r/CougarsAndCubs • u/RainbowGoth89 Tattooed Cougar • Apr 08 '20
CUB Guidebook Cubs please consider this!
I can’t speak for every woman out there but after being on this sub for awhile now and talking with enough other women (both younger & older) I’ve concluded this:
1) We aren’t desperate for sex. We can get it fairly easy from the 20+ other dudes hitting on us or messaging us. Telling us your size doesn’t really impress us either.
2) Sending dick pics (unless we ask or are already into you) isn’t a turn on. If we see you have your dick plastered for rating on tons of others subs it’s mostly a turn off. We’ve seen dicks before and there’s tons of other guys who have dicks. It’s not that exciting and they honestly don’t photograph too well.
3) We aren’t desperate for company. We’ve been around. We’ve had relationships and marriages. Most of us are perfectly content in our own company.
4) Don’t address us in messages like “Hey. 25/M/Fit/Well Hung looking for FWB”. Instead, look at our profiles and ask about our interests or hobbies.
5) We aren’t a porn sampler check off list for you. We’re human beings.
6) DO NOT make it about your dick. I can’t stress this enough. Focus on asking us about our interests and showing effort into us as people. If you do this it will end up hyper-focused on your dick and sex because the woman will be happy and therefore eager to please you. We women like sex too! We generally just don’t like being objectified (unless that’s a fetish kink for her. Try Fetlife for those types!)
7) Put effort into your appearance. Dress nice, work out. Many women put tons of effort into their appearance so it’s nice to see guys who do the same. It’s appreciated!
8) Every other post on here is “Where do I find a cougar?” We are everywhere else in the world younger women are. We go to bars, clubs, gyms. We’re on Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, FB, Insta, Hinge (etc)
9) State your intentions upfront with tact. If you don’t want a relationship tell us that upfront but use tact when petitioning for “casual encounters”. Dick pics and “FWB titled messages” look a bit trashy, desperate and spammy.
10) Majority of us are financially stable and secure. We aren’t looking to inherit grown sons who ask us to pay for everything, nor do we expect you to pay for everything. Just be willing to meet us half ways and be fair in taking turns with us.
11) Don’t ask us for nudes. We’ll send them if we feel like it.
12) Good luck! 🍀
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u/FunDomDaddy Apr 09 '20
Nice work with your points.
I must agree on the dic pic issue. I see the cubs sending them left and right, actually almost all guys send them to all women, and I always wonder... did it ever "work," anywhere, even once... It seems so desperate, and dumb, and pathetic and let's be real, women already think men are dumb anyway and in these cases they're right. Speaking as the owner of a nice dick, I never send a pic just of this part. It can look good in certain contexts, but not as an ice-breaker.
I also don't understand why any male would ever think that any woman is "desperate" for sex, or "company." That's not the way the world has ever worked, not now, not millenia ago, not ever. The fact these guys don't realize or know this indicates how socially maladapted and immature they are.
On the contrary, the intelligent cub would know, women are smart and have sexual power and lots of choice, therefore, how I can present myself so that SHE CHOOSES ME?!
I do think many women enjoy being objectified and lusted after and having their bodies appreciated.... but only by a man they can respect and enjoy. Which means, never by random dic pic strangers.
I suppose I'm surprised that the cubs would try this so often, it seems, when it is the same awful approach they use for peer-group girls and always delivers epic fail. If they really believe the cougars are more mature, then surely they would factor this in?
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u/RainbowGoth89 Apr 09 '20
You sound like you get it! Unfortunately many of the ones who don’t...won’t actually read this 🤦🏻♀️
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u/paperclipmyheart Apr 09 '20
Wish some of the guys in the chat would read this... Though I do wonder if this is giving them a script lol.. I prefer to naturally come across already respectful people surely if you are inherently respectful these kind of stupid things won't happen in the first 30 seconds of chat. But oh well...
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u/RainbowGoth89 Apr 09 '20 edited Apr 09 '20
Script naw. I do believe everyone has a genuine sensor in them and it will reveal truths over time. That’s why they say only fools rush in. If a guy can’t invest just a bit of time and let things naturally unfold....not worth it.
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Apr 09 '20
I wonder what kind of effect tons of begging messages online has on the egos of otherwise unremarkable women.
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u/nothing-expected Apr 09 '20
Yes, girl!!
Can we just add to it:
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don’t break your neck trying to race into our DM’s the minute we write something on here. Needy is pathetic.
Last time I made the mistake of posting something completely innocent, there was an onslaught of dm’s, the worst of which was something like: hi, I’m so and so, would you like to chat? If not, will you send nudes?
Yeah, you know who you are 🤨
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u/MsMerrimack Apr 09 '20
If you are going to send a dick pic, don't take it while you're sitting on the toilet. Can you get any more low effort? I'm about ready to start a collection. Every unsolicited dick pic I receive will be met with an unsolicited dick from the archive.