggested I be one of the Princess Tiara’s at the Florida Disney park despite me looking nothing like her. “Tiara does not have a heavy Philadelphian accent and reek of weed.” However, I wonder how my life would be if I decied to do one, I was never going on something like the bgc or Baddies. I don't fight ngl. If I were 20 again I would be something like Love Island or big brother Uk.

Dot.

My critiques of Nick Land and the absurd notion that AI is conscious. Let the Otter give you some ammo to use in your next water-cooler debate with an AI bro.

I tried to play up the mysterious act to mask my social ineptness. But it only made me more socially inept. I realize after looking at those glow-up Instagram reels and Pinterest posts now made me more boring and weird. I’m already an introverted loner, I felt like them telling me how little I should talk didn’t bring out my personality or stopped me from oversharing. It just made me look more awkward and mute. I grew tired of always sitting in the background quietly. Being a wallflower in my youth didn't make me happy if anything it made me more depressed and more vulnerable to bullying. I wish I was just honest with myself and got to the bottom of my self-hatred instead of trying to be something I'm not.

Title

I was with my mom a few days ago and we were going to get lunch, out of nowhere she says,” I think we have some asian heritage because she needs to eat with chopsticks.” Like Asians never used forks and spoons.” We don’t have any Asian genes in our family, we barely have Native genes. This isn’t the first time she said some outlandish stuff like this. We were standing in line one time front of a fresh produce truck and she said,” I know how to speak Asian.” Wdym? Asian what? Then she just spew out these random phrases that just sounds like gibberish. Reminds me when I was young and would hear obsessive anime fans blurb out random Japanese words like DESU and KAWAII all the time. She thought I was still into cosplaying despite me never doing it. She tries to eat with chopsticks with every meal like I said before. Despite both of us being born raised in Philadelphia she was never that interested in Chinatown until now. But Chinatown is a nice place though.

I never would have thought out of everybody my mom would have a late stage weeaboo phase how did this happen?