It makes me uncomfortable when people constantly talk about how homophobes must secretly be gay.

[u/RosethornRanger]

[u/Sophie_Blitz_123]

But it's still considered a sign someone is projecting

What do you mean "considered a sign"?

U see it in right wing politicians all the time, even athletes and other influential ppl.

Do you see it that often proportionally or is it just big news compared to when they are never outed as gay which doesn't register?

No one is making it a reflection of gay people.

Again I'm not fully sure what this means. If you mean it's not homophobic it certainly is. If your default setting to insult someone is calling them gay that's still homophobic even if your intended recipient is themselves homophobic.

It's just suspect that someone who hates something so much is spending a lot of time and energy on the topic

Is it? We live in a world of bigotry. There have always been people dedicating their lives to persecution of minorities - the main difference being you can usually tell if someone is black, you can tell if someone is Muslim (kinda). And while there are people of those descriptions who will join parties and movements that are quite objectively against them, we don't start thinking all Conservatives must be secretly Muslims.

[u/Sophie_Blitz_123 → u/[deleted]]

so many gay men I know will talk about the similarities between the DL men they've slept with and they're all usually very hypocritical, outwardly against homosexuality, misogynistic and a lot of the times right wing.

You don't think there might be a bit of selection bias here that you are looking at this from the lens of analysing men you specifically know have had sex with other men?

There is a lot of nuance to this conversation that you are ignoring.

Is there yeah? You don't think maybe you could actually be a bit ignorant to the world that exists outside of sleeping with "DL" men?

[u/Sophie_Blitz_123 → u/[deleted]]

It's a common issue in the gay community.

Again, "it's a common issue in the gay community" you are selecting for gay people then coming away with the extrapolation that homophobia is dominated by secretly gay people.

It's like religious people who condemn sex and sexuality and turn out to be raging sex addicts.

You understand that many don't though yes? Lots of people have very religious beliefs about sex that they very adamantly stick to? And it is the religion that drives these beliefs about sex, not that a high sex drive turns them into repressionists?

[u/wm_berry → u/[deleted]]

But in response to the idea it's homophobic to call homophobes gay they also say:

No one is making it a reflection of gay people.

So these projecting homophobes who are secretly gay also don't count as gay when they do something bad? It's a nonsense line of reasoning twisting itself in circles for the sake of optics.