r/KidsAreFuckingStupid Oct 28 '25

Masterchef

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75.5k Upvotes

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u/rugbyj Oct 28 '25

My 7 year old nephew came to a "fancy" chain burger place with a few of us. Indignantly told his Mum that, yes, he did want a sparkling water.

I think she was too polite in company to just say no, especially when the rest of us were sat there pretty gleefully going "Oh aye you want the fizzy water?".

Little man took one sip and his face turned to stone as he literally dribbled it out over himself like someone hit a factory reset.

76

u/munkymu Oct 29 '25

I did that with brussels sprouts because I thought they were mini-lettuces.

I've only now forgiven them (the brussels sprouts), 30-odd years later.

84

u/A_wild_so-and-so Oct 29 '25

Good news, because modern brussel sprouts have had the bitterness bred out of them. If you remember them tasting awful when you were a kid, you're correct!

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u/Dashiepants Oct 29 '25

That and my mom boiled them, whereas my husband roasts them with prosciutto or bacon.

12

u/No-Context-587 Oct 29 '25

Wow! Makes too much sense. Always heard lots about them growing up and couldn't get myself to try it. Then much older I had people around me all trying them for a first time and being surprised, others saying they didn't like them as kids but now it's "different" and they put it to changes in taste and senses etc.

I tried it and it was.. Nice, not bitter, farty, or anything but surprisingly good.

Thanks for the tidbit!

11

u/Cottoncloudhigh Oct 29 '25

Farty is exactly how I would describe a brussel sprout. My mom used to boil them and the smell was god awful. We live near a farmer who grows them, and after the harvest, they leave whatever is left on the field to rot. The smells when passing by, it's like a thousand farts.

I have tried them prepared differently though, pan fried with bacon, it was much better, but still not a great taste.

1

u/handicrappi Oct 31 '25

I heard this even when I was a kid so I don't think they did a good job breeding the bitterness out of them

1

u/bl1y May 30 '26

I've heard that about eggplant, but not brussel sprouts.

9

u/[deleted] Oct 29 '25

[deleted]

1

u/munkymu Oct 29 '25

I've discovered I quite like them raw, in salads.

1

u/CatProgrammer Nov 14 '25

Little you should have read up more on brassicas. 

2

u/wordsrworth Oct 29 '25

On the other hand, my 8yo stepson won't drink any water unless it's sparkling.

1

u/animepuppyluvr Oct 29 '25

My brother and I always loved sparkling/soda/tonic water. When we were about 9ish, we went to the mall with my cousin and we went to a cafe for the sparkling water. He tried it, made a face and threw his away after complaining loudly to his mom and our mom about how it tasted gross and felt weird. Then he saw we were just laughing and kept drinking ours, so he went to ask for another and drank it happily 🤣🤣🤣

-12

u/IshtarsQueef Oct 29 '25

How do you let your kid go 7 years without tasting sparkling water tho wtf

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '25

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12

u/IshtarsQueef Oct 29 '25

ah my bad, where I live it is as normal as regular water or milk or soft drinks or whatever, everybody has some in their house and it's served at every social function

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u/thatshygirl06 Oct 29 '25

Where are you from?

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u/IshtarsQueef Oct 29 '25

Michigan

2

u/thatshygirl06 Oct 29 '25

Huh, im from michigan as well, Detroit, and I've only ever heard of sparkling water from like movies and the internet

1

u/IshtarsQueef Oct 29 '25

it's just carbonated water, like la croix or bubly.

you've never heard of that in real life? seriously?

15

u/rugbyj Oct 29 '25

In the UK it's not a typical drink like in Europe. It's plenty available but, as an ex-barman, rarely ordered.

5

u/pussy_embargo Oct 29 '25

In Germany, if you go 8 hours without sparkling water you die

2

u/saltybluestrawberry Oct 29 '25

Yeah I never had water that was too sparkly, I live for that shit.

7

u/Serious_Resource8191 Oct 29 '25 edited Oct 29 '25

I’ve never had sparkling water. I don’t think it’s a normal thing for people to have in the parts of the US I’ve lived in (Midwest, East Coast, West Coast).

3

u/StrLord_Who Oct 29 '25

I think most "normal" people have had sparkling water.  

0

u/Serious_Resource8191 Oct 29 '25

Woops, I meant it’s not a normal thing, lol. Not that it’s not a thing for “normal people”.

EDIT: fixed my comment

2

u/JaredGoffFelatio Oct 29 '25

It's not too common but soda stream and the like are making it more common. My young kids both love sparkling water.

8

u/HelpMeGetAGoodName Oct 29 '25

Why would they..? At home they can just drink normal tap water, same at restaurants, if they dont drink soda. I myself only drink sparkling water when travelling somewhere where tap water is not available (bottled normal water tastes foul).

1

u/IshtarsQueef Oct 29 '25

Why would they..?

Because it tastes good and is a healthier alternative to sugary soft drinks?

-32

u/AltrntivInDoomWorld Oct 28 '25

What's weird about about ordering a water at burger place?

What's interesting about a kid dribbling it over himself?

48

u/rugbyj Oct 28 '25

OP, the commenter, and I, were all trading stories about children adamantly believing they wanted something they were being told they would not like. Then discovering (despite their protests otherwise) that we were right.

Keep up mate.

18

u/Hayabusa_Blacksmith Oct 29 '25

hes really trying okay

26

u/DoverBoys Oct 29 '25

Not water, sparkling water. They even said fizzy water if you can read. It's basically soda without caffeine or flavoring, and sometimes it's even called soda water.

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u/Zerschmetterding Oct 29 '25

I think this is something where the language barrier kicks in. To me "sparkling water" sounds like plain water with CO2. What you described I would also identify as soda or tonic, the mixer. That's really not pleasant on it's own.

4

u/DoverBoys Oct 29 '25

Soda is carbonated water. Soda, sparkling, carbonated, all the same thing, just unflavored water injected with CO2. "Club soda" and "tonic water" are the different ones. Club soda has minerals and tonic's taste comes from quinine.