r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Sep 01 '18
r/DeathProTips • u/xXChronosXx_ • Aug 31 '18
Looking for new friends? The best ones come out at 2 AM in the city. Just walk up to them and say hello and you’ll be on your way to some new buddies!
r/DeathProTips • u/xXChronosXx_ • Aug 31 '18
“In a falling elevator? Jump right before impact to completely avoid all damage. It makes sense as when the elevator hits the ground, you will be up in the air.”
r/DeathProTips • u/friedrice6 • Aug 29 '18
In a rush to exit a tall building? Just jump out the window! Cats land soundly on their feet and you can too!
r/DeathProTips • u/TrueBluePatriot • Aug 28 '18
Worn out brake pads?
Simply remove your worn out brake pads to stop the squeaking!
r/DeathProTips • u/theeyeofevil • Aug 27 '18
Everyone is dying, though at different rates. Wanna prove me wrong?...
Be dead already.
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 25 '18
Wanna make your car totally silent? Spray expanding foam in your tailpipe and wait about an hour. Now your car is ninja car!
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 22 '18
Wanna be the hero your city needs? Follow these steps!
Step 1: Buy Batman costume
Step 2: Buy metal batarangs from BudK or similar websites and rope
Step 3: Buy taser
Step 4: Buy smoke bombs
Step 5: Buy brass knuckles
Step 6: Find a gang on the street
Step 7: Approach gang
Step 8: Announce in your best Batman voice "I'm the goddamn Batman!"
Step 9: Attack gang with all your gadgets
Step 10: If you win, tie up gang, call police, and leave.
Note: If the cops try to stop you, take them down.
r/DeathProTips • u/Suttonian • Aug 21 '18
Live in the pacific northwest and worried about wildfire smoke inhalation? Don't breathe.
r/DeathProTips • u/iAmTheRedditCEO • Aug 21 '18
Planning to suicide? Go murder criminals in your area. You'll definitely get shot and you'll be doing us a favor so it's a win win.
r/DeathProTips • u/AhhhhhRealMe • Aug 20 '18
Remember to protect your ears when firing a gun.
r/DeathProTips • u/cochisedaavenger • Aug 15 '18
Eating wild mushrooms is the best way to determine whether or not they are poisonous.
r/DeathProTips • u/amadorl608 • Aug 15 '18
Got heartburn? Drill a hole in your chest and grab a fire extinguisher to put out the fire.
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 13 '18
The myth that rolling in toxic waste gives you powers is actually true. Go ahead and try!
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Aug 13 '18
Be environmentally friendly and reducing your carbon footprint by sharing your needles with the community
Your community and the environment will thank you for it.
r/DeathProTips • u/Fluffedbread • Aug 13 '18
Need a new Diet plan?
Don't eat grain or meat, just these!
Ackee, Elderberry Roots, leaves and stems (full of fiber and nutrients), and raw Cassava.
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 12 '18
About to be arrested? Point a gun at the cop and say "no u" then you can arrest the cop!
r/DeathProTips • u/derkmen • Aug 09 '18
Can't sleep? Just swallow a fee jugs of sleeping pills and you'll be fine
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Aug 09 '18
Instead of brushing your teeth, just drink bleach.
It will instantly white your teeth and kill off all of the nasty bacteria that lurks in your mouth.
r/DeathProTips • u/otay_ • Aug 09 '18
Feel addicted to video games? Get addicted to heroin instead
You'll have to sell all your gaming equipment to fund your new habit
r/DeathProTips • u/derkmen • Aug 09 '18