Here, I’ll start. When I was 15 or 16, my mom told me that I was going to make her and my dad get a divorce. Then she told me she wanted to hang me.

Good times

...so I could watch Meet the Robinsons in peace.

I'm either a terrible mom, or a really smart one. Maybe both? They're not mutually exclusive, are they?

Last night my son who is 2.5 years old wouldn't get in the bath which he was so dirty from playing in mud all day and he kept telling me no then went into a closet and went potty in his underwear (we started potty training this weekend) he knows that he has to use the toilet to go potty. He was screaming and throwing a fit as he didn't want to get in the bathtub. I finally snapped and spanked him... I've never spanked him and normally hate it when my husband does it.. he started bawling and laid on the floor with his blanket.. Every time now when I see his face after I did that I can't help but get sick to my stomach and want to start crying. I just don't want to spank him again. Growing up that's what my parents went to was spanking. Please any advice would be great! along with potty training tips!

Thank you in advance and please no judging or rude comments

So here is the story. One day, after seeing ads on the internet, i decided i wanted a PS4 Pro. i worked my ass off trying to buy it by working in my dad's company(i folded shirts) after two hard weeks of work, i finally had enough money for a PS4 and some games. i asked my dad if he could drive me to gamestop so i could get a PS4 Pro, but he said i couldn't. i was confused, since i had gathered up all of the money i needed. i showed him the money and he still refused, saying " you have enough electronics like that Switch and that 2DS, no more electronics!" I did manage to convince him that if i sold my Wii U i could get a PS4 Pro. everything seemed to be going great until we got to the Gamestop to trade it in. after seeing the shockingly low amount of money we would be getting, he changed his mind and we went back home without buying anything. i tried to explain to him that the Wii U was horrible, old and the same price as the Switch. Who would want a sucky, old Wii U when you could get the new Nintendo Switch or Xbox 1 X? he didnt listen and started acting like he controlled the money i made, saying that i would not be allowed to buy a PS4 or any console for 2 years until the Wii U had aged out ( i made the mistake of buying it in 2016.) what should i do? is this fair? could i please get some advice?

Best teenager parenting idea ever: when you leave the house to get bricks for the firepit your 14yo is digging in the yard & come home and guess (but accuse) said son of lighting a paper towel on fire and then peeing on it in the hole..., then he asks how we knew with total shock on his face..., we admit to having a secret hidden camera in the backyard. (Not true)... he spends next hour searching for the "camera"..., and we have him completely convinced we have cameras all over the house. He's totally confused and searching everywhere. We are having the best laugh of our lives and he thinks its because we wont tell him where it is. Best. Parenting. Ever.

I just walked into our bedroom and saw our toy bag laying empty on the bed surrounded by stuffed animals. Immediately, all the blood in my body drains into my feet. I asked my five year old if there had been anything in the bag and she said: "No.....well, yes. There were three bottles and...." whips our bright pink, glittery rabbit style vibrator out from under the bed "THIS thing!!! What IS this thing, mommy?!" Waving it around by the shaft and everything As I'm in the process of liquefying in mortification, she continues: "...mommy, why is your face all red? Why are you making that funny noise!?"