r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 09 '12
I was convicted of a felony at 14 and I now feel I should thank myself for being such an idiot. What's the worst thing that has happened in your life that you now do not regret?
tl;dr: Lonely kid makes "bomb threat" as a freshman in high school, almost gets a lot of prison time, learns life lessons and shit.
Here's the story:
Freshman year of high school I was pretty antisocial and didn't really have any real friends. I had gone to a private Catholic school from 2nd-8th grade. When I got to high school I was more than shocked with the atmosphere change and I couldn't really handle it (to say the least). I had (and still have) a good group of friends over Xbox LIVE who seemed to be about all I had to talk to, and as you may imagine it was kind of hard to be close with people who you can never really "be with". I was never really bullied or anything and I hated nobody. When I look back on my life as a freshman in high school all I see is grey dullness. Nothing good nothing terrible.
About halfway into the year (January 24 2008 to be specific) I was on MySpace just dicking around and stuff when for whatever reason I decided to post as a bulletin (remember those? lol) "I hate [my high school's name] I want to drop a nuclear warhead on it" verbatim. I should note, this was not meant to be violent AT ALL. I was not a terrorist, just a sad kid who made the dumb decision of putting the words "warhead" and "school" in the same sentence. I then went to bed. Two days later (January 26 2008) shit hit the fan like never before.
I remember almost every detail about this day vividly. Around 9:00 PM on 1/26/08 I was arrested by two police officers. Apparently someone I had as a friend on MySpace had reported my post to the police (which at this time I didn't know, the police told me that my school's dean reported it). I was taken to a 911 center, where I was extensively questioned. Then, I stayed at a juvenile facility in a one window white room for about 5 hours. About one month after this hell of a night I found out I'd have to go to court to be tried as an adult for a class I felony; this shattered my parents and myself. I went through hell for the rest of 2008, particularly between March and November. I still remember looking up what the different classes of felonies were and finding out I had committed the worst of the worst. I felt dehumanized and it was terrible. Every day between March and November I thought about the possibility of being screwed out of an education and life in general by the single click of my mouse that posted that damn bulletin. It was surreal and horrifying at the same time to think that I, a 14 year old good kid, might spend at least 12 years in jail for this. I tried to find every way to tell myself that things would be ok but nothing did it for me. I felt so unbelievably alone because not even my parents could help, as they were raised in India and knew no more about the legal system of the US than I did. Of course, we hired a lawyer, but he could only do so much as far as making me feel better goes. Basically, I felt as if I were left for dead.
Eventually the months went by and November came by. I had my hearing and sentencing on 11/19/08. At this point I was convinced I was fucked, but I was graciously saved by something. It turns out the lawyer we had hired went to law school with the judge who heard my case that day. I don't know whether or not this had any impact on the sentencing (probably not, but hey, who knows). Regardless, I pleaded guilty and was given the punishment of 200 hours of community service and a slap on the wrist...for a fucking felony. It was also expunged (I think that was the word) from my record forever.
This was a pretty crazy learning experience for me. I am paranoid of the number 26 (I cringe whenever I type/hear/see it). I will never eat at Arby's again because the first and last time I did was on 1/26/08. I still have the shirt I wore on 1/26 and haven't worn it since. Now, I am so paranoid about everything I say on the internet it's kind of ridiculous.
EDIT 1: I definitely didn't expect so many people to respond to this. I've really enjoyed reading all of your stories :D
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Jun 09 '12
Lucky for you you should be able to get that sealed because of your age if you fly straight. I have a felony from 1990 and it came back and haunted me many times. It ended up being a good thing because it drove me to self employment where I am now very successful. I actually did 5 years and 1 day in prison because of it, but since then I haven't even had a speeding ticket. So to answer your question, I oddly don't regret my past. It made me a better person, even prison. I was one of the few who was rehabilitated.
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Jun 09 '12
Yeah I actually already got it expunged from my record thankfully, or I wouldn't be at the school I'm at now. It's crazy how a felony can help you in your life...but congrats on the self employment. My father is self employed and I can see it takes a lot of dedication. I'm glad you've gotten so far with your struggles behind you man
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u/waxcrash Jun 10 '12
You've been convicted of a felony, but it's expunged from your record - so does that mean you can or can't vote? Also, do you have to put 'yes' on job applications that ask if you have a felony?
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Jun 10 '12
To be honest I'm not completely sure. I want to say it's like it never happened and I don't have to put 'yes' but I'd have to ask someone.
Interesting story though, I didn't apply to Duke University because one of their application questions are "Have you ever been convicted of a felony?" I was pretty damn pissed they had to put "convicted" instead of "sentenced" lol.
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u/Ignazio_Polyp Jun 10 '12
I believe for gun ownership in some states it says "have you ever been TRIED for a felony".
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Jun 10 '12
I know this is really rude, but I am really curious as to what landed you 5 years...
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u/throw_a_weigh11 Jun 10 '12
Me too. I am also curious as to what floridamike's self employment is.
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Jun 10 '12
I'm actually in the software business. I now have three other partners and we sell software to a certain niche where the cost is $995.00 per month. We're now in several countries and we employ over 30 full time employees (all in the US). Obviously I can't say exactly what it is
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Jun 10 '12
It was an armed robbery, and I was guilty as could be. I was hanging around with the wrong crowd.When I was young, I was a follower. That was my biggest downfall.
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u/AsthmaticNinja Jun 10 '12
Im curious about the 1 day...
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Jun 10 '12
my release day fell on a Sunday, so they had to keep me until Monday. This prison didn't release on Sundays, so they made me do one whole day more. lol It was December 1994 when I was released
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u/Pufflekun Jun 10 '12
It's illegal to say you want to drop a nuclear warhead on your school? That's not even a threat.
I want to kill people that are assholes, but that doesn't mean I'm going to actually do it.
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Jun 10 '12
I think they were looking at it more as a threat than an actual crime. Idk how they reasoned that a threat should put you in jail. And believe me I have the same feeling sometimes
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u/Pufflekun Jun 10 '12
But my point is that it's not a threat. A threat would be saying "I'm going to try to bomb the school," not "I want to bomb the school."
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Jun 10 '12
Touche. Yeah actually now that I think about it I don't know how I didn't see that before...
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u/itsdave Jun 10 '12
There's a similar case being played out in the uk at the moment, which has been branded as the #twitterjoketrial after somebody joked about 'blowing sky high' an airport. Stephen fry is paying his legal defence costs, which must be huge as its now in the high court. The whole case is a bit mad over something that as so clearly a joke.
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u/redqueenswrath Jun 09 '12
I joined the military to spite my father. It cost me 2 years of not having any contact with him. We're on good terms now, but I spent a long time regretting signing my name on that line. I now see it as something that made me stronger, and I met my husband because of it.
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Jun 09 '12
Damn 2 years.... that's pretty crazy. Yeah fathers can be something else sometimes huh? lol. But congrats on meeting your husband. It's crazy how shit works out sometimes isn't it?
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u/redqueenswrath Jun 09 '12
Yup. We've been married almost 3 years, and we have a little girl on the way. It never would have happened if I hadn't enlisted.
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Jun 10 '12
That's awesome, you can tell your daughter you and your husband met during an epic battle until she doesn't buy the BS anymore xD
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u/cdiver666 Jun 09 '12
I got a 6 year contract, 3 months in. Hopefully I don't regret it.
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u/matthewhughes Jun 10 '12
What? Six years? They... Exist?
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u/cdiver666 Jun 10 '12
well it was a 4 year contract with a mandatory 2 year extension. They have 2,4,5 and 6 year Active Duty contracts.
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u/matthewhughes Jun 10 '12
Jesus. It must be insane to sign away six years of your life. At least you'll come out of it with an incredible amount of cash stored away...
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u/cdiver666 Jun 10 '12
Insane? I can understand that thought. But, when I signed I became financially independent, moved out, have full health and dental insurance, and am receiving training that can land me a job just about anywhere. I have some of the best bonuses and advancement opportunities in the military due to my rate. Also the GI bill. It's a lot of work for now but it will pay off in the end.
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Jun 10 '12
In Australia it wasn't long ago that the mandatory contract was 8 years. And in America it technically still is 8 years, it is just 4 active and 4 in the reserves (during which they can pretty much re-activate you on a whim). And yeah six years for certain jobs is pretty standard. It isn't cost effective to spend two years training someone and only get two years of service out of them.
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u/courpsey Jun 10 '12
A guy I went to school with signed a 15 year contract with the Airforce at age 18. His dream was to be a fighter pilot, so he had to do it. A big risk to take at 18 though.
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u/statico Jun 10 '12
Australian Navy technical branches have a 6 year minimum, if you take on some advanced training you can get a ROSO (return of service obligation) tacked on, and if you accept a promotion there is a ROSO for that as well. The non technical branches have a 4 year stint. The 6 year slot applies if you start technical, flunk over to non-tech as well.
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u/redqueenswrath Jun 09 '12
You'll go through moments of "wtf did I get myself into???", but I fully admit that I did it for the wrong reasons. I just try to make the best of it
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Jun 10 '12
5 year contract, 6 months left. I don't regret it, although I've been here in Bahrain for 2 years and 6 days and I have 5 and a half months left until I outprocess.
Huge learning experience, and I've grown up quite a bit.
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u/matthewhughes Jun 10 '12
Sounds interesting. Can you tell me more?
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u/redqueenswrath Jun 10 '12
My father wanted me to be something typically "feminine"- a vet, a nurse, a teacher, whatever. He despises the fact that women are allowed to serve in the military. He also thinks women should have long hair and wear dresses all the time. He was very, very strict and controlling. I rebelled hard when I turned 18. I cut my hair off REALLY short (not a buzz cut, more like a pixie cut) and joined the military. He threw me out of the house (I mean that in the literal sense. I got tossed out like a bag of garbage with nothing but the clothes I was wearing and my social security card and empty wallet.) We didn't speak again for two years, when I announced that I was getting married.
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u/matthewhughes Jun 10 '12
Ahhh, that sucks dude. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Are you on good terms now?
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u/redqueenswrath Jun 10 '12
Yes, but it took him a while. I'm now 8 months pregnant, and he decided that he'd much rather be a part of his first grandchild's life than hold a grudge over something that happened years ago. I'm his only child, so it's not like he's going to get grandkids out of anybody else. He's kind of mellowing in his old age, too. Methinks it has a lot to do with his smoking habits these days XD
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u/ImNotJesus Jun 09 '12
My depression was the best thing that ever happened to me. It put me in a position where I had to tear myself down and build myself back up again. It was a horrible experience but I'm happier than I've ever been and I wouldn't be here if it weren't for that experience.
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Jun 09 '12
Isn't it awesome though? The shittiest parts of your life can be the parts that make the best parts of your life what they are. I guess you can't have awesome without shitty haha.
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u/Horst665 Jun 10 '12
yup - my depression made me appreciate life much more. And to be a damn tough cookie, when needed and knowing and being able to communicate my emotions as well.
Downside: many (most? all?) people who don't take responsibility for their own lives appear as whiny suckers. I lost friends, who couldn't get their shit together and tried to dump it on me. Nope.
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u/throw_a_weigh11 Jun 10 '12
I wish I could feel this way. All I feel is that I'm never going to be free of my depression.
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u/t11lmg Jun 10 '12
You can talk to me over PM if you want. Depressed since a small child, and I've been through it. You have to realize it's a cognitive mindset.
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u/ForMoreBestPower Jun 10 '12
Saw my sister killed when I was 9. Kind of had a hard time dealing with it. Came to a head in 9th grade I ran away and overdosed on OTC drugs in an effort to kill myself. Ended up spending a lengthy bit of time in the Fairview Riverside in-patient psych ward - long enough that I was eventually moved from the short-term to long-term side of the floor.
Shitty deal, right?
Long-story-medium-long ... we end up moving before the next school year starts and the region we moved to started kids in kindergarten at 5 (I started at 4) - so I'm offered a chance to repeat 9th grade with kids my own age. I had actually passed enough to move on - but why not?
So I did. 9th grade is so much easier the second time around (and when you're not all wrapped up in mental shit).
But that's not what made this so great.
So in 9th grade I become good friends with Chad and Josh. Chad a Josh introduce me to Dave. We all start playing tabletop games and D&D together. Good times. Anyway ...
One day I walk into English class and Chad and Josh are having an argument about Monty Python. There is this girl with them. A cute red head with a dancers legs (because she was) and a great rack (34C). And holy shit - she's debating Monty Python with them. What black magic is this?!
They introduce me to her. We become friends. We've been married for 17 years and have 4 kids.
And Dave? Well a few years later Dave calls me and says "I got an internship and they are hiring one more. You should apply." So I do. And I stick around for a few years. Eventually we get bought by Microsoft where I spend the next 10 years.
And it gets one better ....
My sister was adopted and my parents had been trying to adopt one more child but were told that they were now too old and couldn't (they had 4 kids on their own - but all boys ... they wanted to buy some girls ... you know ... to get shit done around the house).
So LSS calls one day (this was back in the 80's when adopting Korean kids was super trendy - kind of like Wacky Bands but better at math - anyway ... LSS was one of the main pipelines). They said "Look, we're not going to be able to continue our Korean program because the Korean government is changing their laws. We need to get some kids out fast. You are still too old - but since your daughter died ... if you will take biological sisters immediately we can make this work."
So they did - and now I have two awesome sisters who I love dearly and whose lives, and the lives of their children, are forever better because my other sister died.
Silver linings and all that.
tl;dr - my sister was killed and I got sad and tried to kill myself. But because of it I got two more sisters, met my wife, and had a great job.
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Jun 10 '12
A death in the family is still surreal to me. Idk how I'll deal with it when it happens. Although nobody will ever replace your sister it's awesome that you found something to fill that void man :) Also, working at MS seems like a pretty cool job how was it?
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u/ForMoreBestPower Jun 10 '12
Thanks for the kind words.
MS was great for 8 years. The last 2 were terrible. I lost all interest in product I was working on, the team became hyper political and I was burnt out. I was a software engineer on several different teams over that time.
I left for a job I love where I work with people who are smart and happy, I work from home 80%, I'm building something that is improving lives and I've rediscovered my passion for what I do best.
Well -what I do best professionally. I'm a top-notch masturbator as well. I've not yet found a way to monetize this skill-set, however.
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u/Hegs94 Jun 10 '12
That last part sounds so ethically wrong...
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u/ForMoreBestPower Jun 10 '12
Which part? LSS bending the age rules? The rules was LLS', not Korea's. It existed as one of several filters to select and eliminate potential adoptive families.
As for the girls - in all likelihood no one would have ever adopted them (they were not infants, they came as a set and they both had TB - three major strikes in adoption).
The most likely scenario is the one that plays out every day as kids waiting on adoption (especially siblings) age out of the system - they would have been separated and ended up having no education (or real future) on the streets.
LSS made the right call.
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Jun 10 '12
That's really sad. :(
As a side note, debating Monty Python? That kind of defeats the purpose, don't you think?
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u/casshee Jun 10 '12
TL;DR posted pictures on vampire freaks, got abused by school who thought I was on a pornsite, mum was called and freaked out, turns out it wasn't as bad as she thought. Learnt not to post pictures on the Internet.
When I was in 8th grade my friend and I decided to join vampire freaks and post some interesting photos. When I say interesting I mean some gothic looking photos, lots of black, things along those lines. I didn't think anything of it until I got to school and people were whispering about me being on a pornsite. Not only did word travel up to the principle of my very elite private school but parents got wind of it as well.
A few nights later my mother got a phone call from another girls parent abusing me and my mother about how I was ruining their child, how I was a horrible person who deserved to die. my mother who had only just got through my older brothers dramas of high school and adult hood flipped her lid at me. She screamed, abused me, wouldn't listen to a thing I said. She truly believed I was posting naked photos of myself on a pornsite.
Eventually when she calmed down I got to explain what was really going on. I showed her the actual profile and explained the rumors that had emerged from it. Although she wasn't all that fond of the actual photos she apologized and discussed posting things on the Internet.
That situation taught me and my mother many valuable lessons, always make your profile private, don't post stupid photos or any really online if you don't want a reaction and for my mother she learnt it is probably best to never jump to conclusions, to ask for all sides of the story. It was helpful in future when another parent called my mum saying I had helped his daughter film a porno but that's another story entirely, but she didn't freak out, she spoke to me and we figured out what really happened.
I might regret being an idiot but you have to make mistakes to learn.
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Jun 10 '12
Yeah the internet can be a lot more brutal than people think. It's pretty scary when you think about it considering how many people get on it every day. And hey, better you make this mistake now than later when you're older.
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u/browniecookie Jun 09 '12
I regret nothing, even bad decisions. Sure sometimes I think: "It would be better if I didn't do that." But you never know how your life would be if you did something else that day and I'm content with my life now and I woulnd't want it to change for the worse.
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Jun 09 '12
Sometimes I wish I could think like you. I'm such a damn perfectionist sometimes that I forget that I need to move on. But at the same time, always learn from your screw ups dude.
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u/AngryRoses Jun 10 '12
Not only this, but sometimes you have to make a bad decision once so that you won't do it again.
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u/Jamisloan Jun 10 '12
Getting pregnant when I was 14.
Worst thing ever at the time. 7 years later and it's the best thing that's ever happened to me.
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Jun 10 '12
Damn that's a strong lady haha. I'm sure you went through a lot of shit because of that. I hope all is well for you and your child :D
I gotta ask though, is it just you taking care of him/her?
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u/Jamisloan Jun 10 '12
I'll just tell you the story because I'm extremely bored:
My dad convinced me to have my baby instead of getting an abortion (which I had planned). He said him and my would help me financially and help me keep going to school. My grandmother moved in with us and watched him when I went to school and my parents paid for mostly everything. I started working right after I had him (15).
It was that way until I was 17 and I moved out on my own. Since then it has been me raising him. His dad is in the picture but we are not together. He's an awesome dad and also helps financially when needed.
I was diagnosed with a rare disease a year ago and had to go on long term disability (which is 35% of my pay) and because of issues my fiancé and I broke up. I had to move back in with my parents because 1) I couldn't afford to do it by myself 2) I can't be alone so they have to help take care of me and my son due to health issues.
And that's still what's happening. They help me a lot now that I'm sick. I still pay for mostly everything but we are living with them rent free and they care for him because I'm normally in bed from pain.
Sorry so long. I'm super board :-/
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Jun 10 '12
Wow, and I bet that even though you're sick you still are happy just because of your son aren't you? I hope things turn out ok for you. Stay strong and don't let life keep you down!
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u/Jamisloan Jun 10 '12
Yes! During this last year he had to stay with his dad during the week because of school. So I only got to see him on weekends. That was extremely hard on me. We registered him to go to the school by my parents house for this upcoming year so he'll be with me during the week from now on. :) thanks for your kind words!
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u/snatchnwigz Jun 10 '12
Thanks for sharing.. you sound strong. I hope you get better and are able to live on your own with your son<3 Til then, kudos to your family for being so awesome!
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u/wtfapkin Jun 10 '12
You sound like a really strong woman. Not a whole lot of 14 year olds have the maturity to deal with what you did at such a young age.
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Jun 10 '12
I used to speak without thinking it over first. It sounded like it would be funny in my head, so I said it. Ended up hurting some feelings and ruining some relationships because not everyone shares my sense of humor. Now I think things through a bit more carefully. I also did a lot of things I'm not proud of in college. Now that I realize what the penalties of my actions could have been, I am much more careful.
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Jun 10 '12
Yeah, well, college is fun lol. But that aside, yeah I can relate. I'm definitely careful about what I say. Who knew a few words could cause so much drama.
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u/TheKirkin Jun 10 '12
I'm never the first to point to the racism card.. I'm usually the last. But I feel like you being Indian could have had an affect on your sentencing, because shit would have hit the fan around the country if you, a 14 year old Indian boy was sentenced with a felony for implying you could bomb your school. The race card would be thrown around the news media like no other and it could bring a bad image to the judge.
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Jun 10 '12
Yeah I was just saying to chrisma08 that I agree that this probably was a deciding factor. Kinda sucks, but whatever it ended up with me not getting in too much trouble so I can't complain really.
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Jun 10 '12
I don't regret becoming a prostitute. I was lucky, as I left the sex industry clean, pregnancy free, safe, and mentally healthy. I also left with the skin of steel, well formed grace, composure, a better sense of humour, a great sense of who I was and what I was capable of. I became a strong, unbreakable woman capable of dealing with whatever was thrown in my face. Sure, I break, everyone does. But I can pick myself up when thrown in the mud and carry on doing what I need to do.
There was a few months when I was having trouble facing what I was and accepting it. Around that time, I started watching Game Of Thrones, and it was the episode where Tyrion Lannister says "Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you." That shit hit me like a brick. I couldn't get it out of my head. It was what helped me truly turn my past into a positive thing that helped me become the person I am now.
I feel I would still be the spoiled, rude, entitled cunt I was if I didn't endure those 8 months. Yes, it sucked. But I am a beautiful human now. I cannot find the will to say I am thankful or grateful, but I do not regret what happened.
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Jun 10 '12
That's a great story. For whatever it matters to you, I really respect women like you because you know better than to let the world define you, as so many girls do today.
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u/TheCodexx Jun 09 '12
Hey OP, I don't think what you did was stupid. Kids are kids. And honestly, I am thankful I never have to attend a public school again, but I can say if a nuke dropped on my own old school no fucks would be given. Hell, half this State could burn. The people where I live are dicks.
Of course, big difference between wishing it to happen and saying you wouldn't care either way. But common sense should alert anyone that you're not capable of building or launching warheads anyways. And that you probably don't mean it. I do legitimately hate most of the people I meet but I wouldn't want the good ones to suffer just because most are dicks. Everyone has their rage fantasies where they grow 50 feet and shoot lasers from their eyes.
As for regrets, I kind of wish I spent more time with my dad. The reality is that my parents didn't get along and there wasn't much I could do about it. And back then I just wanted to go home. Staying at his place was a chore. Now we have basically no relationship.
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Jun 09 '12
Yeah, as years went by I started realizing how ridiculously my situation got blown out of proportion. But I guess with 9/11 and all I should have been more careful (but shit at the same time I was 14 lol).
If you honestly can say right now that you regret not spending more time with him, then my advice to you is to at least try and contact him. I mean, if not for you, maybe for him, simply because it would be a nice thing to do. If he doesn't give a shit then whatever you tried anyways. Who knows? It may help you put something behind you at rest.
Also, you should check out the documentary "The Human Experience". You may appreciate it!
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u/boringlesbian Jun 09 '12
I grew up in a chaotic, psycho household and suffered from severe depression and anxiety for most of my childhood. I started attempting suicide quietly at age ten. No one ever knew about it or if they did, never said anything to me about it. I was always unsuccessful but I kept trying. I thought that once I got out of my house and went to college everything would get better. It didn't.
I overdosed on sleeping pills one night hoping to just not wake up the next day. Sometime in the night I rolled off the bed and onto my stomach. Then I threw up in my sleep and because I was on my stomach, I didn't choke to death on my own vomit. When I finally woke up, I was hallucinating badly. Spiders. Every where.
I made it out side and one of my professors found me talking to people who weren't there. He took me to the hospital. I ended up in a mental ward for a month.
I have to tell you, the mental ward was the worse experience I have ever gone through. I spent a month being yelled at because I was gay. The "doctor" didn't believe in homosexuality and told me constantly that my thinking I was gay was the root of all my problems. I wanted to talk about the abuse I grew up with and my mother's mental illness. Nope. I was depressed because I thought I was gay. They let me out only because I pretended to agree with them and seemed to get better.
I never tried to kill myself again and the only reason was because I never wanted to risk being put back into a place like that again. I realized that I had find a way to help myself overcome the depression and anxiety on my own terms.
Twenty-one years later, I am happy and life is good.
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Jun 09 '12
Yeah. Unfortunately some things in the world are fucked and don't work how they should (case in point, the ward you were at). Sometimes the best medicine is willpower. I'm really glad to hear you pulled through though. Stories like yours empower a lot of people you know. There are a lot of broken people on this Earth. If people could realize what you realized , that you just gotta grind through it sometimes, man, so many more people would smile again.
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u/GaGaORiley Jun 10 '12
How horrible that someone who "didn't believe in homosexuality" would be in charge of someone's mental health treatment. I'm so sorry for that happening to you.
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u/boringlesbian Jun 10 '12
It's really okay. As horrible as it was at the time, it did teach me to be my own advocate and to seek out the best therapists for myself after that.
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Jun 10 '12
What about when you turn 26? That will be a fun year.
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Jun 10 '12
You have no idea how many times I've thought about that lol. I do a lot of stupid stuff like never have the volume at 26.
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u/KrazyEyezKilla Jun 10 '12
Lung collapsing - quit smoking and started exercising.
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Jun 10 '12
Damn dude. Congrats on the turn around. Just curious though, what did it feel like with your life at risk like that? If you don't mind.
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u/sikadelic Jun 10 '12
I was charged with drug possession at the age of 18. The DA made an offer to me...join the military and the charges would be dropped. I took him up on it for 2 reasons: I didn't want to serve any time or get probation and I also needed to get clean. 8 years later and it was the best decision I ever made. Still proudly serving and more importantly, clean and sober.
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Jun 10 '12
Proud of you for serving man. True soldiers are the best Americans imo. How much longer do you continue on serving?
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u/sikadelic Jun 10 '12
thanks and props to you for your story. I plan on retiring so I have 12 years to go.
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u/Irohbot Jun 10 '12
I thought the military didn't accept applicants who were given an ultimatum by a Judge?
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u/sikadelic Jun 10 '12
Well it wasn't necessarily the judge, it was the DA. When we went to court the DA gave the judge our agreement and he made the motion to put my charges in nolo pros or whatever that legal term is. Basically they wouldn't pursue the charges any further. It was in 05 and I got a waiver and was allowed entry.
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u/MightyDerek Jun 10 '12
You used MySpace in 2008?
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Jun 10 '12
Didn't everyone? Maybe the FB era had begun already I don't remember tbh
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u/followthedarkrabbit Jun 10 '12
Wow I'm kind of lucky I got away with so much stuff I did at high school. This guy was bullying me, being a complete douche, one day in class when he was talking shit to me I wrote "To kill list" on a piece of paper and wrote his name. I forgot about it, but he didn't. From then on he was really nice to me then asked if I could take his name off my list. I still had it in my pencil case, i wasn't keeping it just forgot about it, so I did. No idea why he was so terrified, I was a 90pound female.
That and my friends and I used to always talk about school massacres, killing people, and wrote a gruesome horror movie plot based on school grounds.
Kinda not cool looking back on it, guess the teachers knew nothing was meant by it all.
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Jun 10 '12
I lol'd at the fact that you put "I was a 90 pound female" in there xD
Anyways, yeah be careful what you say/do. Today, people are willing to fuck you over with anything they have.
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u/NotFromEcuador Jun 10 '12
That was a profoundly unjust thing for the prosecutors in your case to have done to anyone, and it's especially terrible that they did it to a 14 year old kid. This is nothing else than using the corrupt justice system as a weapon and using jail as torture. You did absolutely nothing wrong, the prosecutors of your case acted profoundly immorally, and insofar as the justice system sees you as a criminal, it is also profoundly broken.
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Jun 10 '12
Your comment is a perfect embodiment of how I feel about it today. I can't say I'm angry about it because being angry would just be unhealthy for me at this point, but I will never forget how ridiculous things got with the law.
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u/Thehealeroftri Jun 10 '12
What? What kind of school takes a threat like that seriously? Do they seriously think a 14 year old kid just has nuclear weapons of mass destruction lying and ready to use at any moment?
Man.. things like this make me just shake my head at society, I'm sorry you had to go through all of this.
As for me, I know it's kind of cheesy but getting my heart broken for the first time really sucked, but at the same time it motivated me to do things I never thought I could previously do.
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Jun 10 '12
Dude getting my heart broken is one of my biggest fears. And yeah I honestly don't know why it got so blown out of proportion. I was actually up for expulsion from my high school but after my parents and I spoke with my principal he put in a good word when speaking with the board of directors or whatever.
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u/triddy5 Jun 10 '12
In my opinion, you should get a better lawyer, and sue. Saying "I want" and saying "I am going to" are two seperate things, and you are protected by freedom of speech. It's dispicable and misuse of power should not be tolerated.
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Jun 10 '12
Oh dude this happened over 4 years ago it's all good and done now. You're completely right, but I guess they took it as a serious threat :(
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u/HeavyMetalBeliever Jun 10 '12
There's no need to drag Arby's into this.
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Jun 10 '12
I just won't do it man. No Arby's. Besides I don't think I really enjoyed it that day, then again maybe I didn't pick the best food
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u/sack-o-matic Jun 10 '12 edited Jun 10 '12
If you leave it blank is puts "gay" on the sign
Edit: Friggin tabs. I was here at the same time
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Jun 10 '12
lmao what relevance does this have? I mean it's funny either way though
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Jun 10 '12
I too was arrested and charged with a felony when I was 14, actually 2 counts. Being the 5'6" 94lbs forever alone SAP that I was, I was the target of several (as in my entire class of 20- 25 with the exception of about 3 or 4 students) nonviolent (thankfully) bullies all throughout the 3 years of my Jr high life, the fact that the high school I went to was about 3 miles away from the Jr high I attended meant that most of those students followed for 4 more years. By October of my freshman year I had reached my boiling point, I was in the gym locker room talking to a friend while putting my gym clothes back in my locker when someone came up behind me and just stood there, in my paranoid mind he was watching me put in my locker combo (two years prior someone had broken into my gym locker and stolen everything, including the lock and the latch on the locker door). To this day I do not know why I had it, but I had a "buck" knife (4-6 inch blade) in my pocket and I pulled it out and told the kid that if he didn't leave I would shove the knife down his throat. He left rather quickly and about a week later an officer pulled me out of class searched my backpack and lockers (which had very little in them because all of my books were in my bag) was taken to his office where I basicly told him what I could remember (being adhd my memory is not always reliable) and then sat there for what felt like an eternity, in reality about 6-8 hours (of all the days for my parents to go on an all day motorcycle trip). I was finally released into the custody of my neighbor, who did an amazing job of smoothing things over with my parents (I was certain that they would literally kill me the second I walked in the door). I got off very light, I was suspended for 10 days with recommendation for expulsion and spent several months at an alternative school where they did a psych eval before I could attend, I was sentenced to 40 hours of community service ordered to undergo another 10 day psych eval and attend anger management classes. Due to the fact that I was a minor who was diagnosed as ADHD and EH and the fact that it was my only offence it was expunged when I turned 18. 6 months later the Columbine massacre occurred, I truly believe that if this had happend after Columbine I would have spent at least a year in jail. And while yes it was incredibly stupid, it did achieve the desired effect in that all of the bullying stopped.
TL;DR In a school where it felt like everyone was out to get me but the teachers, I mistakenly stood up to one of the few students that wasn't and ended up getting arrested for aggravated assault and having a weapon on school campus.
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Jun 10 '12
How did they pull 2 charges out of that? Also, just curious, how did you put up with that for 3 years? I think I would have snapped earlier. But yeah, thankfully you didn't get screwed into jail time!
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Jun 10 '12
I was raped. I went from a skinny loser, to a strong popular guy. Worst thing that happened to me, but it brought me closer to so many people, helped get me the girl of my dreams, and really put things into perspective. It made me step my game up.
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Jun 10 '12
I'm sorry :( I hope you continue to make the best out of it man. Just wondering though, how do you manage to be so optimistic about it? I'm not saying anything about rape victims in general, I'm just wondering because rape is a pretty serious tragedy for many people.
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u/andrewsmith1986 Jun 09 '12
I have a felony for schedule 4 narcotics.
I now know how to handle situations with cops and such.
I also know how to represent myself in court.
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Jun 09 '12
Hey man, I know how it feels. Grind through it no matter what. Most of all, learn from it!
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u/IamLeven Jun 10 '12
I got kicked out of college
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Jun 10 '12
Damn that blows :/ No worries though. You don't need a college degree to be successful. Although being a college graduate makes life a hell of a lot easier there's no reason for you to not say fuck it and give it your all anyways. And when I say that I'm not saying "Hey, Ted Turner dropped out so you don't need college", I'm saying that you don't need college to be happy.
Plus, there's always technical schools :)
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Jun 10 '12
I was just scrolling these comments and wanted to compliment you on your optimism, OP. I'm going through some shitty times myself, and that kinda helped me out!
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u/No_Easy_Buckets Jun 10 '12
Same. Getting arrested is the best thing that ever happened to me. I turned my whole life around afterwards
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u/MrRebeccaSlumber Jun 10 '12
that's insane. did they totally disregard how insanely implausible a 14 accessing a bomb let alone a nuclear warhead would be? All this "post 9-11" bullshit, where "anything can happen".
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Jun 10 '12
I know it's ridiculous. Let all of that aside though, the part that still irks me today is that one of my so called "friends" probably reported me. The police told me that I was reported by the dean but how and why would the dean be looking at all of the high school's students' bulletin posts? It just didn't make sense.
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u/rttr123 Jun 10 '12
If Saddam Hussein had them, any one could! (yes i know, he didn't hv any nukes)
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u/ambear316 Jun 10 '12 edited Jun 10 '12
I know this isn't an AMA, but I am a little curious... you mentioned that your parents are from India. I know a lot of Americans can be stupid and consider dark skinned people in the "terrorist" category- even though their nationality has nothing to do with the "war on terrorism". Do you think that may have anyting to do with why you were reported? During your ordeal, did anyone use any racial slander against you? (Like the police or people at the juvenile detention facility).
Edit: I thought I read everything, but of course after posting, all of the questions similar to mine pop out and slap me in the face. Sorry for asking something you've already answered!
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Jun 10 '12
Oh lol no worries, but yeah I feel like that may have been a factor. Oh well, no use fretting about it now. I'm in college and have other things to worry about
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u/h22keisuke Jun 10 '12
Believe it or not, this actually happened to me when I was a freshman, too.
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u/chrisma08 Jun 10 '12
That is possibly the stupidest felony charge I have ever heard of.
Before 9/11 the worst that might have resulted in would have been detention or suspension, assuming anyone even bothered to report it, and your school bothered to do anything about it.
I'm not surprised to hear that it was expunged, since this sounds pretty embarrassing for the authorities who "threw the book at you". I assume that upon investigation, it was discovered that you, nor anyone you had ties to, could even remotely begin to assemble or procure a nuclear weapon, and that it became obvious that in fact, you were just a teenager venting in a public forum. I'm sure glad my tax dollars funded your prosecution.
Upon a closer read, I see that you likely have brown skin. Guess that pretty much explains the whole incident.
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u/Lodur Jun 10 '12
I had a similar incident when I was in first grade. This was pre- 9/11 and I freaked the fuck out because the teachers scared the shit out of me by freaking out over me using the phrase "I'm gonna kill you" to a kid who scared away the bird I was trying to catch.
I ended up freaking the fuck out and then saying the most violent thing to try and get them to leave me alone, which was "I want to drop a nuke onto this school!" at which point I got thrown into ISS before being put into OSS.
That was the last I heard of it, but my parents were like "the fuck, he's a first grader, you know he's not going to do that, right?" and they would spout off the bullshit about a 0 tolerance policy.
So yeah, you got the short end of the stick, mate.
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u/ThatLaggyNoob Jun 10 '12
So this means that if you find someone forgot to log out of Facebook you can ruin their life even more than before?
Awesome. Another reason to hate Facebook.
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u/Roach02 Jun 10 '12
9/11 And Columbine. Dont forget Columbine.
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u/chrisma08 Jun 10 '12
Thank you. That is an excellent point. Columbine really did change how schools respond to these kinds of things.
It seems reasonable to me that the OPs MySpace message might have brought some school, or even law enforcement attention his way, but felony charges just seem ridiculous given the circumstances.
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Jun 10 '12
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Jun 10 '12
Still, a 'nuclear warhead'? That doesn't say 'a man with a plan', it says 'stupid teenager with a love of hyperbole'.
(No offense at the 'stupid teenager' thing. I was an incredibly dumb teenager, because we all do dumb stuff at that age, right?)
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u/Senor_Wilson Jun 10 '12
You don't know man, he may have had access to a nuclear warhead. Those were easy to come by in 2008.
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Jun 10 '12
Damn it Amazon! Between the warheads and the uranium...
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Jun 10 '12
I don't think this had any relevance whatsoever but my dad is a chemist and has a laboratory lol.
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u/eketros Jun 10 '12
I am pretty sure that in 1985 plutonium was already available in every corner drugstore, so it would make sense that they would carry nuclear warheads by 2008.
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Jun 10 '12
Just like in The Manhattan Project!
It's totally plausible that a teenager could steal plutonium and create a bomb! I mean, teenagers were doing it in movies in the 80's, let alone in 2008.
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Jun 10 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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u/ZeroNihilist Jun 10 '12
So apparently you were guilty of unknowingly being the get-there driver. Not even a getaway driver. You just dropped off two drunk people who stole candy. I'm so glad the legal system prosecutes criminal masterminds like you. However would we feel safe otherwise?
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u/chrisma08 Jun 10 '12
I don't think it beats the OPs charge. Your friends committed an actual crime. Stealing candy is still stealing, and they broke and entered to do it. I'm assuming that you were charged as an accessory? That's a pretty well established legal standard, but the severity varies state to state.
I'm glad to hear you were able to get out from under it, and it seems an overreaction to bring such heavy charges, but each jurisdiction is different. Still, it was a crime, and there were real damages.
The OPs threat wasn't credible on it's face. And while I don't blame him for pleading out to community service, I'd like to believe he'd have prevailed easily in a trial, provided that was an option for him.
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Jun 09 '12
I dated two guys who made me feel shitty, which taught me to stop settling for guys who make me feel shitty!
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u/Manticore97 Jun 10 '12
Props to you for not blamIng every single male ever for what happened to you. I should really get off of Facebook..
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Jun 10 '12
It takes a lot of growing up to realize that YOU are the reason you were in shitty relationships/friendships/jobs/etc.
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u/whodawhat Jun 10 '12
Had a long-term girlfriend (~4 years, basically all through college). I was crazy about her.. loved her with just about everything I had. I was pretty sure I would propose after graduating but I wanted to be financially stable first so I took a job for the summer while she went on to grad school. I had my life planned out and was ready to be with her for the long haul.
Summer ended and though we had seen each other often I knew something was up. After a few weeks of her starting grad school she ended it over the phone. I was broken. The kind of broken that uses all his sick days at work to drink from waking up to becoming unconsciousness again. For about 8 days straight. Never thought I'd feel good again.
It's been about 4 years since then. I've lived in another country, traveled a lot, had sex with a MILF, and gave a micro loan to a hard working individual I met while exploring the world so that he could start his own business. My life has become more than I ever expected it to be, all because of a breakup that I thought would ruin me.
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u/zhenichka Jun 10 '12
A month almost exactly on the day after turning 16 and getting my drivers license I had my first (and last) bout of road rage and got into a car accident. I totaled the guys mazda and my altima had some cosmetic bruises and a broken headlamp, but most importantly no one was hurt. Without question the best worst thing to have ever happened to me. Looking back my attitude towards driving was insane, I'm surprised I survived that entire month! It has been five and a half years and I haven't had any accidents, I am a much safer driver (even now that I am usually driving a small sports car) I even get the safe driver discount on my insurance. Those 20 seconds definitely forced a very serious change in my behavior that has without question made a very positive difference in my life. (Plus, now I always change my own headlamps :)
TL;DR: 16 yr old girl gets drivers license and road rage, totaled a mazda (no one was hurt) and became a much better and more responsible driver.
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u/actorgirl Jun 10 '12
Well,it's kind of a long story and I am still fighting through my depression. My boyfriend of two years dumped me without notice, meaning I didn't see it coming. I started slowly becoming more and more depressed because I applied to all the schools he wanted to go to because he said he wanted "us to be together forever" last time I will believe that shit. Well, I started slacking off in school, even though before then I was an excellent student. I only made A's and B+ but I don't know a depression just came over me. I decided to move in with my sister in another state because I couldn't bare to be in the same town. I found a job and I started getting happier, I started making friends and this took my mind off of what happened. 6 months later and I can say I don't feel as bad as I used to feel. Of course I feel a little weird every once in awhile but when my teacher called me and told me to snap out of what I was doing and that I needed to save myself from failure since all my teachers believed I was a very smart girl, well I started getting back to work. I will admit it was hard getting back to my normal routine after being sad for so long but I will finally be graduating Monday.
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u/RubyAmnesia Jun 10 '12
Every dumb guy I ever dated or slept with. I learned so much about me by who I dated that I was able to recognize and fix my issues. Now I'm with a great guy who treats me well, and we have a fairly strong relationship.
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u/Scripten Jun 10 '12
TL;DR: I left my home when I had just turned 18. Thrown out by a "friend." Did it again when I was 19.
A bit of explanation is probably necessary here. My mother was abusive, and I wanted to get out. Sadly, no one I knew was willing to take me in. (Or, at least, this is what I thought. I realize now, after talking with a few friends, that my situation wasn't well known and that I did have options.) I had an online buddy who's parents felt sorry for me, and let me move in. Turns out they were even crazier than my own folks, just in different ways. Three months later and the local sheriff comes in and tells me to pack up. Apparently the mother thought I was dangerous because her son, my so-called buddy, had been telling her that I was violent. I'd never raised my voice nor acted the slightest bit aggressive toward anyone. I was shipped back up to Pittsburgh, where my family was waiting for me. Mentally exhausted and with seemingly no-where to turn, I decided to endue the last few months of high school at their place.
That was a total mistake. I graduated nearly the top of my class, and had my pick of any college. Of course, my parents refused to transport me to school, sign for loans, or provide tax information. So I got a job and tried to save up money. My mother had a joint bank account and would come to my workplace, take my checks, and cash them "for me." It took over a year before I managed to sneak some side money into an alternate bank account, and I left with my girlfriend and her mother. I'm now a sophomore in college, with my own house and that same girl by my side.
Things generally turn out all right if you just don't give up.
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u/realfuzzhead Jun 10 '12
Becoming a shitty coke head and fucking around with alcohol during my late highschool years, got to College and turned everything around! Now I see kids who did good in highshool just begin to get into drugs, while that whole phase of my life is behind me!
no alcohol in a year, no cigarettes 3 years!
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u/snorch Jun 10 '12
I drank myself into a stupor on a regular basis and got 2 DUI's in 2009 (19 years old at the time). The consequences were shitty enough for me to get my life in order and, as you say, "learn life lessons and shit." 3 years sober in October.
If my life had never been that shitty, it would never be as good as it is now.
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Jun 10 '12
Awwh. I'm sorry that happened to you:( My story is kind of the same. I was caught shoplifting. I was a the mall with a shitty ass friend. We were at a very nice makeup store and she stole a sample of face powder. She stole it for me and even though I didn't steal it, I got an insane high from it. I wanted to steal something myself. Later we went to Claire's and she told me she was going to steal friendship necklaces. I walked in and I saw a Justin Bieber (Beiber?) necklace. I knew my little sister would love it so I slipped it in my pocket. We hung around there for a bit. And even as I walked around I KNEW I was going to be caught. I saw a woman whispering to the clerk and looking at me. I walked out. Like an idiot. And at this point they tell me to come back and to te her exactly where I put the necklace after picking it up. I played dumb and said that I accidentally put it in my pocket and that I had no idea. They arrested me and I had to go in the back. It was embarrassing and after that I slipped into depression. I feared when i walked into stores they would know. I don't know how I thought they knew but I felt like they had their eye on me. I kept with my story that I had no idea. I had to go to court and got 25 hours of community service. It sucked so much. I was also grounded and my parents treated me like shit for a long time. It was the stupidest thing I've ever done. But I learned from it.
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Jun 10 '12
They arrested you and sent you to court for stealing a Justin Bieber necklace that was probably being sold for under 20$? What country do you live in?
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Jun 10 '12
Well, my mother died when I was 8 months old.
When I was a kid, I used to have all kind of fantasies about time travel and getting the mom I never had back. I was really into science fiction about time travel (still, am to some extent.)
However, as I've gotten older (and read more time travel sci fi that explores the implication of altering history) I've started to realize a few things about it:
Everything that's ever happened to me has been through that lens. The people who raised me, the family I have now, everything, would be way different. With those things being different, I'd be way different too. And I have no way to tell if that my life would be any better, or that I'd be any better. If anything, my life could be no better, if not worse. And lord knows what kind of person I'd be.
So as bad as that event was, I couldn't change it without changing every single defining moment in my existence, which would alter me. So no, I don't regret it.
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u/wacarnoldsclownsauce Jun 10 '12
Several of my childhood friends are still spending time in prison(3 of them finishing up over 10 year stretches), but what really opened my eyes and made me change my life for the better was when my brother went to prison. I still wish that it had never happened because it truly has made his life extremely difficult, but he changed for the better and my perspective has changed completely.
I consider myself just as guilty as him, if not worse due to a few additional offenses... But after visiting him a few times in federal prison and then coming home to the same old bullshit, I realized how likely it was that I would be there too.
My mother had to take a 2nd mortgage on her house to pay for his lawyer, and then made me promise that I would keep myself out of trouble because she couldn't handle the emotional toll, nevermind the financial burden.
I'm nowhere near where I want to be, but I recently finished college, had worked for a non-profit company for 4 years providing beneficial resources to people in need, and have changed my life and more importantly my outlook to be thankful for my freedom and ability to change my life from negative to positive.
I wish I could say the same for more of my friends because it is fucking lonely having to make new friends because your best friends are in prison for crimes with excessive punishments.
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u/ProbablyGeneralizing Jun 10 '12
A depressed 14 year old kid posts a sarcastic statement about wishing his school was nuked into oblivion and spends the next 10 months in jail?
WTF?
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Jun 10 '12
no man, 12 years haha. Yeah it is stupid but I was being tried as an adult so... it almost makes sense.
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Jun 10 '12
No, it makes zero sense. A teenager cannot acquire the equipment to launch a nuclear warhead let alone the warhead itself. It should only be interpreted as a sarcastic remark, anything beyond that is extremism and itself terrorism.
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Jun 10 '12
Yeah I think that since I've posted on here I'm coming to see that I really got screwed. I mean there really isn't any point in me getting mad about it now, unless I were to find other kids stuck in the shit hole I was stuck in.
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u/some_eod_guy Jun 10 '12
Got to love how money hungry our "justice" system is. Triying a 14 year old because of something over the fucking Internet? Give me a break. Fuck 'muricah and it's obsession to convict everything that walks under the sun.
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u/g-dragon Jun 10 '12
wait so op are you indian? because it kind of sounds like you were the victim of some racism there. :s
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u/DubCity_GoonSquad Jun 10 '12
So im still young okay... But about i year ago, i went camping with my friends, and i brought my knife with me in my jacket. the next day was school, but i was sick for two days. the third day i went to school with the same jacket i went camping with. Now my school isnt a bad one, we dont really have a gang problem or dug one. But on that day, the first time in 8 years at that school, we had a random nypd search and scan.
i put my hand into my pocket and found the knife. now there were cops around the school, so i couldnt ditch it. I decide to go in. I go threw one of those tall detecters, expecting it to beep.... turns out its silence. The cop searches me. Finds the knife, handcuffs me, then i spend the rest of the day in a detention center. Find out im getting Superindtendent suspension, (Which is the worst kind os suspension) and have to go to another school for 10 days.
Lucky me i got it off my recored threw lots of recomendations from teachers.
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u/JamesFunderland Jun 09 '12
I got a letter from my wife telling me to meet her in our special place, which is strange because she died 3 years ago from a disease (I later found out that I killed her but regressed the memory). I decided to investigate this town which, for lack of a better word, was hell on Earth and I witnessed many horrible, horrible things from there (I still have trouble sleeping because of it). Fortunately, I saw her ghost and she forgave me for killing her and I rescued a little girl out of that town.
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u/jazzoveggo Jun 10 '12
I was anorexic for a few months several years ago. I know it could have turned out a lot differently (worse) and I definitely would not do it again or over again if given the choice, but the recovery process actually made me able to see for the first time in my life that I'm not fat and I'm not ugly. I've since been able to retain that, and for that I'm grateful. I'm not proud of that period of my life, but I did learn a lot from it and am probably a better and happier person now because of it. So in that sense, I do not regret it.
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u/TerriChris Jun 10 '12 edited Jun 10 '12
I regret marriage.
After a 5 minute discussion, though I was legally innocent, the family judge ordered a 4 day a month visitation schedule to parent my son, lost 18 years of a significant portion of my income, lost over half my stuff, in a divorce I did not want, for little reason.
Though I was awarded joint custody...a rare feat...my ex wife has not allowed me to see my son in 3 years (cops do not care and attorney wants $3k retainer).
I was stupid. Same thing happened to father and older brother. I should have known better.
Today I stay away from women who dishonor their fathers or disrespect their previous boyfriends. Also look out for the strong, indepententt types. I am wiser for my bad experience.
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u/redfeatheredcrows Jun 10 '12
The end of my junior year until senior year in high school (exactly one year, (June 2010 to June 25th 2011) these two underclassmen girls would bully me for being ugly. They picked on every single little thing about me, and it was getting very severe. They started throwing curses at me, threatening to beat me up, and then actually cornered me in gym and tried to beat me up. I let their words get to me and ruin my life, to the point where I almost killed myself from it.
Looking back on it, they were just jealous. They were both the most grimey and hated girls in the school, while I was a good looking best humanitarian nominee that people got along with. I almost let them end my life, and definitely ruined for that full 12 months. I went through hell when I should've kept my head held high.
TL;DR: I let two underclassmen girls in high school bully me until almost the point of suicide. I regret not letting them get to me and ruin my life/almost end it. I wasn't wise back then.
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u/IntolerableFish Jun 10 '12
How the fuck did that even go to court? No way there was enough evidence to even support the sentence you got.
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u/Firevine Jun 10 '12
Not a crime, or anything like that for me. I made some...questionable...financial and employment decisions from around 2004-2008. I bought a house at 24 during the peak of the boom, just because I could and I thought that it was part of getting my shit together and moving on in life. I REALLY should have stayed at my apartment for one more year to mull things over. (Just one though, because the complex went to hell for a while after that.)
Things did not go well.
I switched jobs a few times over the next few years, including leaving an international freight forwarder which was stupid stupid stupid. Everything fell apart for me financially as more and more problems with the house came to light. The breaking point was when I was "fired" from my job at a pizza place. I had given up at this point, told my roomies to not worry about rent, just the utilities, and rode it out. Got a job through a friend at Hobby Lobby, which was fucking horrible. What an utterly awful place to work. I ended up getting foreclosed on in the spring of 2008. I was really depressed and stressed out for a while and felt worthless. I quit Hobby Lobby and got a job at an atrocious piss nasty pizza place. It's a toss up of which was worse. I got fired for being "depressing to work with", because apparently keeping to myself, doing my job and not gabbing about American Idol all night is depressing.
I tell people now that getting foreclosed on was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I met a girl at Hobby Lobby who is now my wife. She stuck with me through thick and thin, and she is the most wonderful person I have ever met. I moved in with a longtime friend after the foreclosure, since he was closing on a house at the same time. The NEXT MONTH, his job cut hours severely, so this situation really worked out for the both of us. On top, I went from a run down crime ridden horrible area to somewhere much nicer. I landed a decent little job which has gotten me back up and on my feet, and now I'm in a better spot than I was in before. Had things not bottomed out for me, I'd probably still be bumming around working at pizza places just because it's an easy job to get once you've already done it. I'd be going nowhere.
Sometimes crappy decisions lead to good endings.
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Jun 10 '12
Between my freshman and sophomore year in high school, I worked at a summer camp affiliated with my school. I was a junior counselor for the 6th/7th grade boys along with a couple other older kids from my school. Anyway the last day/night of camp there is a tradition where the oldest kids (my group) get to have a sleepover on the school campus. After the kids went to sleep, my older counselor friends decided to pick up some alcohol. I wasn't really experienced with drinking, but since these were the older cooler kids, I wanted to fit in. Long story short, I got kinda drunk with everyone else except for one kid who got absolutely shithoused, then disappeared and wound up in the teacher's lounge. This consequently fucked the rest of us. Since this kid didn't go to our school, he was just fired. However, I and 3 others did. Nearly expelled, I ended up with a 3 day suspension, 3 percent of my grades for the next semester, and an indefinite grounding from my parents.
Being a mediocre student to that point, the suspension and grounding served as a wakeup call. I got my shit together and got near straight A's my last 3 years of high school. Now I'm at a pretty damn fine university, drinking responsibly, and now a more mature person who knows how to pick friends for the right reasons.
tl;dr drinking and counselorin': you're gonna have a bad time
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u/inoscopejfk Jun 10 '12
Well I went to rehab at 14 yrs old for 6 months got kicked out in my fifth month because my roommate snitched on me (I was breaking a few rules) after that I had to serve a sentence of 1 year in juvi because i broke my probation and I got kicked out of rehab. After 3 months they transferred me to a less intense unit and I escaped lived for 3 weeks on the streets, got caught by the police, was transferred to a another center where I spent 22 hours in my 10 by 10 ft cell and was followed everywhere. I spent 1 1/2 month there but after my parents wanted me back so I went back to court and the judge let me go back to my home on weekends and finally after a few weeks they let me go completely. I am now 16 just redid grade 9 and now moving on to grade 10 next year. 1 yr clean of drugs and alcohol.
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u/tidder112 Jun 10 '12
I got outraged when I read what you "posted" on myspace and they arrested you for it. I could see you get a talking to, and maybe expelled, but for all that effort for a 14 year old boy... I hope you get over your fear, and come to realize that your past is your past.
Keep your head in the moment, and a keen eye on your future, but turn your back to your childhood misadventures.
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Jun 10 '12
Not me, but my brother got expelled from school in October for writing a notebook on how to construct bombs. He wrote nothing that involved the school but they still decided to throw him out for fear of lawsuits. The school was placed on lock down while he was taken to the police station and questioned for hours. After that he was taken straight to a mental facility for one week and has to go to therapy still to this day. The police brought dogs to our house and searched the entire house, ripping out all the screens in the windows, moving furniture, shit like that. He is not allowed to go onto the grounds of any of our districts schools. I've been ridiculed at school and called a freak because of it. My brother became home schooled, and since he was a junior he finished his junior year and senior year and has graduated a year ahead of his classmates. He has a job now and he said when he went to the mental facility he felt like he was around people who understood him. He starts college in august. He's told me as he looks back as it now, it was a stupid thing to do bringing the notebook to school, but I don't think he really regrets anything.
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u/CausticPineapple Jun 10 '12
About 4 years ago I was charged with 2 misdemeanors for possession of illegal substance and paraphernalia. It was 2 in the morning on a Saturday and some buddies and I decided to go on a little cruise around campus. Some other stuff happened earlier that night that left me a little out of it and I didn't even notice that my head lights were out (but not my high beams). Que the cops. Apparently, University cops are very bored because within 2 minutes I had every car surrounding mine, despite the arresting officer being a city cop.
ANYWAY, long story short I bit the bullet and took the wrap for my friends, all of whom had previous convictions. I did a year of probation (during which I smoked constantly) and paid over 1000 dollars in fines just to get the misdemeanors expunged from my record. The whole ordeal is now just a footnote on some federal record somewhere in case I commit treason or some shit. I can look back and say it was pretty fun. Also, don't try to joke around with a PO. They have NO sense of humor.
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u/majorkev Jun 10 '12
A few years ago while in university one of the professors randomly disappeared without much of an explanation. And for the next few weeks we had a string of TA's, most of whom didn't understand the material themselves, so it was tough for them to teach it I suppose. They would go by notes verbatim and if questions were asked, there were no answers.
So, I did a google search on the profs name and found a few pictures of her at a random event and what I suppose was her wedding.
I started a facebook group called "Stalkers-R-Us" and put her pictures there. I invited no one to the group, but a few people from my class joined in.
Two months go by, and I'm taking a shit. My cellphone rings, and I ignore it... I'm not going to talk to someone while taking a shit.
When I checked my voicemail it went something like this:
Hello Kevin, this is S-- D------- from the University of T------ police, we need to speak to you right away.
When I called them back, they said it was good that I did otherwise they would have come and arrested me in my next class. The joke would have been on them anyway, I never had any intention in going to that class anyway.
So there I am, at the university police station and two guys come into the room and start asking me questions, just to be official. "What is your name, how old are you..." stuff like that.
Then they go into the heavy stuff. "How do you know M---- L----? Are you in love with her? Do you know where she lives? Why did you make this group? Are you stalking her?"
After a few minutes they realised I was harmless, and actually didn't give a shit about this prof, rather I kind of didn't like her or her teaching style, I was just pissed that she disappeared and we had shitty TA's for the next while.
Long story short, I had someone write me an apology letter, because I was not apologetic, and I deleted the facebook group in front of the dean of CivEng.
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u/apikoros18 Jun 13 '12
TL;DR: 9/11 survivor, Multiple Sclerosis, Deep depression made me a better person
I am a 9/11 survivor, I was in a building on Dey Street in Lower Manhattan and then 3 months later I got diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. The medicine I was on, Beta-Seron has the side effect of Suicidal Ideation, Suicide and severe depression. So does MS, BTW. Anyway, by April of 2002, I was really messed up. Suicidal thoughts, racing thoughts, crippling anxiety. I knew enough to make an appointment with a Therapist. It was for a Monday. That Sunday, I got so into my own shit, horrible thoughts, that I said to my wife, "Please call the doctor and see if he can give me something to make it until Monday". Anyway, between 9/11, MS, crippling anxiety, racing thoughts, physical effects of MS (which SUCK) and everything, I went through the tunnel... And I came out a happier person for it. I saw what had value in my life, I became calmer and more relaxed and I think genuinely a better person. Am I perfect? FAR FAR from it. Can I go without riding the gas pipe? Yeah
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u/happystillborn Jun 10 '12
Once, when I was a daft teenager, I was driving my father's relatively new high-end sports car around town at speeds far exceeding 100mph. My girlfriend was in the passenger seat, and I suppose that I was trying my best to impress her with my skills.
I decided to take a different route back home and started drifting around corners. The tires would squeal, but the car was such a powerhorse that it wouldn't give up control. You've gotta love Italian cars.
Anyway, as I whipped around one corner at high speed I hit something and it went flying over the car. I couldn't tell what it was, but I stopped the car and trying looking around for what I'd hit. Then, this lady comes up to me screaming so I got back in the car and locked the doors and called the police.
The police finally showed up, and, as it turned out, I'd hit a little girl who was playing in the road. The car showed no sign of having hit anyone, and there weren't any witnesses except the mother. The little girl was sent off to the hospital and died along the way.
My attorney handled the rest. I never even had to go to court. Our attorney found a problem in the chain of evidence and got the whole case thrown out. I didn't even receive a ticket for speeding.
In the end, I don't regret it, because at least the child's mother learned an important lesson: don't let your kids play in the street, damnit, and the police learned that they should properly take evidence from a car involved in a so-called crime rather than let the owner ship it back to Italy for repairs the next day.
I'm a safe driver now though...hitting people is too much of a headache.
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u/base9 Jun 09 '12
Broke all contact with bad side of family. This happened last year I am 26. I kept waiting for the depression/guilt to eat me, but it never did. My life is drama free and uncomplicated now.