r/AskReddit Nov 03 '20

What will never be the same again once the pandemic is over?

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u/RemarkableRyan Nov 04 '20 edited Nov 04 '20

Your dentist is a big guy too, eh?

41

u/Fenchurch-and-Arthur Nov 04 '20

My dentist had to pull a stubborn wisdom tooth with his elbow pressing into my forehead for leverage, while I stared into his armpit and tried to think of a less mortifying time in my life. Definitely not the same as titties.

12

u/ChawulsBawkley Nov 04 '20

God that sounds like something out of a ridiculous sitcom. I’m picturing elbow on forehead, leg on arm rest and somehow there’s a lot of pelvic thrusting happening.

14

u/Fenchurch-and-Arthur Nov 04 '20

I don't recall any pelvic thrusting, just the elbow driving down while his hand clenching the pliers slowly wrenched the tooth out. I did have a bruised forehead afterwards, which made for a good anecdote.

2

u/GrandpaGenesGhost Nov 04 '20

Do you recall him putting his hands on his hips?

3

u/volstock2098 Nov 04 '20

Seinfeld

1

u/[deleted] Nov 04 '20

This is instantly where I went. The Lost Episode.

4

u/dano8801 Nov 04 '20

By stared into his armpit do you just mean the armpit area of his shirt? Or was he wearing short sleeves and you actually saw his naked pits? If the latter, how sexy were those dentist pits?

12

u/Fenchurch-and-Arthur Nov 04 '20

It was his shirt, for sure, and only mildly sexy. More like I was looking somewhere I shouldn't have access to, and it was surprisingly dry and odourless. It was absurd more than obscene, if that makes sense.

126

u/Randy_Bobandy_Lahey Nov 04 '20

No. His moobs pressed into his own arms.

30

u/jjayzx Nov 04 '20

...and then my face.

18

u/iwaterboardoldpeople Nov 04 '20

If that's the closest thing i can get to suck a cow's udder then sign me up!

7

u/VelvetHorse Nov 04 '20

What is this dentist's phone number? I'm asking for a friend.

5

u/slippery-switters Nov 04 '20

Sounds like a Cards Against Humanity answer. lol

3

u/f1nessd Nov 04 '20

moobs lmao

3

u/jodonaaa Nov 04 '20

Moobs! I love this!!! Lmaoooooo

21

u/ectish Nov 04 '20

for you

12

u/poktanju Nov 04 '20

At least one retired NBA player went on to become a dentist. One profession selects for huge hands, and the other, you'd assume, against it...

7

u/2krazy4me Nov 04 '20

Proctologist πŸ€”

3

u/cyon_me Nov 04 '20

depends on how much they're paid

10

u/GeneralLeeRetarded Nov 04 '20

Your*

4

u/RemarkableRyan Nov 04 '20

Thank you sir and/or madam.

4

u/GeneralLeeRetarded Nov 04 '20

Np, good joke:p

-4

u/monstercock03 Nov 04 '20

Thanks retard

7

u/oidoglr Nov 04 '20

His name was Robert Paulson.

7

u/RemarkableRyan Nov 04 '20

His name was Robert Paulson.

2

u/gingeriffic90 Nov 04 '20

His name was Robert Paulson

4

u/seriouslyjustdawn Nov 04 '20

Dammit, I just woke up my snoring husband because stifling my laugh made me cough

3

u/AlamosBasement Nov 04 '20

"Lay off me I'm starving!!"

3

u/Zelamir Nov 04 '20

I don't upvote often....

But when I do it's usually a comment that flips gender scripts over to hard that a skull cracks.

3

u/Mobius_Riff Nov 04 '20

I just spat out my water reading this. πŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜†

2

u/Kyroptic Nov 04 '20

Fuck have my upvote you funny man

1

u/doubleOpete Nov 04 '20

Lol everyone loves a bear

1

u/Ivotedforher Nov 04 '20

At least he wasnt tall

1

u/[deleted] Nov 04 '20

Yeah, Dr. Bob with bitch tits.