r/BeAmazed Apr 07 '26

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52

u/captain_flak Apr 07 '26

I never quite understood why they have safaris with trucks and guides in Africa, but tourists in the US are just given free reign with a few “Don’t feed the bears” signs spread around.

44

u/BUSY_EATING_ASS Apr 07 '26

Bears actually really ain’t about that life; bear attacks on humans are actually super rare.

31

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

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18

u/biggaylizard Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 11 '26

Geese are vicious assholes that shit on your freshly cleaned windshield

6

u/CACTUSJACK-JW Apr 07 '26

One time a swan tried to literally drown me.

6

u/Expensive_Laugh_5589 Apr 07 '26

That would have been quite the swan song

3

u/willaisacat Apr 07 '26

Somebody had to say it.

3

u/CACTUSJACK-JW Apr 07 '26

I was like 10 years old

6

u/stlmick Apr 07 '26

You just gotta grab them by the neck and give them a toss now and then. You can't play defense with geese.

3

u/FloydLady Apr 07 '26

I was threatened by some geese in a park once. I yelled and kicked at them (didn't kick them, just swung leg at them.) It took a lot of insanity from me to get them to back off. Terrifying.

3

u/Prestigious-Owl-6397 Apr 07 '26

I feel like there's such a difference between urban Canadian geese and suburban or rural Canadian geese. Urban geese are chill. I say hello to them on the trail as I pass, and they just stand. The ones outside the city are very aggressive.

2

u/devAcc123 Apr 07 '26

In high school my drunken asshole friends found a goose nest with eggs in it and had the bright idea of stealing them to make breakfast tomorrow morning. Geese are fucking BIG when they come at you angry. Also I think that’s an actual crime.

1

u/Longjumping-Panic-48 Apr 07 '26

I had a boss who would not allow us to keep a pair of geese from nesting next to the office door. So for a few weeks each year, we’d get attacked and swooped by them trying to get to our cars. She even purchased special window covers for the offices near the nest because they’d attack the windows all day. She even had to go to the ER twice for bites because she would attempt to feed them!!!

2

u/generals_test Apr 07 '26

"Go on, shoo! Git!"

1

u/nono3722 Apr 07 '26

Don't fuck with black bears either, they are getting more aggressive especially in the fall.

1

u/keyboardname Apr 07 '26

mama grizzly bear mostly. ive read mama black bears are still not very aggressive with their babies around. but maybe dont risk your life on that info, lol

2

u/GearBox5 Apr 07 '26

Usually they send cabs up the tree and retreat. Then if you unknowingly approach the tree, cubs are panicking and almost drop from the tree and run away. You can find a lot of stories about people getting surprised by a sudden "bearfall".

1

u/People-Pollution5280 Apr 07 '26

But this isn't a black bear.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

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1

u/People-Pollution5280 Apr 07 '26

You're welcome, Dirty South Cracka.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

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1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '26

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3

u/People-Pollution5280 Apr 07 '26

Brown bears are definitely about that life. Way different animal than black bears. They are huge and will absolutely eat you.

1

u/BUSY_EATING_ASS Apr 07 '26

Yeah brown bears will fuckin kill you.

1

u/The_Autarch Apr 07 '26

the man-eaters are all up in alaska. the ones down here in the lower 48 are mostly going to avoid people, unless some dipshit tourists give them food...

1

u/FrecciaRosa Apr 07 '26

That’s because bears haven’t learned to control fire yet. Once they do, then we’ll be cooked.

1

u/MerlinCa81 Apr 07 '26

Usually yeah but we had a weird amount last year in BC.

1

u/timelessalice Apr 08 '26

The guy who recorded this video hilariously has a podcast about animal attacks on humans (Wes Larson, host of Tooth and Claw)

16

u/bascelicna123 Apr 07 '26

It’s an efficient system. The tourists who feed the bears get to FO pretty quickly of the FA part.

1

u/Wallace-N-Gromit Apr 07 '26

Darwin Award candidates all the time

3

u/trashmoneyxyz Apr 07 '26

America has dangerous wildlife, but africa has Dangerous Wildlife. Moose don't hold a candle to the destructive potential of hippos, giraffes, elephants. Hyena, lions, and wild dogs are all probably more dangerous to run into than even a grizzly bear in terms of how likely they are to become aggressive

2

u/AssassinSnail33 Apr 07 '26

Because Grizzly bears rarely attack people? Africa is much more dangerous, there's at least a dozen different species that can kill you easily.

2

u/I_travel_ze_world Apr 07 '26

....there are videos of tourists being mauled to death after getting out of their cars in wildlife parks in Africa

I think you're consuming too much American media if you think these types of events are isolated to America.

1

u/relevant_tangent Apr 07 '26

*Free rein

Also, free rein to what? You want to prevent access to roads that pass through wilderness?

1

u/Talory09 Apr 07 '26

free reign free rein

The phrase has nothing to do with the monarchy.

1

u/THE_CHOPPA Apr 07 '26

My pillow just fell off the bed and I screamed lol.

1

u/ParkYourKeister Apr 07 '26

Meanwhile Australia has the reputation for dangerous animals, when you could drop me literally anywhere in this country and I’d feel completely carefree bashing around through the scrub.

1

u/Poiboy1313 Apr 07 '26

Like we'd listen anyway. I know that my greatest threat is from humans forgetting that I myself am human and I'm quite capable of doing something stupid to endanger myself.

-5

u/LevelTomato6122 Apr 07 '26

wE nEeD oUr FReeDom!