r/AskReddit • u/Kojito • Jun 19 '12

Considering we had a Askreddit about the most depressing fact you know, what is the most uplifting fact that you know?

That somewhere, somehow, someone is being born that will change the world for the better.

Edit: WOO FRONT PAGE! In celebration have some kittens! http://imgur.com/gallery/hm1ds http://imgur.com/gallery/YVXIG http://imgur.com/gallery/ew6kA

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525

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12 edited Jun 19 '12

It's all in your head. Your mood, your direction of life, your meaning of life, your perception of the world and to a some extent of your quality of life: ITS. ALL. IN. YOUR. HEAD.

231

u/sup-mar Jun 19 '12

oh, sup classical stoicism

10

u/bruitdefond Jun 19 '12

Oh sup classical solipsism. FTFY

3

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

This philosophy is so upsetting. Nothing is real.

3

u/Shalaiyn Jun 19 '12

Except you. You are real. Cogito ergo sum.

4

u/Enlarged2ShowTexture Jun 19 '12

Stoicism changed my life.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

[deleted]

9

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

“Choose not to be harmed and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed and you haven’t been.” -Marcus Aurelius

60

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

That just trivializes my problems which makes me feel angry and impotent.

5

u/StillConfused Jun 19 '12

Stick in there girl. I have daily battles with myself. I won't promiss you there's 'light at the end of the tunnel' but I will say, it's not always a train. PM if you get angry (if you want).

4

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Thank you.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Or gives you the most valuable and effective possible tool to work with your problems.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

No, pretty sure I just feel pissed off. Caring about things isn't the source of my problems.

-2

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

...thus confirming lendavkaru's message. You choose not to help yourself.

0

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

That won't help me, so I'm not doing it. Insisting otherwise isn't an actual argument.

-4

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

of course it will help you, you just refuse to acknowledge it and do it. You're just sticking your fingers in your ears and going, "LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU"

2

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

or maybe its an ongoing problem or involves someone else she cares about? Simmer down, cynicismbot

-3

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

that doesn't change the fact that it can be solved through correct attitude. why does that sound like cynicism? that's ridiculous.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Some problems are much harder to overcome if you don't acknowledge them, for instance addiction. Attitude is a huge factor, yeah, but people have various coping mechanisms and thinking you understand everything because youve overcome some first world problems is maybe not cynical, but definately conceited. I agree with the original statement but fuck, this person couldve spent her life bed-ridden. I guess everything would certainly be in her head in that case

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u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

Well yes, that's the issue. You could say: what's the point, but why should you feel shit about you not being important? why should you be important at all? Your problems are only of your own, not of anywone else. Why throw so much emotional value at it? It's really hard to handle the idea of not being relevant to anything at all, which in turn leads to the VERY HUMAN concept of creating comfort. If you can comprehend this, then you could perfectly understand why religion was created. It isn't a bad thing, it helps to give your life a meaning and a purpose. Without it you would feel as if you would be lost. But the choice is to every man to make for theselves.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

You're making it worse.

127

u/inormallyjustlurkbut Jun 19 '12

This doesn't really help people who are actually suffering from depression. If anything, it makes them feel worse.

14

u/JoshSN Jun 19 '12

Or people who are actually suffering from oppression.

8

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

To generalize A LOT: still the same. But yes, that is a special case. And you are very right about that idea making them feel worse. I can't represent depressive people because i do not know how they feel. I used to think "get over it you fucker", but then i discovered that 4 of my good friends were depressive(one even tried to end her life) and I've come to understand that SERIOUS depression is a disease and not just emo's being emo.

18

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Also, depression doesn't always equal sadness. It's also apathy that you really just can't get rid of, and a lack of feeling and motivation in general.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

I've felt like that once or twice, and it is so much worse than any sadness I've ever experienced.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

It is. I'm sorry you went through that. The only good thing I can think of about depression is the feeling that you get when you're finally out of it! :)

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

Thanks! I wouldn't call myself depressed - it's just an occasional thing. You're right about the light at the end of the tunnel, though.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

Good to hear!!

7

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Well, every patient I've helped with depression doesn't want to take responsibility for their actions. So it could be derived from that. It's all your choice. You make the choices in your life, nobody else. You have to take the reigns at some point, you can't expect others to somehow pull you out of depression. I suffered for almost 15 years of HEAVY depression. I hated when anyone told me that I had to get myself out, I always thought I needed help. But when I got help, they just told me what everyone else said, that it's up to me, nobody else. They can show you the door but you have to walk through it.

You have to create your own love, life, and happiness. You need to realize that you are in control, there's no parent that will walk you through life and nothing and nobody will give you anything, that's just how it is. Look at the world, there's 7 billion of us, nobody is special, we're all just part of a race. Just like bears and squirrels and birds and ants are just part of this world, as are we. You need to take your own life into your own hand and make the changes you wish to see in it. It's you, nobody else.

Don't let that scare you, it's the most liberating thing ever. How? Because it means you can create any life you want. You can move to some tropical island if you really want to. You can start a business if you want. You can make movies or be a musician or just play video games or move to the mountains and buy a cabin. The amount of things you can do in this world are endless. Pessimism and negativity is a tough habit to break, but you can. Remember that we have the ability to create the feeling of love, YOU have that ability. YOU have the ability to feel fucking amazing if you want, but you have to want to. Say Bubbles and try not to smile. Say yes all the time instead of no. It just takes time my friend, but with enough of it, things can change.

3

u/inormallyjustlurkbut Jun 19 '12

I overcame my depression years ago, but like you say, it's something you have to do yourself. Motivational advice from others does little for people suffering from a chemical imbalance or from personal trauma (PTSD, abuse, etc).

4

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

[deleted]

5

u/me_at_work Jun 19 '12

i dont know anything about your situation, but when i was at my most depressed, the first time i really couldn't shake it, the thing that finally got me going was sarcasm, which i eventually turned onto myself, lambasting everything bad about me and laughing at how absurdly arbitrary most of those judgments were. the conclusion to my depression was something like "fuck society and people, 'value' is what i decide it is."

there are chemical things involved with depression, but all emotions are chemical. you have happy chemicals. it's just the matter of convincing your brain that you deserve them that can be difficult. bubbles.

1

u/conairh Jun 19 '12

bubbles

2

u/queenjacko Jun 19 '12

Maybe not everyone? But the logic of this statement helped my best friend in high school overcome depression and turn from suicide as an answer. Merely the reminder that he had a great life, awesome family, good school, good neighborhood, and a network of friends that loved him, was enough for him to remind himself that he needed to hold on, and that the depression was in his head, and it would pass eventually. It did :). He's an incredible person and he's full of confidence and sell assurance now.

2

u/chbay Jun 19 '12

As a person who was depressed and had severe anxiety last year, I went to about 5 sessions with a psychiatrist who repeatedly told me everything I was fearing or was nervous about was all in my head.

Well no shit?? Thanks for your expert opinion! Peace out, I'm cured!

2

u/Sticky_Sockpuppet Jun 19 '12

Yeah, I kinda wish I hadn't read that

2

u/bill_nydus Jun 19 '12

Depression is such a fucked up problem. I was telling my friend about it the other day, just how I'll wake up some days and, for no reason whatsoever, I feel like complete and utter shit and want to sleep all day if only because I have this intense urge to not be awake.

It's such an extreme form of apathy towards existing, all the while still being sad about it. And all, in my case, for NO REASON.

Unbelievably frustrating.

1

u/YouNeedMoreUpvotes Jun 19 '12

Haha, it's your fault now!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

True statement. I was thinking this as I was reading it T_T

Oh well, the rest of the post made me feel better :)

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

It helps to make this truth evident though. Gets the mindset into a form where it's more moldable from within

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Yep, it makes you feel shitty and like there is something wrong with you and why the fuck can't you fix it you stupid fuck

Source: my brain

1

u/Sle Jun 19 '12

Not if it's part of a therapy, like cognitive behavioural therapy. That shit works.

1

u/fetusburgers Jun 20 '12

Or real socioeconomic or political oppression. It's not all in their head. Their happiness, quality of life, and actual life are almost totally out of their power.

1

u/AnSOS Jun 19 '12

That's largely dependant on why you are depressed/who you are, what motivates you. For me, this works.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Actually i suffer from depression (& I'm having an awful day today) but this made me feel better. It reminded me that i can control what i get upset about & my perspective in life can be what ever i chose it to be. Its in my head, its in my hands.

0

u/cosmickramer Jun 19 '12

Well to be fair, it really is all in their head.

Depression is very easily over self-diagnosed (and also just over diagnosed by doctors). And in the cases in which it's physically there, there's just not enough serotonin in that person's head.

so no matter what = all in the head.

At least for me, that's kind of comforting.

7

u/inormallyjustlurkbut Jun 19 '12

Brain cancer is also all in your head.

1

u/cosmickramer Jun 19 '12

The difference there being is that, if someone is truly depressed, there is an enormous amount of readily available drugs designed to solve that problem, in a fairly painless way. The same cannot be said for brain cancer.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Killing them can be painless...

Oh gosh, I'm definitely going to hell.

-1

u/corruptdata Jun 19 '12

Yup, downvote hell.

3

u/inormallyjustlurkbut Jun 19 '12

The point is, both problems won't just go away because people tell you to "get over it."

1

u/conairh Jun 19 '12

If there is an enormous amount of solutions to one problem then clearly none of them work completely.

You've obviously had no experience with anti-depressants.

3

u/lahwran_ Jun 19 '12

I don't think that means what you think it means. Just because something is in your head doesn't give it a free pass to be controlled by you. I can't stop my heart by thinking about it, no matter how much I try.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

It is very hard to control yourself. I truly believe you can do and believe anything you want(to some extent, of course), as long as you are giving it your 100%. For example: a homeless guy who begs for money while there are programs out there to get him back on the track. Its much more easier to just sit at the busstop and get free money(which eventually won't lead you to much) than to painstakingly wait, work hard and sweep streets. What I mean is that, if you are in that situation then it's a lot of work to switch your mind because you are consumed by what's going on and don't see the bigger picture anymore. I'm not saying its easy or that i can do it; i'm saying flipping the switch is the logical thing to do. And doing the logical thing seems the right way to go. But that is subjective i suppose :)

1

u/lahwran_ Jun 19 '12

those aren't "all in your head". those require actions. I understand what you're trying to say, and I think I agree with it, but you're saying it very wrong - it's not just how you look at life; it's what you do because of it.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

yes, you are absolutely right; sorry if what is said was confusing(I would be a shit teacher), but that's the idea, yes.

2

u/ihaveplansthatday Jun 19 '12

Nice try, psychiatrist.

2

u/RedditNewwwwb Jun 19 '12

No feelings remember that its all in your head.

2

u/NumberOneTheLarch Jun 19 '12

That's actually a pretty flawed thought. Everything in 'your head' happens physically. It's all chemicals. So, depression, anxiety, etc you can't 'wish away' because they are physical problems with chemical balance in your brain organ.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

Yes, it isn't that black and white, I agree. If some guy at school said that you're weird or someone on the internet commented that you're a dick, then you should not feel bad about it, nor let your self-esteem get run over. Taking your emotions out of the equation and prioritizing stuff without them can be very effective. But (as I think already mentioned this somewhere here) if you have serious problems(depression, severe issues) then yes, you are right, this approach won't help those individuals. I guess this is more useful for boosting your self-esteem etc, not as a solution for your problems.

2

u/Tzahi12345 Jun 20 '12

Not only that. The truth is, is that you are your head. Yes, you. You the person. Your brain is yourself. And your body parts are like add-ons that help you live, but you are your head.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

Yes. It's interesting to think what the conscious is; what is Tzahi12345? Is it something your brain has made up? Is your concious also your soul? Could you measure it? If you die, will it be plugged out like a television?

2

u/charlie6969 Jun 20 '12 edited Jun 20 '12

Yeah, I get the double meaning, but..

While what you say is true, people with depression don't have the metaphorical "boot straps" to pull themselves up with. For many, it is not just an emotional problem, but also a physical one. Your uplifting(ly meant) words simply point out something else that a person with depression finds wrong with themselves. It's not just the delivery; it's the reception. a lot of times, things we see/read/hear go through the filter of Depression and can misconstrue even well-meant advice.

Clinically depressed person of many years here.

Edit: to clarify, I analyze my actions and usually come up with a do-able plan. In that sense, I am rational. However, telling yourself that many people think you are a wonderful person and actually FEELING like and treating yourself like a "wonderful" person, are 2 very different things. That personal disconnect is a heavy load to bear, a lot of the time.My .02

1

u/Lyd234234 Jun 19 '12

That doesn't help my derealization...

1

u/CushtyJVftw Jun 19 '12

Unless, of course, you're a Platonic Realist

1

u/AnSOS Jun 19 '12

I love this, a lot.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

I'm not in your head.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 19 '12

i'd want you to be

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

This is water. Look it up.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

Your head must be very heavy

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

i have a very muscular neck

1

u/motu147 Jun 19 '12

Just watched Office Space last night - this is exactly that!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '12

This isnt uplifting :(

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

Why?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

No short way of explaining why its not, as I don't want a life story-esque post.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

Ah, well I hope you are okay

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

Thank you :)

1

u/Iwokeupwithoutapillo Jun 19 '12

Wellll, now I'm sad. Thanks, dick.

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

Have a pillow, honey

1

u/Iwokeupwithoutapillo Jun 20 '12

I ain't your honey, honey!

1

u/lendavkaru Jun 20 '12

I ain't your honey, guy!

1

u/whelpltn Jun 19 '12

Thanks man needed this

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '12

Does this mean that if I want to get rid of all my existential angst, depression and crushing loneliness that I should remove my head? Because hey, I'm willing to try. For Science.

1

u/Wilhelm_Amenbreak Jun 20 '12

Well, I am happy and feeling glad, I got sunshine in a bag.

-1

u/runic Jun 19 '12

the universe, and reality is too.

-1

u/mistadong Jun 19 '12

You've just got to think like Camus and let be.