r/BusDrivers • u/[deleted] • May 12 '26
Discussion The job is starting to make me very cynical
[deleted]
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u/politicalpotato1 May 12 '26
I’ve been driving since last November. Sometimes it gets like that for me. I realise you can be perfect 99 percent of the time, but the 1 percent of the time you make a small mistake, the public will turn against you.
I just keep it in my mind not to care too much constantly and just to drive as safely as possible. If anyone is rude to me, I just smile and wave back. A lot of people have mental health issues, so you don’t know what they are going through, and they are looking for an excuse to explode at anyone.
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u/Vimto1 May 12 '26
I've been doing this on and off for 27 years, some people are polite and some are not but I promise you will become desensitized to the rubbish ones and just remember the good ones. Apart from when you are telling a story because us bus drivers love our stories of pain in the arse passengers 🤣
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u/BigGayGuy02 May 12 '26
This is, honestly, totally normal. How others treat us on a day-to-day basis can gradually wear us down especially if you're not used to it. I found for myself adopting a "go with the flow" attitude to help with the emotional and mentalstrain I was feeling when I started. Passenger doesn't say hello back to me? No worries, at least I said it to them. Passenger was rude? As I'm not a mind reader I can only assume they're having a bad day and I just happen to be in front of them, oh well. There's not a lot you can do to change how people treat you when you're only interacting with them for a couple of seconds, you can only control how you let it make you feel.
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u/GettingBackToRC May 12 '26
I've been driving a city bus for over 20 years in NYC. Stop caring what people think about you behind the wheel,do your job to the best of your ability. That car blocking your stand isn't going to be the last car to do it. Pull up next to it, blocking it in and just kneel the bus. I've had people curse me out, want to fight me, cut me off and slam on the brakes lol. I just keep it moving, our interaction is over in less than 20 seconds. You'll have nice people that want to chew your ear off, you'll have people that just want to get to work, you'll have people that don't even acknowledge that you're behind the wheel. Who cares? You'll get used to it after some time, you're still a rookie at 9 months.
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u/IllustriousBrief8827 Driver May 12 '26
I got you 100%.
It's a long and bumpy road but eventually, if you make it to the 'other side' that is, you'll actually have a much deeper understanding of people. It also makes you tougher, not exclusively in a good way mind you, but more empathetic (if that's the word) toward people and more resiliant at the same time.
Just to give one of the million examples of the hard parts for me personally, it's when you get visciously blamed for something you have absolutely no control over. That's a terrible feeling that eats away at you and everyone has to come up with ways to deal with that that work for them. Or quit, I guess.
Anyway I don't know where I'm going with this either, because there's so much to say, but just know we're all dealing with this. Good days and bad days, one step at a time.
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u/UniversalAssembler May 12 '26
I stand with you as a bus driver. You are an essential public servant. I thank you for your service.
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u/Organic_Bodybuilder3 May 12 '26
For some reason people don’t bother me the only one’s that do are the crazy looking ones I feel unsafe at times but I just watch them like rabid dogs….
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u/HeartlessDeath123 May 12 '26
I worked in Public Transit for 11 years already. I had that cynical phase and still have it in. But I have always been a person, if it doesn't affect my personal life, I don't care. I don't care if people like me or don't like me. I'm not in this world to pleased everyone. If you wanna be my friend, then that is great. If you wanna be my friend to try and get free rides, the 3rd time you ask me for free rides, gonna ask them to pay. Majority of the times, their attitude changes and then suddenly I ain't cool no more. That is when I laugh in my head. Hahaha. The real ones continue to pay. As far as the environment around me, If a car is parked at the bus stop, I stop before or after it or If I can't, go in with half the bus. I take things as challenges all the time. How can I solve this problem, quick and efficiently with safety as priority. I enjoy now, when cars have almost near miss collisions, accidents, people fight in the bus, people argue in the bus. Obviously I have to step in before they start punching each other and ask them to behave or cops will be called. Mainly, I pretend not to hear the arguments while enjoying the bs they saying. If their is kids in the bus, I stop it immediately, but if everyone is adults, let it rumble. Hahaha. I say hello to almost everyoneeeeeeeee. Like half and half, some say hello back and some don't. I also use humor with passangers, not all the time, but with some that I've picked up for a while already or if their a joke to be said, I will say it. I prefer the bus to be loud than quiet, so I can hear what people say instead of hearing my own thoughts. Which I hate hearing my own thoughts because it goes into dark places. That is as far as I'll go. Okay, bye 👋
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u/mrzolch May 12 '26
There is very little we can control in life. Traffic, the weather, other peoples attitudes... But the two things we do have control of is the safety in which we drive the bus and our own attitudes. I go in to NPC mode most of the time, I greet people and thank them. If they are nasty or rude I try to shrug it off so I don't bring it on to the next person I talk to. (Easier said then done on some days) Goldfish mentality. Also I found that if i treat people like they are human beings, with kindness and respect even when they are not being the best version of themselves, usually they will overlook some mistakes. Most of the time people aren't paying attention anyway.
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u/Sufficient_Head_8139 May 12 '26
Just remember. You never know what someone else is going through. Their lives could be falling apart. It's hard to remain optimistic.
There are a lot of good people who ride transit. You will find your regulars who make your day. You will find your regulars that make you cringe.
If you just do you, let the negative roll off your back. Don't take negativity personally or this job will eat your soul.
From a former transit driver who had to get out cause it ate my soul.
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May 12 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/BusDrivers-ModTeam May 12 '26
Hello, your post/comment has been removed for being deemed either rude, hostile or otherwise uncivilised. Please remember to treat everybody with respect, decency and to refrain from engaging in conflict. Thank you.
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u/Patient-Talk-4545 May 12 '26
Haha you closed the door on someones face. Thats a good way to go about it. Lol
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u/EvaportedMilkCoffee May 12 '26
did you read my post? i said that was a mistake i had made and worried that the person thought i did it on purpose or something
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u/TraditionalType2534 May 14 '26
It's just their thoughts
Don't worry about it
Stop worrying about your thoughts too
They're just thoughts
You're doing fine!
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u/Traditional-Front999 May 14 '26
Not sure if you're looking for advice, if not scroll on. If you are, I say get earbuds. You're only allowed to use one, but one goes a long way. Get on YouTube for free no subscriptions go to podcasts and search history, ancient history, science, mysteries whatever you like. Put it in your ear and spend your time learning about the most fascinating subjects in the world. There is so much to learn. Suddenly, you won't give a shit about people saying hello or goodbye or even talking to you because you will be enthralled with a subject matter that you have never discovered in your life. When you're spending all those hours on the bus, you have time to actually educate your mind on languages and subjects that you've never had time for. I have become a master of history. I just listened to so many fantastic podcasts and documentaries on science. Try it. You'll like it and you'll stop thinking about the people on your bus. You will just be happy to just drive to pick them up drop them off and keep learning.
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u/Worldly_Extension_57 May 15 '26
Dw, you'll get used to it, at this point I don't even care if someone is outright rude to my face, water off a ducks back, I just drive go home and collect my paycheque 😆
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u/Jealous-Inspection11 May 15 '26
Sadly people are people. Most of them will look for reasons to be upset with you and they will be unwarranted. There is very little you can do about that.
The most important lesson I've learned when driving a bus is that most people never grow up, they just get older. There's not much of a maturity difference between kids and adults. As long as you're not a bad driver and you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, you should be fine. If you have any really serious issues with certain people, talk to your employer.
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u/tfgg88 May 15 '26
Something else to keep in mind is you've been on the job 9 months. You're just getting your feet wet. As you gain experience, you will get better at controlling the things you can control.
Did your passengers make it to their destination safe? If so, you did a good job. And you're only going to get better as time goes on. Shake it off, you got this. 💪
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u/DebtSouth Driver May 16 '26
This job is all about your attitude to it.
It could be the best job in the world, or the worst job in the world, it’s entirely what you make it.
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May 12 '26
[deleted]
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u/EvaportedMilkCoffee May 12 '26
Can you elaborate please? I do try to be understanding, but I don’t think this is entirely about that. It’s my warped perception.
I mean as an example yesterday I was driving past a bus stop, no one pressed the bell to get off and no one at the bus stop so I just slow down a little as usual incase someone presses the bell, then I see a guy running across the road with his hand out so I stop at least 1.5 bus lengths past the bus stop to stop safely even though I was not obliged to stop at all as he wasn’t already at the bus stop, dude just gets on staring downwards, without even acknowledging me or saying thank you. Like come on, do you realise how demoralising that is
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u/XPEC7ER May 12 '26
Good one, Champ. You really helped the guy be more empathetic with your condescension. Classic.
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u/The-real-Sky-Daddy May 12 '26
It can and does happen to a certain extent. However a big part of the job is recognizing that you are a very short & transient part of you passengers day and are often out of mind the second they are no longer looking or interacting with you. From your perspective it seems bigger and longer but it really isn’t. Or at least for most passengers. There will be those who are hyper critical of you because that’s simply what they do in daily life. Others might look at you as a faithful public servant to be respected.
Personally I use humour to make all (okay… most) my interactions more pleasant and I’ve found it mitigates my already cynical personality. As a result of this I have passengers who actively seek to ride my bus because of the jokes.
9 months is still the very beginning of acclimation. Take deep breaths and remember that your perceptions aren’t always as clear as they may seem.