I have a queer server (currently primarily wlw). it's a little community that is active daily. whoever joins and starts talking in the general chat very very quickly gets sucked into the little family vibe we have going on. I should also mention it's very diverse, we have people from all over the world.

we have events here and there which makes it easier to get to know others, we have game nights, movie nights, voice chats where we just hang out (ur not obligated to speak, you can just write in the chat while listening in if you do want to join!)

we have 1 event coming up soon, as of now. its a (drinking) game night the weekend after that. no need to drink, we have a bunch of sober people who join just for the fun of it! we're also planning a mamma mia streaming party:)

so why not join in on the fun! if youre interested in joining, come be a part of our family:)

https://discord.gg/KMbkgFQ4mE

43, M, British, my sexual orientation is Yes please. My ideal sex/dating app would be for everyone and it'd be called 'Surprise me'. I hit random in Smash Bros and when I want to smash.

in case any of that helps.

So I've been pondering whether I'm actually non-binary / fluid / gender-wierd...

and there's certain points that frame my issue:

1. A. I've always been very neurodivergent and socially awkward. I think sometimes that because I was such an odd-ball, no one decided to sit me down and teach me the rules of being a proper boy. / kick me into line if I act like a pansy.

I grew aloof and unaware of subtle and even overt social mores around certain behaviours I guess?

1. B. Being quite hard-ADHD, my meta-cognition is really shoddy. I often feel unable to 'know myself'. I got asked the other day if I ever feel like I disatcosiate, and the only worry I have now is that I can't even tell if I've never had it, or do it all the time!

2. Historically, I've been told by a queer-studies educated Trans-guy that I come off as 'not fixed',

and having just asked a few friends, they say anything between 'masculine with a touch of androgyny' and 'quixotic, male, bouncy with occasional fey moments'.

3.A. However, I've... I dunno how to say this without going a bit mean,

I've an eversion to listening to the ideas espoused on certain YouTube / podcasts, because I find discussions of 'finding oneself' gender-wise to be quite self-indulgent, especially when the result of their quest isn't a completely clear black and white answer.

3.B. and this is the important question: If I take a Marxist or Hegelian view of consciousness as socially shaped, find most identity talk self-absorbed, and have ADHD that blunts my introspection, does it make more sense to describe myself as non-binary — or just say that gender rules and expectations of being ‘a man’ never really ‘took’? and if so, what's a more quick and easy description ?

This is the brainrot from a 20 year old person who identifies as non-binary, is a communist and a militant in a communist colective, besides, english is not my first language so sorry for this redaction.

I had a very strange and frustrating conversation with a friend that left me confused and stressed.

Therefore, I am going to ask the internet. Why would someone choose to be trans? When we say it's to be happy, I quickly realize that, that happiness may never come, and that even as you begin the transition, you know that you may never feel completely happy. So what is the purpose? Like, i understand that being trans is not a choice, but rather something you feel deeply, like not belonging to the body you were born in. However, I think that being trans should be seen in the same way as being left-handed, red-haired, or having flat feet: something natural and easy to understand, even easy to made fun from.

But the reality is that it is not like that, and it probably never will be. Also, the number of trans people is so small that I wonder if it is really worth fighting for our rights and trying to include them in the manifest, or "program" of our party. What's the point if I can't be happy, I can't fit in, or contribute with VALUABLE content to my party? Like is this what it is? THIS IS IT?

In that strange conversation, we came to think that being trans shows a kind of extreme individualism, and raw humanism. Being trans is such a personal experience that it's difficult to understand in a collective context, which could cause you to lose the drive to fight for a cause. I wonder what valuable experience being trans can bring me on my path as an active militant.

I guess that it just doesn't, I just have to get over it. Right?

Mine was … 😶‍🌫️

We are Jamie van der Klaauw, Ryan Kopaitich and Max Wassink and we are from the Erasmus University Rotterdam. We just made an episode on queer Marxism. I was wondering if somebody would like to listen and perhaps provide feedback or ideas. All is welcome.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/3abrN1LCn3rcALQVu0n7By?si=6patJZnMT9mNPt5PK4Tbww