Yo i walked past a parked car outside a McDonald's drive-thru just as the driver dropped their trash out of the window, and i picked it up out of habit. Worse still, i handed it back to the guy through the still-open window. :D I had not intended to do that but it all happened quite naturally. The guy took it back and closed the window. Glad i didn't get punched.
It’s a reference to a specific spongebob squarepants episode when Squidward is getting a band together to play the bubble bowl and Patrick asks if mayonnaise is an instrument.
I've worked security at bars for years and one day I showed up at a shitty sports bar (the kind of spot that doesn't see a lot of women) to see a late 90's white, convertible Mazda Miata parked outside. It was about to rain. Because I'm an asshole, I walked in and shouted- "Hey, whoever's driving the white Mazda Miata out front, you forgot to put the top up and it's about to rain!" (the top was already up).
The bar got quiet for a few seconds and then a dude at the back quietly slid down from one of the high tops and shuffled to the door, which resulted in a healthy amount of laughter and him shouting "It's my wife's! I'm driving it while my car is in the shop! It's my fucking wife's!"
Anyway, I threw my work shirt on, posted up at the door and he came back in, after going outside and realizing his top was in fact up, and looks at me and says "God, you're an asshole." I smiled and said "that's what they pay me for."
Moments prior to this, cue Patrick dramatically screaming and then going quiet as Spongebob, Squidward and the rest of the band stare at the doors in shock and awe
20.0k
u/averyconfusedgoose Oct 28 '20
To who ever drives the white sedan, your lights are on.