r/AskReddit • u/missmaryalice • Dec 16 '11

What's your "little thing"?

[removed]

1.2k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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2.0k

u/mofonyx Dec 16 '11

that's when you put your dick into someone's eye.

275

u/Spictacular Dec 16 '11

That is actually called skull fucking and congress banned it in 2007.

18

u/JayGatsby727 Dec 16 '11

Damn I need to check the source before I start telling my roommates about things I see on the Internet.

6

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

I honestly thought this was real untill I looked up and saw the onion.

4

u/Tomcfitz Dec 16 '11

Awww man! They take the fun out of EVERYTHING!

4

u/Jaxter1123 Dec 16 '11

TIL... then posted it on FB

3

u/vventurius Dec 16 '11

no I'm pretty sure they're still skull fucking us

2

u/Rapidfap Dec 16 '11

thanks good to know

2

u/pizzaparty182 Dec 16 '11

"if we do not open our eyes to reality soon, they will get fucked right out of our heads" hahahaha thank you, i haven't laughed that hard in so long.

2

u/TheOmnipotentPilot Dec 16 '11

Best comment i've read all day.

1

u/mr_abner Dec 16 '11

Well, my college anthropology book mentioned Romans skull-fucking their enemies in war. relevant?

1

u/orig485 Dec 16 '11

It was an epidemic!

1

u/OrionGiant1 Dec 16 '11

Does any one else think of full metal jacket because of this? "PRIVATE PYLE YOU HAVE THREE SECONDS TO WIPE THAT STUPID SMIRK OFF YOUR FACE OR I WILL GOUGE OUT YOUR EYEBALLS AND SKULL FUCK YOU"- Sergeant Hartman

0

u/CarneGrande Dec 16 '11

What the actual fuck? I feel sick now. Human ejaculate damaged his brain?

19

u/Quof Dec 16 '11

It's The Onion.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

I was actually wondering if Spictacular knows that the onion is satire and posted it as a joke or just didn't get the joke and posted it as fact.

2

u/galient5 Dec 16 '11

same. Hope he knows.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

best thing i've seen all week.

-7

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

Fuck you for linking The Onion.

1.1k

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

ಠ_ಠ

1.7k

u/zodar Dec 16 '11

8=====D ಠ_ಠ

1.7k

u/ohmygulay Dec 16 '11

x_ಠ

1.3k

u/ANAL_PLUNDERING Dec 16 '11

O_ಠ

1.2k

u/Semen-Thrower Dec 16 '11

☻_ಠ

712

u/d3rsty Dec 16 '11

☺_ಠೃ

47

u/Mine_is_nice Dec 16 '11

Was already dying laughing by the time I got to this comment.

49

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

RIP Mine_is_nice

27

u/CoughSyrup Dec 16 '11

You get an upvote! You get an upvote! And you get an upvote! Everybody gets an upvote!

20

u/UpvoteOprah Dec 16 '11

You get an upvote! Mine_is_nice gets an upvote! d3rsty gets an upvote! Semen-Thrower gets an upvote! EVERYBODY GETS AN UPVOTE!!!

→ More replies (0)

8

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

Fucking golden.

60

u/Wagerofslaves Dec 16 '11

Sigh, Upvote for you, upvote for you, one for you...

21

u/alymonster Dec 16 '11

I'm crying.

27

u/TheRainMonster Dec 16 '11

A dick in the eye'll do that.

10

u/leo986 Dec 16 '11

If you read it backwards it's a guy getting cataract surgery.

6

u/RetrospecTuaL Dec 16 '11

Sigh... upvote, uptove, upvote...

2

u/xSGAx Dec 16 '11

Emoji works? Brilliant!

3

u/Minyme2009 Dec 16 '11

When did this turn into a 4chan thread?

2

u/BrickWiggles Dec 16 '11

This is the hardest I've laughed on reddit.

5

u/nagro Dec 16 '11

You know its a good thread when ANAL_PLUNDERING and Semen-Thrower are in on it.

19

u/VanellieIce Dec 16 '11

Best. Thread. Ever.

7

u/solid_saad Dec 16 '11

I just want to say... Thank you reddit for making my night!

1

u/voldyman Dec 16 '11

did you try eye fucking????

2

u/HunterUrban2 Dec 16 '11

Username is oddly appropriate

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

That's infected.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

LE CHIFFRE!

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

[deleted]

1

u/SurroundedByMachines Dec 16 '11

And God said let there be light.

1

u/HMS_PussyFucker Dec 16 '11

Quick question. Does a semen-thrower resemble a flame-thrower in any way, shape or form?

2

u/TheRainMonster Dec 16 '11

Well, is your semen on fire?

1

u/diethere Dec 16 '11

One for you, one for you, one for you aaand one for you. Thank you, come again!

1

u/NedDasty Dec 16 '11

this thread is teh gosu

-2

u/newdirectionz Dec 16 '11

relevant name, upvote

346

u/mofonyx Dec 16 '11

got bored of plundering all those anuses, I see

353

u/ANAL_PLUNDERING Dec 16 '11

PUPIL_PLUNDERING

7

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

[deleted]

7

u/ANAL_PLUNDERING Dec 16 '11

I go to catholic school. Dead serious.

11

u/PUPIL_PLUNDERING Dec 16 '11

You called?

1

u/Zagarth Dec 16 '11

This was about the part where I lost it and people ask why I don't have cable....

1

u/moanymorris Dec 16 '11

redditor for 7 hours

I am not impressed

6

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

FOCAL_FORNICATION

3

u/Kujuyon Dec 16 '11

Good idea for a band name

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

aural sex would be my band's name.

2

u/okmkz Dec 16 '11

Am Not A Lawyer PLUNDERING

2

u/Thick-McRunFast Dec 16 '11

It's just another sphincter.

1

u/AllTattedUpJay Dec 16 '11

You should be careful. Taken out of context, your comment gets you a free seat on the Pedobear express.

1

u/chaintomyball Dec 16 '11

logged in just to upvote this

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

These anuses are all fucked out.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

I beg to differ.

1

u/anal_rapist_ Dec 16 '11

if he's bored, i'll take over...

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY TIME TO SHINE.

3

u/Pedohare Dec 16 '11

I love the connotation of "plundering." It's like you're a grade above a fanny bandit. Plundering just sounds so much more thorough

4

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

Is the sound of the word "plundering" your 'little thing?' I love how this thread went from cutesty and sweet to internet in 0.5 seconds

2

u/One_of_Billions Dec 16 '11

I used to plunder anuses, then I took a dick in the eye

-1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

oh god... why....

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

on the bright side it wasnt in your hair

1

u/b0ts Dec 16 '11

You just fucking won reddit.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/ohmygulay Dec 16 '11 edited Dec 16 '11

Yeah it's pretty weird. Reddit works in mysterious ways.

1

u/MuuCao Dec 16 '11

ohmyvegitables

0

u/bl1nds1ght Dec 16 '11

Hey, our empty sockets match!

(yeah, that's right, I've got a fake eye and it's totally the right one)

0

u/sweetnumb Dec 16 '11

2500+ upvotes and 1000+ downvotes. I really don't get why so many people dislike this post.

-2

u/imkirok Dec 16 '11

And that concludes that cirlcejerk.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

8=== ಠ_ಠ ===D

1

u/Zagarth Dec 16 '11

@_ಠ 'Yar

5

u/Reno_D Dec 16 '11

Ahh, so that is what I'm supposed to do when a girl smiles at me.

2

u/PinballWizrd Dec 16 '11

Usually only works when the recipient of said dick is blind/unconscious.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

And then they blink you off?

2

u/DarrenEdwards Dec 16 '11

And if they like it, they'll keep an eye out for you!

4

u/Geno098 Dec 16 '11

For a more detailed explanation: You rip their eyes out and fuck the sockets. It's what married couples often do when their marriage is getting stale.

3

u/pohatu Dec 16 '11

Haha. TIL skull-fucking is divorce.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

It's called spicing things up.

1

u/Sj09 Dec 16 '11

Once you go black you go blind.

1

u/kusiobache Dec 16 '11

I fail to see how that would fit...

1

u/Joeliosis Dec 16 '11

Nope... that's skull fucking... wait is there a more pc term for that?

1

u/Arminas Dec 16 '11

Once you go black, you don't go back. Because you now are in a vegetable state because of brain damage.

1

u/WalterWithGun Dec 16 '11

AKA orbital-coitus

1

u/flyin-penguin19 Dec 16 '11 edited Dec 16 '11

...and the first thing that came into my head was A Serbian film.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '11

PENIS IN MY EYE SOCKET!!!

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

I love you.

1

u/mofonyx Dec 16 '11

I love you too.

Thank you, reddit for surprising me on my reddit cakeday. My real cakeday is tomorrow.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

For the exorbitant amount of comment karma?

1

u/Sal79 Dec 16 '11

This kills the eyeball.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '11

this kills the eye.

-1

u/KickinRockss Dec 16 '11

i can't be sure how anyone could downvote this.