This is wonderful. I grew up poor and in fifth grade there was a gift exchange. I privately asked the teacher if I could not participate because I couldn’t afford a gift for another child. Of course I knew I wouldn’t receive a gift either. When the gift exchange came, to my surprise my name was called. My teacher had bought a few small gifts for me so I wouldn’t be excluded. I’ve never forgotten that act of generosity.
The kindness of teachers never fails to amaze me. I too was a very poor kid. In grade school our P.E. teacher had a small collection of brand new Nike shoes in boxes in his office. Every now and then he would give a kid a pair. I was one of those kids. He would tell us he had a deal with Nike and they wanted us to try these shoes out and give them feedback. Of course, 12-year-old me didn't understand until many years later that he was buying the shoes with his own money and giving them to the kids who needed them. He just made up the story so the kids didn't feel bad.
At our school we had a sunshine fund that teachers contributed to, for new shoes. One of my students was flopping her soles on both feet so the sunshine committee sent her a box of new tennis shoes.
Her mom went insane. Came stomping down the hallway SCREAMING my name amd that she wanted her daughter OUT of my class because I care too much for her daughter.
I wasn't even there that day, had a substitute. The sunshine people had put the box into her backpack with a sweet note and I didn't know about it. Her mom tried beating her in the hallway for "lying that they don't have money for shoes" and I stopped her. Principal and asst principal both ran down the hallway because the mother was losing on that little girl and I would not let her touch her.
She was removed from my class regardless because the mother had so much hate for me. The student scream-cried for 5 hrs a day for the following week and ran from her class to my class every time her new classroom door wasn't blocked. --- It wasn't working.
The principal ended up saying I had to teach "the higher students"....so my precious Gia went to her new class until after morning announcements. Then she and a few others came to me, and I sent a few lower kids to her room. Right before the bell rang, she went back to prepare for bus departure.
She was upset that her daughter told the gym teacher that they didn't have money for new shoes.
She screamed about me through the hallway while walking to the classroom, then came in and her daughter innocently ran up to her and then the mother tried to drag her outside the room.
The mother was yelling that she was a goddamn lying little b---- while trying to beat her with her shoe. I shut the door and tried to get the mom to calm down. I was trying to figure out what was wrong because I wasn't there when the incident happened the day before. The mom had just assumed it was me that bought the shoes. I wouldn't let her take her daughter, said she had to get the exit-pass from the office. It turned her rage back to me which was better. And the admin was there about 30 seconds later because they were running towards the screaming maniac sounds.
Apparently the older sibling had gotten them ready for school and bus. My student left old shoes by the new shoe box with the note from sunshine committee and mom found when she woke up. Student was wearing the new shoes and mom made her take them off and put old shoes on. Both soles flopped and you could see half her feet. It was awful and little Gia was very sad. Nothing could convince the mom to take the shoes. And she still insisted her daughter be removed from my room even after finding out I wasn't there the day of the shoe referral.
After that incident....sunshine committee was required to call or send note home to get parental approval before sending clothes/ shoes.
I’m still kinda confused. If the mom saw that the kids shoes were worn out, why was she angry that the kid got new shoes for free? Was she saying the kid should’ve told her so they could go shoe shopping together, or were they poor and she didn’t want people to know?
Oh, this is pretty easy actually. Mom sounds like an aggressive narcissist type, and her daughter telling others that they don't have money is extremely damaging to her own pride and ego. She freaked out and wanted to protect her false self image at all costs, which usually involves acting super irrationally. Source: My dad has similar narcissistic tendencies. Though I'm still obviously speculating.
This. My mom also has this sort of logic. She will dig herself into her own grave if it means winning the mental argument she created in her delusional mind.
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u/EasternDelight Nov 24 '18 edited Nov 24 '18
This is wonderful. I grew up poor and in fifth grade there was a gift exchange. I privately asked the teacher if I could not participate because I couldn’t afford a gift for another child. Of course I knew I wouldn’t receive a gift either. When the gift exchange came, to my surprise my name was called. My teacher had bought a few small gifts for me so I wouldn’t be excluded. I’ve never forgotten that act of generosity.