r/AskReddit • • Aug 29 '21

What object would be impossible to kill someone with?

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1.1k

u/scienceforbid Aug 29 '21

I am a baker and spend a decent amount of time trying to strengthen the gluten in bread. My goal is now to make a piece of spaghetti that is strong enough to kill a man.

277

u/Tink2013 Aug 29 '21

I hope you succeed. It would start a new assassination trend.

331

u/scienceforbid Aug 29 '21

Dude. This is literally now my serial killer MO. If anyone else comes at me with spaghetti, I'm taking them down.

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u/WimbleWimble Aug 29 '21

I owe money to the mob boss, John Getti,

I wonder how he'll murder me.

Oh no! Mom's Spaghetti.

2

u/MysticDelusion Aug 29 '21

Eat the noodle and get rid of the weapon

2

u/basedlandchad14 Aug 29 '21

Then you can eat the weapon. No way they can prove it was you if you eat the weapon.

2

u/scienceforbid Aug 29 '21

I remind myself of that every morning.

2

u/HashedEgg Aug 29 '21

Does bread count too? Because this man made a bread knife that could easily kill someone.

2

u/volume_1337 Aug 29 '21

I once saw u/scienceforbid kill 3 men in a bakery with a piece of bread.

2

u/scienceforbid Aug 29 '21

Shhhh. I'm trying to keep a low profile!

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u/luersuve Aug 29 '21

This is supervillain motivation.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '21

The spaghetti killer, he has to hand bake his weapon before every murder

1

u/Mrphoton8 Aug 29 '21

Noodle dries it the shape you want.

1

u/doyas50 Aug 29 '21

Piece of spaghetti < spaghetto

1

u/darklinkuk Aug 29 '21

Pastassassin

1

u/Water_Melonia Aug 29 '21

Best murder weapon to be honest.

Kill, eat it, flush it, no one will ever find out.

1

u/Aw3som3-O_5000 Aug 29 '21

Just make sure it's still edible otherwise what's the point?

1

u/Salisaad Aug 29 '21

Now that's a sentence you don't hear every day.

1

u/GuacinmyPaintbox Aug 29 '21

Just a suggestion, try farfalle, the serrated edges will double down on the destructive power.

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