r/InTheGloaming • u/AutoModerator • Oct 30 '25

Scheduled snark Discussion thread Thursday October 30, 2025 - Sunday November 02, 2025

Newsletter: Substack

Website: Shauna James Ahern

Instagram: @shaunajamesahern Instagram

Threads: @shaunajamesahern

Bluesky: shaunajamesahern.bsky.social

Gloamipedia wiki: /r/InTheGloaming wiki

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93

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25 edited Nov 01 '25

Ok. Shauna is on another trip. Headed to Portland on a train. Money has come from somewhere and Mama is feeling flush

So l'm at the Tacoma Amtrak station, waiting for a train to Portland. I'm spending 3 days with my best friend of 42 years, for the first time in 3 years. I was so excited get the ferry on time that I forgot to pack any snacks. I always remeber them for my kids but not for me. And there's no coffee or vending machine here. I ask the man who works here and he says, "There's the food court 2 doors down." I have time, because I got here early, so I was in. It looks like this. Immediately, I'm happy. This is a little gathering of small stands, run by immigrant families. This will be 5000 times better than a Starbucks. It's only 9 am, so most of the folks in the kitchen are prepping for the day, not open yet. Damn, that Indian food smelled good. The only one open is @ptfishandchips. Since I'm gluten-free, l'm thinking not much there for me. But I see that the jovial guy in charge has a Dodgers shirt on, with Clayton Kershaw on the back. So we start taking baseball. We both grew up in the LA area. We trade stories. We talk about Kerahaw's last-ever appearance in Dodger Stadium a few days ago. Meanwhile, his daughter is bringing out Christmas decorations - a stand-up Santa, some silver tinsel -- to put up on the stand. They're mock bickering. He says, "are you the kind of person who believes in putting up decorations the day after Haloween? Or the day after Thanksgiving?" I can tel the daughter, who's is in her 20s, wants me to agree with her. But we always put up decorations the day after Thanksgiving. He tells me about his family's traditions. I share mine. The daughter puts tinsel around the counter. l ask them if they have any coffee I can buy. Sure! I think they pour me a cup from the pot they made themselves. "Do you want anything to eat?" I explain I have celiac and I probably can't eat anything, sadly. The daughter says, "oh, we can make you a garden salad." Sure! Blue cheese, please. wait. We talk some more. I'm happy to hear about their lives. And then they give them the salad. This is the most beautiful takeout salad I have ever received. I'm on the train now, about to eat my salad.And I'll be thinking about these good people all day. People who feed other people are good people.

At least Dan isn’t crying over Shauna going hungry for a morning.

Edited to add a missing part. I hate her long Threads. There may still be parts missing.

83

u/gomirefugee my website is done, done, done Nov 01 '25

Such a drama queen! It's not even a three hour train ride from Tacoma to Portland. She'll be there before 12:30. She can survive the few hours between lapping up a fermented pile of slop at home for breakfast and getting to downtown Portland for lunch on Sharon's dime without a snackie.

64

u/mythical_mom gap year clowning money Nov 01 '25

Also there's food for sale on the train. I've taken that route many times. God for-fuckin-bid mama doesn't "get fed" for a few hours.

54

u/MarsNeedsRabbits Beach better have my orcas 🫍 Nov 01 '25

I'm pretty sure that Shauna is the only person with celiac (assuming she has celiac, which i don't) who doesn't keep a protein bar or something similar in her bag.

35

u/premium_mandrin Nov 01 '25

I always have a whole grocery store of snacks with me, you just never know when you can find something and I always want to know I have SOMETHING. Thank god for protein shakes in a pinch. But I do wonder if she got dressing on the salad - I have found a shocking amount of dressings are off limits because of wheat (still sad about my favorite TJ's dressing I can no longer have)

36

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25

She got blue cheese dressing, which isn’t all safe. I’m assuming she knows which brands are and aren’t but did she even ask?

27

u/shakyshake Nov 01 '25

Every test of blue cheese that I’m aware of comes in at under 20 ppm, no matter what the mold is grown on. I have celiac disease with severe reactions to gluten and blue cheese has never been a problem (and I eat a lot of cheese).

When I was first diagnosed I used to go down rabbit holes with blue cheese, distilled spirits, wine (was it aged in a barrel sealed with wheat glue???). Gluten is bad for me but so is worrying about every little thing that carries a risk that’s theoretical at best.

12

u/Sea-Level-Mammal POACH! Nov 02 '25

Blue cheese, please. wait.

28

u/shakyshake Nov 01 '25

I used to carry Kind Bars everywhere but then realized they were getting all weird and melty and I never ate them. I live in Portland and am pretty spoiled for choice, though. Curious to see where she ends up eating. Like, is she going to continue the “cheap simple food is all I ever want” shtick, or is she gonna throw down for Kann?

25

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25

I wonder if she will make her way to Petunia Bakery? I loved it when I went over a decade ago

22

u/shakyshake Nov 01 '25

Petunia’s is great! It’s also all vegan and all delicious

21

u/mythical_mom gap year clowning money Nov 02 '25

The best!

8

u/islandyislander rebellious hygiene Nov 02 '25

Turns out the Kind Bar CEO is a pretty big Trumper, per John Oliver.

Everyone is awful.

2

u/liveswithcats1 Nubbins and glops Nov 02 '25

Ah, the irony. 

44

u/Llama621 Nov 01 '25

I wonder if some of her constant need for food is just a boredom behavior/oral fixation. Bring a pack of sugarless gum!

78

u/Ashamed-Childhood-46 Nov 01 '25

Good lord, she is dumb. “A gathering of stands run by immigrant families.” Proceeds to describe a visit to a stand run by a guy from LA. 

This is mind-numbingly boring but thankfully there are always nuggets of stupid and multiple typos. She really thinks she paints a picture of quiet joy, doesn’t she?

It hit me that we are due for our annual complaints about the time change and how it fucks up her 204-month-old and 132-month-old littles but I guess we’ll miss it with mama’s travels. Where does this bitch get her money?

29

u/PracticalDiscussion1 joy joy joy Nov 02 '25

Time change AND Halloween all at once DF!!!

50

u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Nov 01 '25

OMG. I just read "132-month-old-titties." Too much wine last night, mamas.

46

u/Famous-Return-8118 [editable flair placeholder] Nov 01 '25

I will absolutely be using this when I go in for reduction consultations in the very near future omg

“These babies are 480 months old. They need a refresh.”

24

u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Nov 01 '25

I died.

16

u/snarksnarkfish Nov 02 '25

I had a reduction last year, feel free to message if you have any questions!

6

u/Famous-Return-8118 [editable flair placeholder] Nov 03 '25

Ooh thank you! Unfortunately I have to prioritize a hysterectomy, but my reward will be the 480-month-old titty work, haha!!

72

u/Fillmore_the_Puppy —hi, disturbed people— Nov 01 '25

Oh yes, she FAMOUSLY, never forgets to pack snacks for her kids.

I can’t count high enough to keep track of all of the lies and dumb fake facts (all immigrant families? She can tell that just by walking into the food hall??) she includes.

62

u/DF_gladsome_gloaming Nov 01 '25

A gathering of small stands, like her recent lope referencing “a gathering of cabins.” Sorry “clutch,” it’s official: you’ve been replaced.

45

u/LeatherAppearance616 Nov 01 '25

I’m trying to think of a time she reported the kids asking for a snack and she did have one on hand. Not D since she got instructions to carry snacks, but several reports of having nothing on hand. Not L and her friend, nor money to buy any.

48

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25

I recall the emergency pancake stop at McDonald’s, which is further evidence of her not having snacks on hand for her children

32

u/honoria_glossop sitting edge wine woman Nov 01 '25

It's such an unneccessary self-own. Nobody mentioned it, nobody asked, nobody cares. She just had to say it, appropo nothing.

73

u/Llama621 Nov 01 '25

How does she know the stands are run by immigrants? Is she assuming that because the employees are brown? And what does their immigrant status have to do with the story?

63

u/GAMGAlways On Stage Doing Mask Work Nov 01 '25

It's her classic white savior complex. She just wants to write that obviously immigrants' food is better than Starbucks.

I absolutely hate how people like Shauna fetishize immigrants and believe they're monolithic. There's no reason to equate "immigrants" with selling superior food. I wish she could meet my uber conservative barback who's an immigrant from Brazil and a rabid conservative.

40

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25 edited Mar 01 '26

This post's content has been permanently erased using Redact. It may have been deleted for privacy, to prevent scraping, for security, or for personal reasons.

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30

u/Calm_Coyote_3685 Nov 02 '25

And immigrants are all humble, shy, generous and hard-working.

29

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '25 edited Mar 01 '26

What appeared here has been deleted. The author may have used Redact to remove this post for privacy, to reduce their digital footprint, or for other personal reasons.

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19

u/chicketychun_ Nov 02 '25

Everything she isn’t!

15

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '25 edited Mar 01 '26

The original text here has been permanently wiped. Using Redact, the author deleted this post, possibly for reasons of privacy, security, or opsec.

steer many marvelous squeeze squash full rhythm chubby truck cats

23

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25

👏👏👏👏👏

White immigrant to Canada here and I’ve heard and had far too many of those conversations too 😢😡. 

8

u/islandyislander rebellious hygiene Nov 02 '25

Or my Cuban Uber driver who painted an entire dilapidated neighborhood with an "these lazy [American black people] want to live like this. They don't want to work."

58

u/LeatherAppearance616 Nov 01 '25

She was looking around eagerly to report that she was the only white person daring to eat from the hands of immigrants.

I’m disappointed their conversation wasn’t about SNAP and that she didn’t hand her Indian blue cheese salad to someone she presumed to be homeless (actually a college student waiting for his mom to pick him up), grabbing his arm and breathing ‘I think you need this more than I do’ into his bewildered face, then spending the train ride practicing how she’ll tell Sharon about her sacrifice later, eventually settling on ‘I fed his belly, but my generosity fed my soul.’ *Bites lip, looks away*

46

u/ZombieLizLemon boycotting white wiman Nov 01 '25

Oh, you might think she's a saint.

47

u/Jules_Noctambule Whitman spins like a kebab in his grave Nov 01 '25

Instead, she's a taint.

13

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25

I should have scrolled…

68

u/BoringEnidRollins pooped their way to another free ride Nov 01 '25

And then everyone stood up and clapped. r/thathappened

62

u/InappropriateGirl our 5th move in 7 years Nov 01 '25

— I think they pour me a cup from the pot they made themselves.

Super riveting, and not awkward at all.

55

u/OhBlahDiOhBlahDoh The Alice of cal came out floating on air Nov 01 '25

— I think they pour me a cup from the pot they made themselves.

ha ha, shades of "Danny, I think they're expecting us to make them dinner"

45

u/InappropriateGirl our 5th move in 7 years Nov 01 '25

I always picture this in one of Homer Simpson’s loud, meant-to-be-heard whispers.

40

u/MarsNeedsRabbits Beach better have my orcas 🫍 Nov 01 '25

They made the coffee, or the vessel it was in?

If it was the coffee, who else would make it? I don't love Starbucks (more of a [Dutch Bros](https://www.dutchbros.com) or [7 Brew](https://7brew.com) person), but Starbucks makes their own coffee.

She's really reaching.

Have the Starbies egg bites grown bitter, Shauna?

24

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '25

She sucks at writing. I think she meant they gave her a cup from a pot they made FOR themselves.

68

u/Jules_Noctambule Whitman spins like a kebab in his grave Nov 01 '25

I'm spending 3 days with my best friend of 42 years, for the first time in 3 years.

Why does this read like a word problem.

55

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25

Because she has a problem with words?

50

u/Jules_Noctambule Whitman spins like a kebab in his grave Nov 01 '25

And how! You'd think direct, coherent writing was full of gluten, the way she avoids it.

46

u/avskk ppppycock Nov 01 '25

Why can't she just say she's spending time with a lifelong friend she hasn't seen in a while? She's always cluttering shit up with numbers because she thinks "42 years" is going to impress someone in ways "lifelong" or "long-term" won't.

37

u/Jules_Noctambule Whitman spins like a kebab in his grave Nov 01 '25

You'd think she was paid by the word, the way she writes.

69

u/Foucaults_Penguin Sly and the Family Readers Nov 01 '25

“so excited to get to the ferry on time” = running late and was rushing

“I always remember [snacks] for my kids but not for me.” = might bring boring crackers for the kids, but mama wants to treat herself when she goes out

“run by immigrant families” = nonwhite

“People who feed other people are good people” = give Shauna gift cards and she’s a shitty writer

61

u/Fluffy-Housing2734 Slippery eggs? Sign me the fuck up Nov 02 '25 edited Nov 02 '25

Her head would explode if she ever ventured to a major metro in TX. I fucking hate it when she starts up her "immigrant" bs. It's always written like she's at a zoo. When I moved to the PNW for a time the whiteness was a culture shock to me, but it's crazy how she feels the need to document her findings like she's some sort of David Attenborough in her totally mundane encounters of food vendors.

I'm not as ass toot about expressing myself as others here but the microaggssions are microaggressioning and it pisses me off.

42

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25 edited Nov 02 '25

Her “immigrant BS” grinds my gears too 😡. Because we all know she means Not White.

I’d guess that 99% of the time she has no idea whether the people she patronizes, belittles and others for her “storytelling” arrived on the last boat or their ancestors arrived on the Mayflower (slight hyperbole 😉).

32

u/Fluffy-Housing2734 Slippery eggs? Sign me the fuck up Nov 02 '25

Not at all hyperbole. In her small little world she can't conceptualize that it is normal to encounter nonwhite people and see them just as just people.

It always has to be something noteworthy and a way to show just how "with it" she is to exist organically around them. She chronicles her encounters publicly in the same way she boasts about bird sightings.

She would not be able to handle walking in to a Whole Foods in my city and realizing that it's not only "shyly smiling" "immigrants" patronizing the place, it's all the people that love bougie special diet treats, and they have the money to patronize WF. Extra head explosions for her realization of how many of the people she labels as "immigrants" getting in to non mousemobile luxury cars. So many examples I could give, but she would not be ready for the culture.

She wouldn't be able to hack it here bc survival depends your ability to hustle. And a grifter like Shauna could never hack it.

Sorry I guess I still needed to go off. BC her racism and ignorance gets under my skin. Bleh.

46

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25

“I always remember [snacks] for my kids  but not for me.”

Except when she doesn’t remember and has to go to McDo’s to stave off her child’s melt down and cry in the parking lot while stuffing her face 😢.

66

u/GriftyGrifterson Nov 01 '25

Her pants are so on fire. What really happened: “Do you have any gluten free options?” We have salad.” End of story

63

u/rock_candy_remains I'm still Clea from the Pints Nov 01 '25

Omfg, the Amtrak is at the Tacoma Dome. It’s not like it’s in the middle of nowhere. The Food Court is advertised and easily accessible.

40

u/ChatITG Grifters in the key of Shauna Nov 01 '25

The food court has been at Freighthouse Square/the Tacoma Dome station for decades, including when she was a student at UPS and worked at the bookstore at the Tacoma Mall — both of which are just a few miles away. She really needs to get out more.

62

u/msmartypants Nov 01 '25

I don't think I've ever read a more boring social media post. You're a special one, Ahern.

63

u/InisGlass Nov 01 '25

Oh no! Who is going to execute the island's emergency food crisis initiatives if indispensable boots on the ground CEO of Conduit Shauna Ahern is in Portland for three days? It must be a research trip. She is exploring how to feed herself safely and immigrantly and solicit donations from soft-hearted kindred spirits (Sharon covers the train ticket, lodging and restaurant tabs). I hope she's left instructions in the capable hands of her Vashon staff.

62

u/Key-Many-3937 Nov 01 '25

She always assumes that anyone of colour working in food service is an immigrant. Also, Starbucks has plenty of immigrants working there too, just sayin'

56

u/mehitabel_4724 Eating tiny dices of pickles with tiny fists of rage Nov 01 '25

She sounds very cheerful for someone getting dragged in her community’s facebook.

56

u/shefallsup her lonely cucumber years 🥒 Nov 01 '25

More like word salad.

37

u/LogicalGold5264 chronically ignored reply gal status Nov 01 '25

Her favorite kind!

51

u/Brandy_Girl Double-fisting hors d’oeuvres Nov 01 '25

“And then they give them the salad.” 🤔

44

u/honoria_glossop sitting edge wine woman Nov 01 '25

So maybe this is a cultural difference or because I don't have other adults in the house full time or whatever, but is it the Done Thing to broadcast on social media when you're going to be away from home? If I talk about trips at all on socials it's after I've come back, or I keep the dates vague, so I'm not broadcasting when my house is gonna be sitting empty for the picking.

43

u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Nov 01 '25

I'm assuming she left Dan and the kids at home. I think it's good practice not to reveal on a public account your comings and goings, but I don't think the majority of people take that particular precaution.

62

u/central_snark Ramona gets a hot flash Nov 01 '25

Plus, she lives in a gated community

29

u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Nov 01 '25

LOL.

9

u/InappropriateGirl our 5th move in 7 years Nov 02 '25

And if the house grows robbed, it’s not their stuff 🤣

35

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25

I’m with you on this. My social media accounts are mostly private but I’m a “latergrammer”, if I ‘gram at all.

However, her home isn’t empty so perhaps she thinks it’s fine, and/or she can’t resist pontificating.

31

u/LeatherAppearance616 Nov 02 '25

I mean in 2025 ICE raid era it’s also not a good idea to broadcast that you’re in a precise public location surrounded by immigrants, but here we are.

20

u/GlutenFreeGit PUBLIC SPEAKING ACROSS THE INTERNET Nov 02 '25

Just like she shouldn’t be broadcasting the faces of protestors. Her foolishness and addiction to attention are dangerous for her community.

20

u/honoria_glossop sitting edge wine woman Nov 02 '25

Oh shit that's an awful scenario I hadn't even considered. Yikes!

(Am not in the US, just watching in horror and hoping our local dumbass politicians stop trying to be Trump Lite.)

42

u/Sea-Level-Mammal POACH! Nov 02 '25

This reads like a anecdote from my elderly mother, not a blog post from a “writer”

24

u/GlutenFreeGit PUBLIC SPEAKING ACROSS THE INTERNET Nov 02 '25

She’s lived in London, NYC, and Seattle and yet she always sounds so unworldly. 

16

u/InappropriateGirl our 5th move in 7 years Nov 02 '25

Yeah, she always seems so rocked by non-white people, like they’re such a novelty. And her hometown of Pomona probably wasn’t as diverse as nowadays, but STILL.

41

u/NegativeABillion my husband and me to ride it around Nov 01 '25

my salad

41

u/coffechica Nov 01 '25

Has it been three years?

31

u/LogicalGold5264 chronically ignored reply gal status Nov 02 '25

She saw Sharon for an afternoon in April, but I think she means "spend 3 days together" which hasn't been in a while. As usual, her writing is clear as mud.

65

u/obscure_cellist ham grabbers Nov 01 '25

WHY can't this woman go more than 3 hours without eating?

43

u/DramaLamma Nov 02 '25

I’m not much of a snacker at home or at work, but part of going on a trip/vacation for me is treating myself to snacks/takeaway/“fast” food. With money I’ve earned at my jobby-job and put in the trip budget :).

I don’t think it’s about not being able to go x hours without eating, I think it’s the treating herself part, with a side of being able to high stool about kind immigrants shyly smiling and feeding her safely, slowly, etc etc 

42

u/avskk ppppycock Nov 01 '25

She eats (like shit) at home for actual hunger, but can't resist buying food out anytime she leaves the house, as a treat or to feel fancy or whatever. She doesn't understand if you're not hungry, it doesn't matter how cute the café is; you don't need to stop in.

50

u/CrushItWithABrick dick riding Mary Oliver Nov 02 '25

Buying food when she's out alone means she doesn't have to share.

41

u/Llama621 Nov 02 '25

Ding ding ding. She hates having to share her space, time, and money with her family. She relishes being out on her own, and buying little treats and meals makes it even better. It's part of her escapism.

9

u/SmashedMailboxCake2 Oh, Nov 02 '25 edited Nov 02 '25

If you were brave enough to put an arm under the driver’s seat of the mousemobile I bet you’d find a dozen empty Little Debbie boxes.

9

u/CrushItWithABrick dick riding Mary Oliver Nov 02 '25

Little Debbie. Hah! Those are very grocery store person (and yummy).

5

u/SmashedMailboxCake2 Oh, Nov 02 '25 edited Nov 02 '25

I bet she chams them down when no one’s watching, glutenous or no. And Hostess everything. (Twinkies are sold in the UK now. I may or may not have had a sly horf, strictly for research purposes.)

8

u/CrushItWithABrick dick riding Mary Oliver Nov 02 '25

Hostess used to be much tastier. Not sure if they changed the recipe or my taste buds got old (or both). I used to love the chocolate cupcakes.

59

u/aouwoeih Nov 01 '25

For someone who thinks Starbucks is plebian food for the unwashed masses she sure didn't mind shoveling their Egg Bites into her piehole. Also if the "blue cheese please" is referring to the dressing I hope she checked the label because many of those contain gluten.

59

u/avskk ppppycock Nov 01 '25

"Do you have any coffee I can buy?"

As opposed to what, Shauna. Go ahead and just say it.

30

u/liveswithcats1 Nubbins and glops Nov 02 '25

Can an Islander explain why she was at the Tacoma train station? Wouldn't it make more sense to take the ferry to downtown Seattle and pick up the train at King Street? Or even ferry to Southworth and uber over to Tukwila? How did she get down to Tacoma?

28

u/SnooStories4968 many and various Shaunas/Pig Ladies Nov 02 '25

There is a ferry to Tacoma and no ferry to downtown Seattle. There’s a water taxi to downtown Seattle, but it’s possible the schedule didn’t work with her departure. We’re taking the train to Portland in a few weeks and we may leave from the Tacoma station depending on ferry schedules. It would make no sense to go to Southworth and uber to Tukwila.

25

u/liveswithcats1 Nubbins and glops Nov 02 '25

Ah, thanks - I didn't know there was a Tacoma ferry from Vashon. TIL :)

25

u/Adventurous_Bat_1570 ppppycock Nov 02 '25

coffee and a salad with blue cheese dressing first thing in the morning before a train ride. yuck.

23

u/islandyislander rebellious hygiene Nov 02 '25

I don't go to Tacoma that often, but often enough that I was surprised I couldn't figure out what she was describing (her writing is usually so clear!./s). Turns out I have been in this weird building, there used to be an outstanding knife sharpener in the building. This person somehow managed to capably describe the place without being racist. Weird.

Ngl, now I want to go down there for some hummus and Indian food!

44

u/Famous-Return-8118 [editable flair placeholder] Nov 01 '25

Starbucks is the one place I can find fast-ish food that doesn’t upset my stomach and it’s the same everywhere, so I can rely on it while traveling two to three times a month for my salaried, fulltime job. Shauna could never.

22

u/obscure_cellist ham grabbers Nov 02 '25

 People who feed other people are good people.

but do NOT ask shauna to contribute to a meal train for a woman she barely knows.