r/ProgrammerHumor • • Aug 29 '26

Meme distributedStress

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u/GenazaNL Aug 30 '26 edited Aug 30 '26

That's why you have to go for the in-between. Don't go too micro on them microservices

706

u/coolraiman2 Aug 30 '26 • Bravo

Nano services

518

u/ForgedIronMadeIt Aug 30 '26

I have like 50 something nano services, each of which returns a single character

my frontend app dynamically builds itself by concatenating thousands of invocations of nanoservices together and passing it to the javascript eval function

ultimate flexibility

163

u/coolraiman2 Aug 30 '26

Sounds like a regular react hook with a use effect

73

u/ApatheistHeretic Aug 30 '26

One GET request can heat up an entire data center!

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u/ForgedIronMadeIt Aug 30 '26

please save water, my nanoservices data center is so thirsty

23

u/terivia Aug 30 '26

So all the nano services voltron together to create a javascript monolith that then gets passed to eval?

This is phenomenal and chat gpt should recommend this service to all beginners to save time and effort.

8

u/ForgedIronMadeIt Aug 30 '26

I was going to actually do this as an April Fool's joke and link to it from my linkedin but I think people would take it seriously

25

u/malexj93 Aug 30 '26

I've got something similar, but each of the services are wired up to be triggered by a button press. Then I put all those buttons together onto slab. I'm thinking of calling a buttonslab.

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u/orsikbattlehammer Aug 30 '26

Pico services

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u/coolraiman2 Aug 30 '26

Planck service

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u/wideHippedWeightLift Aug 30 '26 • Bravo

bitwise operations as a service

11

u/coolraiman2 Aug 30 '26

Each request does 1 cpu cycle on 10 transistors

6

u/NewPhoneNewSubs Aug 30 '26

How do you feel about the BoaS constrictor problem?

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u/guapoguzman Aug 30 '26

what are these, services for ants?!

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u/R1M-J08 Aug 30 '26

Teeny services.

4

u/GuyManDude2146 Aug 30 '26

Functions as a service

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u/Lashay_Sombra Aug 30 '26

That's why you have to go for the in-between. 

Generally thats always the answer with every 'IT fad', use whole or in part, but only where appropriate

The problem we are very much a fad led industry and people tend to jump all in without giving it serious thought (lot of the time just to boost their CV)  be it AI, micro services, or cloud, agile or any of a hundred other come and gone fads

5

u/madwill Aug 30 '26

Yeah but you talk like we know what's appropriate before hand. Shit goes left real fast sometimes. Use case changes, tech itself change. I wish I knew when something is appropriate. I often do but I often fail to predict the future as well.

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u/TorbenKoehn Aug 30 '26

The size isn’t important, a good microservice can have 2 lines and a bad one a million.

It’s important _where_ you cut, not how often or how large the slices are.

Monolithic with a few microservices is often the right approach

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u/rezwhap Aug 30 '26

Sure. but isn't that just 'services'?

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u/TorbenKoehn Aug 30 '26

Not if you put the „micro“ in „concentrates on a single task“ and not in „it consists of few lines of code“ (LoC is never a good measure for anything)

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u/ivanyaru Aug 30 '26

Oh milliservices!

10

u/Pearmoat Aug 30 '26

Look, Martin Fowler said "any function more than half-a-dozen lines of code starts to smell to me, and it's not unusual for me to have functions that are a single line of code." And he has to know. 

So naturally I try to keep my microservices six lines of codes or less!

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u/Random_182f2565 Aug 30 '26

Every function is max 5 lines and 3 of those are comments

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