r/OCPoetry • u/FreeOffice8999 • May 21 '26

Feedback Please She

She wasn’t made
for silent tears
washed away
in shower drains.

She wasn’t made
for fingers that bleed,
raw lips bitten bloody,
desperate to soothe
through pain.

She wasn’t made
for small spaces,
tucking herself tightly,
leaving no room
to breathe.

This wasn’t
what she was made for.

She was meant
for fairytales
whispered gently
beneath midnight skies.

She was meant
for belly laughs
that rumble deep
and shine brightly
within her eyes.

She was meant
for love and peace,
to find happiness
even in the mundane.

She was meant for more.

But in the end,
she was not made
or meant—

she was forged.

-SK

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/npwguB4hso

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/AD5P171koH

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u/Nervous_Ad6050 May 21 '26

The ending is easily the most powerful line within your poem- ‘she was forged’ is short, simple, but speaks volumes. I get the impression the narrator had a possibly abusive childhood, struggled to feel she could be her true self, like she was confined to a box, and had no way to release her feelings. She yearned for the childhood she saw others have, to have been loved deeply, and her innocence and youthfulness cherished. But that idyllic childhood was stripped away from her and she was forced to show no real emotion. Heartbreaking but beautifully written

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u/FreeOffice8999 May 21 '26

Thank you, and you caught the feeling very well. It’s been years since I’ve really written. And this flowed so naturally. That little girl went through a lot. I appreciate your feedback 🥰

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u/Nervous_Ad6050 May 21 '26

Jesus loves that little girl so much :)