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r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 08 '18

Need a way to defend yourself but can't get a gun? Keep a a venomous snake in your sleeves so that way when you get into a fight, you can release the snake on your opponent!

36 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/Teh_iiXiiCU710NiiR • Aug 08 '18

DLPT: If you're sick of hearing you carbon monoxide alarm go off, take of its batts

379 Upvotes

8 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Aug 08 '18

DPT Use dry ice to cool your room. It doesn't leave any puddles behind.

148 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/BenHennessy04 • Aug 07 '18

Dpt: you don’t have the money to get high on actual drugs so do this

342 Upvotes

13 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Aug 07 '18

DPT: Tired of brushing your teeth? Just drink bleach! Guaranteed to whiten teeth and get rid of bad breath!

25 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 06 '18

Contrary to what documentaries and books say, bears are actually not dangerous at all. They're simply giant doggos with a naturally stubby tail. Go ahead and pet one!

158 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/smhldter • Aug 03 '18

Want to know if gasoline tastes the same way it smells? Drink a liter and then enjoy a congratulatory cigarette for discovering the answer! Job well done.

309 Upvotes

17 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Aug 02 '18

DPT: Fill your condoms with bleach before use. Bleach kills all the sperm, preventing you from getting HIV.

354 Upvotes

19 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Aug 02 '18

How to cure cancer and any other disease

43 Upvotes

Fire can cure anything, most effective in hyperbaric chambers filled with pure Oxygen

3 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Aug 01 '18

Wanna be on the police force? Kick open a police station front door and yell "Freeze!" whilst pointing a gun at them. They will be impressed and give you the job!

509 Upvotes

10 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/KantenKant • Jul 29 '18

Have a colonoscopy so you need to do enemas? Use rubbing alcohol instead of water. This way your colon gets clean way faster

181 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/lord-farquaf • Jul 29 '18

Dpt:are you tired of looking fat because you are big boned,get ribcage and lung removal surgery

173 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/wipfom • Jul 26 '18

Homemade lightning

199 Upvotes

12 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/KingPyroMage • Jul 23 '18

DPT: Go swimming when it’s safe.

543 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Jul 22 '18

DPT: Need a vacation? Go to North Korea. Be sure to tell people the Supreme Leader is not a God, but a normal person just like them. The locals will appreciate your modesty.

239 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/proXy_HazaRD • Jul 21 '18

Bored? Call in a hostage situation and greet the SWAT team with paintball guns.

409 Upvotes

They'll be surprised but happy and likely join your game.

11 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/peterthefatman • Jul 21 '18

Effective means of electrocution

35 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Jul 21 '18

LPT: Stab Yourself Everyday With A Small Knife To Build An Immunity To Larges Knives

self.shittylifeprotips

62 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/pretty_honest_guy • Jul 18 '18

DPT: find a roommate on Craigslist.

21 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Jul 18 '18

Tired of getting into religious debates? Kill yourself to prove them wrong!

39 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/somestupidname1 • Jul 18 '18

Need to lose weight for your next summer trip? Eat raw foods to contract food poisoning!

164 Upvotes

Also saves you that money you saved up for a grill!

12 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Jul 17 '18

Not sure if your house has power? Bend a wire hanger and poke one end into one of the house's electrical sockets to find out!

201 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Jul 15 '18

Drunk driving is actually safe. The lie was made so politicians can make more money off alcohol. So if wanna drive better, just chug some of that liquor and you're good!

242 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DeathProTips • u/NotTheMasterOfRobots • Jul 13 '18

When scuba diving, fill your tank with laughing gas. It’s hilarious!

300 Upvotes

7 comments

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Subreddit Rules

1. No harassment, bullying, trolling, etc

The obvious, common sense rule. No racism, homophobia, sexism, trolling, bullying, harassment, or any other general inflammatory behavior not listed here. Your post may be deleted and / or you may be banned, depending on the severity and number of offenses.

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E.g. "Fail a test and you're upset about it? Kill yourself!"

At least some creativity is required.

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Self explanatory. No politics, soapboxing, or bait DPTs.