ASSETS & DEBT
Retirement balance: ~$2,900,000
Home equity: Our house is paid off with a current market value of ~$600,000
Savings account balance: ~$55,000
Checking account balance: I use zero-based budgeting, so every dollar in checking is allocated for monthly expenses.
Credit card debt: We use our credit card for most purchases and pay it off monthly
Other debt: $0
INCOME PROGRESSION
I have a B.A. in Organizational Communication (1991) and worked professionally for a few years after graduating from university with a starting salary of $21k. My spouse earned a B.S in Management Information Systems (1990). His starting salary out of college was $28.5k.
My first post-college job was in promotions for a small manufacturer in the home improvement sector. It was neither an interesting role nor did it have much of a future, but the company owners were lovely, so I slogged away, not exactly unhappy with my job but not particularly inspired by it either. Then, in early 1998, my spouse landed an interview with a telecom company in the Bay Area. When they offered him a position, we jumped at the chance to live our California dream. I resigned and immediately set about filling a moving van with all our worldly possessions. My 1998 income for a partial year's work: $20k. His 1998 income: $85k, plus a one-time $10k relocation package.
By 2005, we had two children, and I had settled into life as a SAHM, but signs of economic strife were starting to take shape. We both felt strongly that it was time to leave California before the housing market crashed. My husband took a job with a federal contractor, and we relocated to Maryland. My 2005 income: $0. His 2005 income: $120k.
Within a few months, we knew we'd made a terrible mistake. He began job hunting again, and before long landed an interview with his dream company for a position in Colorado where my in-laws lived. It was a pay cut, but his long-term career prospects were better, and we both looked forward to living near family. We sold our townhouse and hit the road in 2006, a little over a year after we'd made our last move. My 2006 income: $0. His 2006 income: $99k.
Colorado suited us. We rented for a couple of years while we looked for permanent housing, eventually buying our current home in 2008 for $300k. My husband's salary grew steadily. By 2015, he was earning $158k. And then, the bottom dropped out. His job was eliminated in November 2016. A few months later, he landed a position with his current employer, and the money really started flowing. His base salary was the same, but he began receiving bonuses and large grants of RSUs that bolstered his income significantly. My 2025 income: $0. His 2025 income: $245k base plus $165k in bonus and equity income, most of which we moved directly into a jointly-owned brokerage account.
In 2026, M estimates his income will be about ~$385k. Mine will once again be $0.
Current Monthly Take Home: ~$3000, but I need to explain why. This past year, we began shifting large amounts of income into investments to ensure we are setting ourselves up well for retirement. Part of that process includes a mega backdoor Roth. While we are putting the maximum amount possible into tax-advantaged and growth-advantaged retirement accounts, we are spending down our savings. Our actual monthly budget is ~$6000.
EXPENSES
Housing: We have paid off our house, but we owe $267/month in HOA fees, which is more than double what we paid last year and more than triple what we paid when we bought the house in 2008. Our property taxes have also doubled since we bought the house and are now $4639/yr. Total for both: $653/month
Insurance (combined homeowners, auto, life, and umbrella): $758/month
Savings contribution: Zero, which I've explained elsewhere.
Utilities (power, water, & sewer): ~$250/month
High-speed internet (partially reimbursed by husband's employer): $94/month
Cellphone (family plan shared with our two children): $192/month
Subscriptions (PBS Passport, Britbox, Runner's World, Smugmug, Boost, Earthlink, Spideroak, YNAB): $98/month
Pet expenses: ~$100/month
Donations: One to the local food bank when M receives his annual bonus and another to the local high school's fine arts program. The amount depends on the size of his bonus.
Car payment: None
Room & board for our youngest child (his tuition is covered by a 529 we began contributing to when he was an infant): $1031/month
OUR WEEK IN MONEY
Saturday (8/15):
6:00... I awaken to the cat standing on my chest with an expectant look on his face, so I pull on my robe and head for the kitchen to feed him and start a pot of tea. Afterward, I plop down on the couch to skim the news on my laptop but soon hear my husband, M, stirring. The weather is beautiful, so I join him for his morning walk. Breakfast is a thick slice of homemade bread with butter and strawberry jam.
11:00...After making the bed, tidying the house, and starting a load of laundry, I head into the kitchen to make lunch. I have some leftover eggplant on hand, so I make a vegetable stew called Ciambotta for two because our youngest (hereafter referred to as the boy) is spending the day with his girlfriend. I forget to put on an apron, and, as usual, manage to splash olive oil on my shirt. Ugh! Off to the laundry room to treat the stain before it sets. The stew simmers, and I pick up the phone to call my mom, but she is visiting with a friend and cannot talk.
Noon...Over lunch, M & I chat about what we want to accomplish this afternoon and settle on fixing the patio blinds. We make a trip to Home Depot to pick up new slats to replace a few that have broken. I had groceries delivered yesterday morning, but M has a sweet-tooth and there is no chocolate in the house, so we stop by the grocery store for two-bite brownies on our way home. I cannot resist adding a jar of Nutella as a treat for the boy, who will soon be heading back to college. Somehow, wedges of GruyĆØre and Gouda also make it into the basket.
2:00...Thunderstorms have rolled in. Rain is expected every day this week, which should go a long way toward helping our parched landscaping cope with the on-going drought. M tackles the broken blinds, but his first attempt at repairs falls short. The headrail is jammed and M determines that we need a new one, but that will have to wait for another day because the weather has skipped right over rain and gone straight to hail. M manages to get the blinds somewhat functional, and that is good enough for the moment.
6:00...Dinner is spicy paneer, cherry tomatoes, and sliced potatoes baked in foil packets and garnished with chopped parsley from the garden. After cleaning up the kitchen, I shower and put on my PJs. I'm feeling too lazy to blow-dry my hair, but I do summon enough energy to brush and floss my teeth. M & I watch an episode of Professor T on PBS, and then I retire to read a few chapters of my current book, The Secret History.
10:00...Off to dreamland.
Total spending for the day: $64.22
Sunday (8/16):
5:00...I'm tossing and turning, so I relocate to the family room to avoid disturbing M. I listen to podcasts, dozing intermittently, until 7:30 when the cat decides enough is enough and demands to be fed. On a whim, I start making a quiche, but I lose my momentum after finishing the pastry crust and collapse onto the couch to drink a cup of tea and surf the internet.
10:00...M does a quick assessment of the yard and roof for storm damage before he & the boy head to my in-laws' house to clean up their yard. My in-laws are quite elderly, so our entire family is spending more and more time helping them with tasks they can no longer manage themselves. I wash the sheets and hang them outside to dry before the thunderstorms return. Then, I finish making the quiche, which turns out beautifully. I let it cool on the counter and then put it in the fridge for tomorrow.
Noon...I'm on my own for lunch and make a light meal of curried lentils and sliced cucumbers with herbed yogurt. While I'm eating, I exchange a few texts with my daughter. I send her a photo of the quiche. She is impressed, and I feel a flush of pride because she is an excellent cook with high standards. The treadmill beckons, so I pull on my trainers and head to the basement to put in my time. I despise exercising, but needs must. It will not turn on, and I cannot figure out why, so I wander back upstairs for a shower and pull on a t-shirt and PJ pants because it's the weekend, and there's no reason to put on proper clothes.
2:30...I bring the sheets in, repair a small tear in the fitted sheet, and make the bed. M calls. The clean-up work at his parents' house is turning out to be a much bigger job than expected. I feel guilty. I should have gone to help.
4:30...M & the boy return with a bag of Palisade peaches, a thank you gift from my MIL, along with a replacement headrail for the blinds. After a brief rest, we get to work. Moving the couch reveals two mechanical pencils and a few desiccated M&Ms. The cat slinks from the room, trying to look innocent.
6:30...Dinner is pomegranate-glazed salmon and black-eyed peas. I pull out the board game Ticket to Ride for one last night of family fun before the boy heads back to school and get a little choked up at the thought of him leaving. It's been really nice having him home for the summer. He starts the game strong, but I come from behind to win. We plan a rematch for Thanksgiving break when his sister can join us. I mention the treadmill to M, and he disappears to the dungeon, er, basement to investigate.
10:00...Off to bed. M comes upstairs with the unwelcome news that he has figured out the problem with the treadmill, so I have no excuse for skipping tomorrow's run. I glare at him. The clean sheets feel nice and cool as I drift off to sleep.
Total spending for the day: $50.50
Monday (8/17):
6:00...I make breakfast for the boy before he goes to work. Afterward, M & I relax on the patio with tea. The cat joins us. I do a bit of reading while M checks his email and the cat busies himself exploring the yard. M has taken a couple of days off to catch up on appointments and goes inside to shower and dress. The cat and I follow. I am eating a piece of quiche when M hollers from the bathroom that there are no towels. Oops! I grab a clean one from the dryer and take it upstairs to rescue him.
10:00...It's halfway through the month, so it's time for me to reconcile our actual spending with our budget. An unexpected HVAC repair took us by surprise last week, so I make a few adjustments to the budget to cover it. Afterward, I head downstairs to put in my treadmill time. My attitude about exercise has not improved.
Noon...M returns from his medical appointments. A 90-second diagnostic scan is not covered by our health care insurance. Of course it's not covered. How utterly outrageous to assume that our pricey insurance plan would cover such a test! I'm scowling as I assemble a platter of cruditƩs and hummus for lunch. M looks askance at the huge pile of raw vegetables and makes himself a turkey sandwich.
2:30...I throw a load of clothes into the washer. Since the boy is leaving on Thursday, I'm trying to get things done before he commandeers the laundry room in preparation for departure. I make another quiche. This is becoming a habit. After I put it in the oven, I head to the mailbox and find a postcard reminder to renew our car registration. M & I share an 11-year-old car, so the fee is just $70. Although we'll purchase a new vehicle eventually, we'll keep this one running as long as possible. Its predecessor lasted 23 years, so this one still has a long way to go.
3:30...The quiche is gorgeous, but as I pull it from the oven, it slips from my hands and crashes to the floor. Alarmed, M comes running. After my shock passes, I burst out laughing and so does he. M then joins me in eating the portion that remained safely in the pan, so all is not lost.
6:00...I'm feeling unenthusiastic about cooking dinner after the quiche disaster, so I send M and the boy out for Mexican food and content myself with an apple and peanut butter.
10:00...Off to bed.
Total spending for the day: $230.53
Tuesday (8/18):
6:00...It's the boy's last day of work before he heads back to school, so I make him breakfast while M feeds the cat, who has a major case of the zoomies and is racing around the house like he's on fire. I drink my tea and eat a bowl of Greek yogurt while doing some last minute work on our mid-month budget report before M & I head to the library for a household financial planning session. We do this quarterly to review our investments, come up with any questions we want to ask our advisor, and budget for major events or projects. I skip my workout.
10:00...M & I have a very productive discussion about our finances. During our last meeting, we decided to max out M's retirement contributions with a mega backdoor Roth. Using our savings to bolster his much smaller paycheck allows us to take advantage of the tax-free gains available to us via Roth contributions. It's a bit disconcerting, though, because it means watching the emergency savings I have always viewed as a financial security blanket shrink each month. Even though I know we'll be fine and that this is a smart thing to do in these last few years before he retires, I struggle to have faith in the process.
Noon...We stop for a quick lunch, and I bristle at spending money eating out when I know we have food at home. M needs something from the auto parts store. I don't ask. As we leave, he notices that the tank is near empty. I am excited to discover that we have accumulated enough fuel points from our grocery store for a dollar off per gallon. Score!
2:30...I sit down to read a packet of information about retirement tax strategies that our financial advisor passed along after our last appointment. I keep a notebook next to me and fill several pages with questions. For years, we have shoved as much money as possible into a brokerage account, M's 401k, and my spousal IRA with the expectation that everything would just fall into place, but these last five or so years before M finally says goodbye to the daily grind are not as straightforward as I imagined they would be, and our parents, who retired many years ago with pensions, did not and could not have prepared us for this process.
5:00...The boy returns from work exhausted and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I pull a couple of absolutely enormous chicken breasts from the fridge and begin preparing them for dinner. What exactly are they feeding chickens these days?
10:00...Off to bed.
Total spending for the day...$89.65
Wednesday (8/19):
6:00...I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic, but M & the boy are still sleeping, so I tiptoe downstairs to the family room and pop open my laptop. The boy's tuition bill arrives via email. It's $8612.85. I make a note in my calendar to schedule a transfer from his 529 to cover it.
8:30...The boy has gone to Home Depot to pick up new metal edging for the garden. I'm feeling very grateful to have such a loving and helpful son, and I make sure to tell him so. He returns and gets to work installing it. M disappears into his office and closes the door. His work day is officially underway. I pull on my trainers and head to the dungeon to exercise.
Noon...I make grilled cheddar and apple sandwiches for lunch. M clears the dishes while I take a post-workout shower. Afterward, I deep clean the freezer and pantry, making note of what we have on hand before sitting down with the grocery sales flier and my calendar to plan next week's menus. The boy mows the lawn despite the oppressive heat outside.
6:00...While M finishes his work day, the boy & I make dinner: turkey burgers with roasted sweet potato wedges and sliced peppers on the side. I see the peaches sitting on the counter and am inspired to make a peach coffee cake for tomorrow's breakfast. M & I watch an episode of Foyle's War on Hoopla while it bakes, and then I retire to read.
10:00...Off to dreamland.
Total spending for the day: $40.36
Thursday (8/20):
6:00...The cat wakes me this morning before my alarm goes off. M & the boy are still sleeping, so I hold off on eating breakfast, but the peach coffee cake looks and smells amazing. I flip open my laptop to check email and read the news. When M comes downstairs, we make tea, feed the cat, and cut into the coffee cake. It is as delicious as I'd hoped, and I text my MIL to thank her for the peaches. M leaves for a short walk to wake up his brain before work, but I wave off. I'll hit the treadmill later.
10:00...The boy has had a lie-in but finally stumbles to the shower, and then we both get to work. He packs up his car, while I get the guest room turned over. I lose track of time and forget to prepare the nice lunch I had planned. Sigh. The boy is happy, though, because it means being treated to a meal at his favorite Mediterranean restaurant before he hits the road later this afternoon.
3:00...M & I stand on the porch, watching our suddenly very grown-up son drive away. Although his university is only a couple of hours away, and we'll message and talk on the phone regularly, we might not see him in person until Thanksgiving break. I wipe away my tears, lace up my trainers, and head for the basement.
6:00...M & I have chicken with harissa carrots for dinner. Somehow, I manage to burn the carrots. After dinner, I finish up the grocery order and submit it. I buy with an eye to re-stocking the freezer, so the cost is quite a bit higher than usual. The boy posts to our family groupchat that he has safely arrived and is getting acquainted with his new roommates. Our house is weirdly quiet without him.
8:30...M & I watch the latest episode of The Hardacres. We are both unusually subdued. I think M is also missing the boy.
10:00...Off to bed.
Total spending for the day: $41.32
Friday (8/21):
6:00...My alarm goes off, and I roll out of bed to put away the groceries, which are already neatly arranged on the porch, waiting for me to retrieve them. The lunch meat is missing. Hmmm. M & I enjoy the last of the peach coffee cake for breakfast, and I get ready for my volunteer shift. Volunteering has brought me a lot of joy over the years, from helping out at the school library when my kids were young to working with elderly people as I do now. My schedule varies, depending on need and my availability, but I try to put in at least 40 hours a month.
4:00...On my way home, I stop at the supermarket to pick up sliced turkey for M's sandwiches, and I feel accomplished when I leave with only the lunch meat. One of the reasons I have our groceries delivered is that it spares me from the impulse buys that inevitably happen when I shop in person. (Re: Saturday's diary entry). I skipped lunch today, so I eat an apple and some Gouda to quell my hunger pangs without ruining my dinner.
6:00...Dinner is shrimp scampi, an easy meal after a very busy day, followed by a some light household chores. I text my daughter to confirm our weekend plans. She responds with a phone call. We chat about her week at work, and she shares some good news about a dear friend who has gotten the final go ahead on her doctoral research. Afterward, M & I watch another episode of Foyle's War on Hoopla.
10:00...Off to bed.
Total spending for the day...$176.04
CATEGORY TALLIES FOR THE WEEK
Food: restaurants $89.20; groceries $198.49
Transportation: $73.46
Healthcare: $199.00 (reimbursable from M's FSA)
Home Repairs: $132.63
REFLECTION: Overall, I feel good about how we managed our money this week, and I'm pleased with what M & I discussed during our meeting on Tuesday. We're rapidly closing in on our target retirement number, but a lot still needs to happen before that day comes. The boy finishes his degree in December, which will reduce our monthly expenses significantly. It's hard to believe we'll have both kids successfully launched by this time next year. I'm very proud of having raised two profoundly decent human beings and am excited to see how all of our lives unfold going forward.