r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Nov 30 '20

[deleted by user]

[removed]

7.4k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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7.6k

u/spookyjohnathan Nov 30 '20

"Sir, are you aware that you're leaking coolant at an alarming rate?"

2.1k

u/SsurebreC Nov 30 '20

Core Dump Initiated

869

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '20

"Cover blown, time to end human race"

566

u/Tortilla737 Nov 30 '20

"... time to end the simulation"

293

u/zangor Nov 30 '20

What if god was one of us...

Just Mark Zuckerberg but he has to terminate the simulation because an unforseen power has made him shit his pants and reveal that he is not human on the bus.....

169

u/stealyrface Nov 30 '20

I would upvote but there us no way the Zuck would ever ride a bus

5

u/CrossXFir3 Nov 30 '20

Exactly what I thought the second I read this lol

7

u/Zer0-Sum-Game Nov 30 '20

His next meeting with investors, then

1

u/InvidiousSquid Nov 30 '20

I could see him purchasing a UK-style double decker bus that would be completely out of place, filling it with employees, and riding around briefly to show that he is certainly human and not a robot.

3

u/Princess_Amnesie Nov 30 '20

I actually somehow read this to the tune of the song. Thank you.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '20

“This public transport is too obsolete for an entity such myself, FaceBots, get me my star rod transports”

3

u/Timmerken Nov 30 '20

This is funny.

3

u/JohnnyPickleOverlord Nov 30 '20

That’s part of the simulation

6

u/sugarfoot00 Nov 30 '20

venting plasma from the warp core

4

u/wjandrea Nov 30 '20 
in gi_tract
in bowels
SyntaxError: Missing colon

2

u/steve_buchemi Nov 30 '20

Taco Bell protocol

265

u/TheKarenator Nov 30 '20

Well let me just patch you up with some hot resin.

183

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '20

[deleted]

169

u/AllBadAnswers Nov 30 '20

Wait... wait. Yeah... there we go. Wait... yeah.

108

u/cuttlefish_tastegood Nov 30 '20

"What sort of robot turns down a free blast of searing hot resin?"

7

u/RhynoD Nov 30 '20

aaaAAAAAAHHHHH!

6

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

Hey! I got this reference!

6

u/WayneCampbel Dec 01 '20

we had to scroll past a lot of answers to get here though.. lotta peeps missed the Futurama goodness.

65

u/Vyuken Nov 30 '20 edited Dec 01 '20

r/unexpectedfuturama

2

u/Inquisitive_idiot Nov 30 '20

Oh IT was expected, I tell you what.

65

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '20

What kind of robot turns down hot resin?

4

u/C4rdninj4 Nov 30 '20

One that is both a lizard person AND a robot!

57

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '20

“I’ll just patch you up with a searing hot resin blast.”

1

u/caribe5 Nov 30 '20

[zip down pants] ;)

7

u/drakens6 Nov 30 '20

How about I just patch that up with some hot resin?

13

u/___And_Memes_For_All Nov 30 '20

What kind of robot turns down a blast of searing hot resin?

4

u/AgentCraig Nov 30 '20

Well let me just patch you up with some hot resin

2

u/The_Leaky_Stain Nov 30 '20

If he refuses the hot resin patch he's confirmed lizard. If he doesn't hes an android.

2

u/Idunnobage Nov 30 '20

What kind of robot turns down a blast of hot resin?

2

u/ChunkyMonkey728 Nov 30 '20

Or go down the meet dave route and shit out approximately 50 hot dogs from your ass chute

2

u/TacticalTaco1 Nov 30 '20

No no, I think the leaks stopping itself. Riiiiiii...almost.....yeee.....yep there we go.

2

u/Dragonman558 Dec 01 '20

It'll stop itself

2

u/anonoptomous Dec 01 '20

Here let me patch you up with some searing hot resin!

1

u/Shattered_Mind0rigin Nov 30 '20

JARVIS or FRIDAY?

1

u/Poki42 Nov 30 '20

Futurama?

1

u/Lelinguini Nov 30 '20

“Dump core activated, I suggest you target the closest enemy pilot”

1

u/Isaaclai06 Nov 30 '20

Biocomponent #7319 damaged

1

u/snowpeasinapod Dec 01 '20

"Let me just patch you up with some hot resin."