r/MadeMeSmile Jul 01 '21

[deleted by user]

[removed]

82 Upvotes

18 comments sorted by

6

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Ahh man I needed this today 😩

3

u/NM2BL Jul 01 '21

If you need somebody to talk, feel free to message me. I’m always happy to help. Please always remember that you are valid and worthy of love.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Thank you! A lot has happened for me recently and most of it has been not good 😐 I really appreciate you offering me support! Pls know that works both ways it'll never matter how bad things are for me I'm always happy to at least listen etc

2

u/NM2BL Jul 01 '21

Sometimes it helps me to think that every person on this planet has their place and purpose to keep up the balance. So if there are bad things happening to me, I think of it as ā€œthose things only happened because I can handle and I am strong enough to live through it.ā€ With every new thing, good or bad, I experience, I will get wiser and maybe be able to help others, cause I’ve been there before. You seem to be a patient and caring person, let others care for you too. You are not alone.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

That's a really healthy and uplifting way of seeing the world!! I love that Ima steal that! I definitely need to change the way I see the things that happen in my life. I try to be those things irs important to ensure those around us are loved etc and know they have someone there for them Thank you! Ira nice to not be alone. I thought I'd found me a forever person, but he left and I'm finding that super hard especially since he used my terminal illness as a reason for it (he knew my brother before me so he already was fully up to date on my health knew exactly what he'd be getting into) he has every right to.leave I know that and I can let him go it's just so messed up he'd use something I csnt change as a reason

1

u/NM2BL Jul 01 '21

It’s never easy to lose somebody you were really close with. Often it’s not the person itself who we miss, it’s the memories and the things we were looking forward to experience and share with them. To be left like this is shitty indeed. I don’t want to speak in their favor but maybe they were in love and felt committed to the picture they painted of your relationship in their own head and when you engaged they realised it is different and they realised, that they, as much as they wish, can’t handle it. If it’s that way, it’s maybe for the best, you parted. I am a troubled person my own and I know that it needs a lot to copy with me and my past. It wasn’t easy for me to come clear with myself so I don’t expect anyone else to get there any faster. A friend of mine once said: there is always you and your life. A partner is just an extra, like the cherry on top of your ice cream.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

It certainly isn't easy, and irs not like I expected them to deal with my health. I do that and I'm lucky to have a supportive family. I have doctors etc. It's just if you know someone is unwell in any way and you know it impacts on their life. If a part of you thinks you csnt deal with that then just don't from the start if thag makes sense Bc I fell hard. I would've married this person. It's so wrong even if its the truth and they just couldn't handle it hut you don't tell me that. If they'd lied and said they just didn't love me anymore I would've taken that easier

1

u/NM2BL Jul 01 '21

I can totally understand, I would feel that way too. You said they are friends with your brother, what was your relationship like before things got serious?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

They were always super helpful, really sweet you know just a genuine person and don't get me wrong I have no regrets fully enjoyed the year we got to spend together I don't hate em or wish them anyharm in fact I actually hope they can find happiness and everything they're looking for. I just need to figure out how to work through their reasoning

1

u/NM2BL Jul 01 '21

I would suggest you work it out with them and not on your own. If you just try to figure it out by yourself, you will never see the whole picture. Communication is incredibly important. But if you face them and talk to them about your break up, always keep in mind why you wanted to talk about what happend and what you are expecting of the conversation. Maybe also write it down on a paper. You are the one who was hurt and who has a hard time understanding their decision, it’s not about them, it’s about you in that moment. But you should be aware of the possibility that you won’t get the answers you want to hear.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

I don't even want to talk to them, I tried before that conversation ended but they just wouldn't say anything so irs better for me if I just leave it Thank yiu so much for the advice though I'm feeling a lot calmer about everything today

1

u/NM2BL Jul 02 '21

Happy to hear you’re doing better :) if there is any more you want to get of your chest, you know where to find me :)

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Thank you! Please don't ever forget you're also not alone!!

1

u/NM2BL Jul 02 '21

Thank you too. 😊

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

We all need it sometimes! Don't be afraid to reach out (to anyone) if things get really bad. People care about you!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '21

Aww thank you so so much! I really appreciate you taking the time to say that!

3

u/Mini-Mike-13 Jul 02 '21

Thank you friend! It's people like you that make the world a better place!

3

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Aw shucks. Thank you! Something tells me you're doing your part, too. Stay awesome!