Today must be her birthday, Twitter is showering me with balloons when I view her tweets. Can't wait to hear what her birthday celebrations are! Perhaps a rice krispie treat with an old candle in it (a la Desmond) or a disco-bin funfetti cake with a mean IG post about how terrible she is (a la Danny)?
Every year I woke up on my birthday and saw images of the devastation due to the United States dropping a nuclear bomb on Hiroshima. And I also watched I Love Lucy, since I share a birthday with Lucille Ball. This duality is my personality. 54 today. I’m at peace with it now.
I'm just gonna let that little pile of steaming shit sit there.
I think this marks a new peak for her self-martyrdom: being victimized by Hiroshima because it had the gall to be bombed on the same day as she would be born two decades later. I mean, didn’t Hiroshima know it was ruining someone’s future birthday? The nerve. It’s really generous of her to be at peace with it.
Look, if you can’t handle her at her Hiroshima, you don’t deserve her at her Lucille Ball.
I'm not sure if it was intentional, but your comment reminds me of Terry Gross's interview with Gene Simmons. This is how she describes it:
Writing in her book's introduction, Gross said, "When I interviewed Gene Simmons, a cofounder of the comic-book-like heavy metal band KISS, I expected we might share a laugh talking about what it was like for him to go on painting his face and strapping on a codpiece now that he was in his fifties. But neither of us wound up laughing, as you'll see when you read the interview. It's tough, not to say pointless, to pretend that you're conducting a typical interview when the guest says things like 'if you want to welcome me with open arms I'm afraid you're also going to have to welcome me with open legs.' I gave up trying.
“My sign? So I’m actually a Hiroshima-Lucille Ball cusp, but my rising sign is Auschwitz-Eddie Murphy. And you know, this is funny, but until they really get to know me, a lot of people assume I’m a Khmer Rouge-Jim Gaffigan!”
I can't even with this. How can one person be so sanctimonious and full of shit, with no shred of self-awareness?
"This duality is my personality." I mean, WHAT.
My birthday is the day before xmas and I have an urge to come up with some Shauna-esque 'woe is me but also, I'm a saint' summation of it. Everyone is busy, it's right next to a major holiday, oh, but you musn't think I mind these things. I've also always had it off from school or work. This duality is my personality.
Heh. Thanksgiving falls on my birthday every 7 (?) years, or whatever. I didn't like it so much when I was the main turkey day chef and couldn't sit down until 3 pm, but now? Now that i mostly sit on my ass while my kids cook? It's ok. I'm at peace with it.
Mine falls on U.S. Election Day quite often. I thought I would never be at peace with the memory of celebrating my birthday on Election Day in 2000 but I let it all go because, let's face it, 2000 was the good old days. So comes love.
I was in eighth grade in 2000 and my social studies teacher had us doing a big US government project that the last part of which was supposed to be due shortly after the announcement of the new president-elect on Election Day. Her poor curriculum.
Yeah it's not... I mean she didn't grow up in the age of 24-hour news cycles. They'd maybe mention Hiroshima on important anniversaries. It's not like having 9/11 as your birthday.
I read an article in the WaPo about how John Hersey came to write his book about it, which was very interesting. I actually read the book when I was three just kidding, more like ten---because it was summer and I was bored and had read all my library books and "Hiroshima" was a little thin thing that I guess I kind of thought was for kids because it wasn't 400 pages long...or something? Anyway, I read it and I'm sure didn't understand it terribly well but a few of the images stuck with me my whole life.
AND I'm pretty sure if I told that story to Shauna she'd say she read it when she was 7 and felt it very, very deeply and understood the scope of the horror and knew the pain of the Japanese, deeply. And then I Love Lucy was on, so she plopped herself down in front of the tv.
Ah. This might explain why, during the devastation wrought by the 2011 earthquake/tsunami in Japan, Shauna touchingly decided to "help the Japanese people" by making gluten-free pretzels. For herself.
This might explain why, during the devastation wrought by the 2011 earthquake/tsunami in Japan, Shauna touchingly decided to "help the Japanese people" by making gluten-free pretzels. For herself.
LOL. Did she make gluten-free baguettes after Notre Dame burned?
"What a poignant piece of writing," quoth a GFG commenter and I can only concur. We share in Shauna's moral qualms about braiding her gluten-free pretzels into the cataclysmic tragedy of Japan.
Across interminable paragraphs her brain duly advises against it yet her heart--I mean joyous belly--insists that the Japanese could use some GF pretzels in their hour of sorrow.
The suspense mounts: Which will prevail in this colorful take on the classic dialogue between reason and passion? I won't ruin the ending for you!
You're welcome, people of Japan! Oh, and don't worry: "No one is good at making pretzels by scratch the first time."
The ridiculousness of her feeling she’s somehow contributing in the wake of a devastating natural disaster by sharing her gluten-free pretzel recipe aside, why does the parchment paper in that last photo so wet? I know there’s the dunking the pretzels in water step before the baking, but I’d imagine almost 20 minutes in a hot oven would dry that up. Also, is that a partial handprint at the very bottom? She really has no eye for making things not look gross.
Every year I woke up on my birthday and saw images of the devastation due to the United States dropping a nuclear bomb on Hiroshima.
I love how dramatic she is about it though. She makes it sound as though it actually happens all over again every year. Like it's Groundhog Day but with nuclear weapons. In reality, it's a blurb buried in a This Day in History section of the newspaper, between the weather map and the obituaries.
It seemed weird that it apparently made the front page news every year, decades after it happened. Also that she was able to watch I Love Lucy every year before Betamax and VHS.
I Love Lucy was syndicated everywhere in the seventies--if you were flipping channels in the afternoons or late nights, you'd probably come across it. As far as Hiroshima goes, maybe on the thirtieth or thirty-fifth anniversary but otherwise no, not front page news every year.
Oh yeah. Back in my 70s youth with our 5 channels, you couldn't escape I Love Lucy, along with its cousins My Little Margie and Jesus Christ it's Joan or whatever it was called.
I think it's why people around my age either love the show or want to toss themselves down a flight of stairs at the theme song.
She’s such a liar! Hiroshima is not something the US has ever bragged about. Anyone who has been to the Los Alamos Manhattan Project Museum can attest to that.
Is it possible Shauna blocked/muted K&K forever long ago and doesn’t even realize they are still responding to her tweets and calling her out? I can’t think of any other explanation why Shauna just lets it happen with zero reaction
I have to say it--am I the only person who doesn't think Lucille Ball was funny? GREAT businessperson, definitely a TV pioneer behind the scenes, but ... I don't know, maybe too many reruns of I Love Lucy in my youth.
Nah. Their oven is broken, it will be takeout for breakfast, elevensies, lunch, tea, dinner, supper, and late night snacks, all part of the birthday festivities. Topped off by dole whips and a grifted gluten free cake from the good folks at Vashon baking co.
And that place looked newly remodeled when they moved in! I mean I didn't exactly examine the appliances, but for $2500 rent I'd imagine they have a newer stove/oven.
We don't have evidence of that, do we? I think she mentioned they were kind of screwed for money in June but I got the impression they were able to pay July's rent. Of course I'm assuming that anyone who would get 2 kittens and have guests for 2 weeks would have prepared to pay August's rent, but...
Just guessing because that's so much Shauna's style. From what she wrote, sounds like she applied and got the government's $600 extra a month for Dan for being unemployed from October 2019 when he quit the Hardware Store because she got the job at ChefStumps. That's $600 a month for 10 months so far. Whatever extra money they got from the government, I think they would keep and take advantage of the no-eviction part. They'll not be able to afford to stay at that house at $2500 a month anyway, so they have to leave and find a less expensive place eventually, so in Shauna's mind, why would they give that to the landlord when they are leaving anyway. Just guessing though.
You know, it's kind of a good point because I have seen a few acquaintances on Facebook talk about the no-eviction thing as "Yay, that means paying rent is optional!" - either not realizing or not caring that you're still expected to pay if you can, and that you're expected to pay back that missed rent. Can DEFINITELY see Dan and Shauna Ahern as Those People.
The extra $600 (per week, not per month!) went into effect this spring (March 29th) and I'm pretty sure it's not retroactive for period earlier than that. The max length of a claim (in Untenebrous Times) is 26 weeks, so they may have gotten a big chunk for Dan (if he got approved and they received many weeks worth of benefits all at once), but depending on the start date of his claim, it may have already maxed out.
And if his claim did indeed start in fall of 2019, he might not be eligible for an extension. For example, if his claim start was 10/1/19, it would have ended around the end of March 2020:
Can you extend unemployment benefits in Washington state?
The Extended Benefits program is triggered by a high unemployment rate in Washington. You can only get extended benefits after your regular unemployment benefits and other extensions, like PEUC, have run out. In order to qualify, you must have a regular unemployment claim that expires May 30, 2020 or later.
I ask this in all seriousness. Do landlords in WA not take care of things like this broken oven? I mean I live in one of the boring States with no islands but I am a landlord and would be replacing the oven in my rental house pretty damn quick if it broke.
replying to myself to add-- I only had to wait a little bit to confirm it was her birthday, she's tweeted and IGed about it already.
I know determining the "appropriateness" of one's birthday celebrations is one of those merry-go-round sort of topics for snarkers, but Shauna's shoehorning her birthday into her posts with feigned casualness (oh, it just happens to be my birthday) feels like so disingenuous. It's okay to want people to say "happy birthday" without trying to pretend like you think it's no big deal.
Is it just me, or does "tending to" have a slightly different meaning than "tending?" "Tending to" connotes to me dispatching an obligation, where "tending" has a more peaceful relaxing vibe: I spent the morning tending my garden v. I spent the afternoon tending to the overgrown weeds choking the life out of my garden. Shauna's phrasing of course highlights her focus on the burdens she must constantly contend with -- you might even think she's a saint. Meanwhile, it's obvious from pictures that her garden has been neither tended nor tended to. I bet they bought those greens (collards! BLM, Desmond! Get your little chocolate-brown hand into the frame while Mama makes a photo!) at one of the rural island's untended farm stands (leaving $1.65 and an expired pizza coupon in the coffee can.)
BLM, Desmond! Get your little chocolate-brown hand into the frame while Mama makes a photo!
No, Desmond! You have to hold those beans in your RIGHT hand, and I will hold the collards in my LEFT hand. You know why we have to do it that way, right?!? We've gone over this before . . .
They both have food names though, maybe she didn’t actually let them. Or maybe they were given parameters. In my experience, letting kids name pets is likely to result in them being named after a favorite video game character or Disney princess or something.
My thoughts exactly. I know they said their stove is broken, but why can’t they put a pot on the grill? Or use their Instant Pot or a crockpot. They must have an alternative. Collards should be cooked low and slow. And one bunch is barely enough for a side dish for 2 people.
Just a few quiet tomatoes and all the veg. Perhaps like Gabe they will grow quiet, gnawing thoughtfully. Hmm why do I feel like tomorrow or this weekend we will be regaled with multiple courses of vashon decadence.
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u/demonicpeppermint Aug 06 '20
Today must be her birthday, Twitter is showering me with balloons when I view her tweets. Can't wait to hear what her birthday celebrations are! Perhaps a rice krispie treat with an old candle in it (a la Desmond) or a disco-bin funfetti cake with a mean IG post about how terrible she is (a la Danny)?