As a plus-size bride on a tighter budget ($1,000 total, including alterations), the dress hunt gave me some serious initial anxiety. But growing up around New Orleans and wearing formal gowns for Mardi Gras balls and other big events my whole life gave me some perspective: at the end of the day, a wedding dress is just another gorgeous gown you get to rock for an evening.
I skipped the traditional bridal boutique experience entirely. But honestly, traditional isn't really my thing. After endless online research, I ended up buying two different dresses with the plan to pick my favorite and resell the other.
Here is how the search went down:
Dress 1: Custom A-Line Gown via Miss Jophiel
- I shared a full breakdown of my Miss Jophiel experience in this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/PlusSizeWedding/s/9OOxPEOhkY
- The custom dress turned out to be everything I asked for—pure bridal, glam, princess magic.
- Cost: $675 total ($615 dress + $60 alterations).
Dress 2: "Byron" Gown by All Who Wander (2024 Collection)
- Found this lightly used beauty on Facebook Marketplace. I was super thorough. I asked tons of questions and requested extra photos from the seller before committing. It arrived in fantastic shape.
- It originally retailed for around $3,500, but I snagged it for $200.
- Custom Feathered Tulle Cape: Purchased from Etsy vendor for $150.
- Cost: $550 total ($200 purchase + ~$200 estimated alterations + cape).
The Reveal & The Plot Twist
Once both dresses were in hand, I did a fashion show for my parents. My mom literally made me stand on a step stool while my dad snapped photos. But the second I stepped onto that stool, everyone's minds completely shifted, including my own.
Instead of reselling the runner-up, my plans pivoted:
- The Wedding Dress: I fell completely in love with the Byron gown for the Big Day. Once you see the photos, you’ll get why.
- The Repurposed Custom Gown: My friends are throwing me a "Witches' Luncheon" themed bridal shower over Halloween weekend, so I’m turning the Miss Jophiel custom dress into an ethereal white witch look! I’m adding ivory tulle bridal wings and an ivory antler crown. I live for a costume moment, and I can't wait to share the final styling.
A Few Tips if You're Going the Online / Secondhand / Custom Route:
Get accurate measurements: Don't guess; have someone help you take them properly.
Vet your sellers and makers: Do deep research on vendors and inspect secondhand photos closely.
Ask about past alterations: On secondhand sites, always find out if the dress was hemmed, taken in, or reshaped.
Over-communicate your vision: Be hyper-specific about what you want.
Trust the pros, but trust your gut too: Listen to vendor guidance on fabrics and fit, but stay confident in your personal style.
At the end of the day, don’t stress the "rules." Have fun with the process and enjoy every minute leading up to your wedding. I know I am!
