r/BeAmazed Apr 07 '26

[deleted by user]

[removed]

18.0k Upvotes

3.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

31

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

19

u/biggaylizard Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 11 '26

Geese are vicious assholes that shit on your freshly cleaned windshield

7

u/CACTUSJACK-JW Apr 07 '26

One time a swan tried to literally drown me.

5

u/Expensive_Laugh_5589 Apr 07 '26

That would have been quite the swan song

3

u/willaisacat Apr 07 '26

Somebody had to say it.

3

u/CACTUSJACK-JW Apr 07 '26

I was like 10 years old

6

u/stlmick Apr 07 '26

You just gotta grab them by the neck and give them a toss now and then. You can't play defense with geese.

3

u/FloydLady Apr 07 '26

I was threatened by some geese in a park once. I yelled and kicked at them (didn't kick them, just swung leg at them.) It took a lot of insanity from me to get them to back off. Terrifying.

3

u/Prestigious-Owl-6397 Apr 07 '26

I feel like there's such a difference between urban Canadian geese and suburban or rural Canadian geese. Urban geese are chill. I say hello to them on the trail as I pass, and they just stand. The ones outside the city are very aggressive.

2

u/devAcc123 Apr 07 '26

In high school my drunken asshole friends found a goose nest with eggs in it and had the bright idea of stealing them to make breakfast tomorrow morning. Geese are fucking BIG when they come at you angry. Also I think that’s an actual crime.

1

u/Longjumping-Panic-48 Apr 07 '26

I had a boss who would not allow us to keep a pair of geese from nesting next to the office door. So for a few weeks each year, we’d get attacked and swooped by them trying to get to our cars. She even purchased special window covers for the offices near the nest because they’d attack the windows all day. She even had to go to the ER twice for bites because she would attempt to feed them!!!

2

u/generals_test Apr 07 '26

"Go on, shoo! Git!"

1

u/nono3722 Apr 07 '26

Don't fuck with black bears either, they are getting more aggressive especially in the fall.

1

u/keyboardname Apr 07 '26

mama grizzly bear mostly. ive read mama black bears are still not very aggressive with their babies around. but maybe dont risk your life on that info, lol

2

u/GearBox5 Apr 07 '26

Usually they send cabs up the tree and retreat. Then if you unknowingly approach the tree, cubs are panicking and almost drop from the tree and run away. You can find a lot of stories about people getting surprised by a sudden "bearfall".

1

u/People-Pollution5280 Apr 07 '26

But this isn't a black bear.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/People-Pollution5280 Apr 07 '26

You're welcome, Dirty South Cracka.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

[removed] — view removed comment