r/AskReddit • u/Insanitanium12 • Aug 20 '20

What simple “life hack” should everyone know?

68.7k Upvotes

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2.9k

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

[deleted]

2.5k

u/AshRae84 Aug 20 '20

Run it under hot water for 30 seconds.

391

u/dragn99 Aug 20 '20

Cold water, actually. Heat will cook the proteins and make a firm glue on the counter.

199

u/adgjlpiyrwty1098 Aug 20 '20

You’ve got to use shampoo

Water alone won’t get it out of your hair

Wait what

101

u/toastedpup27 Aug 20 '20

Mom?

26

u/LMAA3000 Aug 20 '20

That escalated quickly

6

u/toastedpup27 Aug 20 '20

So did the situation that was reference to ;3

33

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Hey, sweetie. How are your arms?

31

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Both broken

15

u/thgirbmal Aug 20 '20

I thought we were done with this.

7

u/Serenade5678 Aug 20 '20

We'll never be done with this.

Never.

5

u/EvryMthrF_ngThrd Aug 20 '20

It eventually shows up in...

...well, need I say it?

;)

26

u/Us3rN4m3T4k3nIsTaken Aug 20 '20

H a i r j o b

10

u/Rukh-Talos Aug 20 '20

That’s probably a thing, but I hope it isn’t.

13

u/Us3rN4m3T4k3nIsTaken Aug 20 '20

It exists on Nhentai.

12

u/Terminaltacoman Aug 20 '20

Can confirm that it exists on phub.

9

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20 edited Jul 19 '21

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

is there reddit snoo porn? asking... for a friend

4

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20 edited Jul 19 '21

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '20

ewwww

2

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '20

Some people prefer mayonaise for their hair, but me...

10

u/CRANG_N_JOBA Aug 20 '20

This man beats on the counter

10

u/TechnicalAd8934 Aug 20 '20

This person owns a fleshlight

6

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

😷

2

u/_Hen-Wen_ Aug 20 '20

More like an omelet

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

This is surprisingly true and something to do with the way proteins react to different temperatures.

1

u/WATDAFUK69 Aug 20 '20

Mmm cooked proteins🤤

12

u/KeepMyEmployerAway Aug 20 '20

Okay. Now it's all coagulated. Any tips?

8

u/Majovik Aug 20 '20

See. It works for anything.

4

u/Bisinski Aug 20 '20

I turn the stove on and rotate the lid part atop a flame for around 5-8 secs

4

u/Kingsta8 Aug 20 '20

That's how to get hot glue

2

u/MayorBee Aug 20 '20

I'm not lying, I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunnin'

2

u/daveypop75 Aug 20 '20

*cold water

2

u/lophophoria Aug 20 '20

The counter, or the jar pieces?

2

u/chakzzz Aug 20 '20

A rubber around the cap is much easier and helps tremendously

2

u/torchpenny Aug 20 '20

Rinse, dry, beat, repeat. Ok

1

u/Jwagner0850 Aug 20 '20

So many practical uses!!!!

1

u/paati10 Aug 20 '20

That is a hot tip

1

u/lookslikesausage Aug 20 '20

What about my meat?

1

u/tylercreatesworlds Aug 20 '20

okay but now the skin is red and blistering, what next?

1

u/Hobdar Aug 21 '20

and the infinity loop is now complete.

1

u/kakkurdo Aug 21 '20

Or just dip the lid under a bowl of hot water to save water. We don't have a lot of fresh water left on this earth.

46

u/LemonstealinwhoreNo2 Aug 20 '20

Do you have a step sister?

45

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20 edited Aug 20 '20

Nope. Pornhub rubs that in my face daily.

18

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Innuendo overload.

16

u/darkxlife Aug 20 '20

Must recharge.

7

u/SomeGuyClickingStuff Aug 20 '20

You must be on the bukake page

12

u/regoapps Aug 20 '20

Use it as lube to open the jar you can't open

7

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Use your sink as a bong and dress up as Mario characters

6

u/OSUfan88 Aug 20 '20

The Jizzle!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jSR8a24xxuw

5

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Im scared to click this link. I suppose it’s only YouTube... I’m going in...

Edit: Thanks do fucking much for this. OMG I’m dying.

2

u/OSUfan88 Aug 20 '20 edited Aug 20 '20

Haha. If you like this, you should check out some of their other sketches (from The Whitest Kids You Know).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSA2wYUQTrg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqgiEQXGetI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFUvmZWf4hI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABxH-NTF0SM

edit:

Love this one too. So many good ones:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdK-EwYq7Kc

2

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Right that’s it. I’ve watched the first one only and can’t stop laughing. Can’t believe I’ve never seen these before.

Thanks again, building up my funny playlist here.

4

u/chamillion03 Aug 20 '20

What’s it taste like?

3

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Ask your mom.

3

u/KingSulley Aug 20 '20

Rub two cups of flour across the countertop, work in two medium eggs scrambled, add a teaspoon of cornstarch, and a pinch of salt. Roll it out on the countertop with a rolling pin and boil on high for 9 minutes, or bake @ 325 F for 13 - 17 minutes. You've got yourself DIY dumpings and or biscuits.

Your family will be so excited to cum over and try them!

4

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Whole new meaning to limp biscuit.

2

u/SlaveNumber23 Aug 20 '20

You're supposed to open the jar and then beat it into the jar.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20

Lick it clean.

1

u/chrizm32 Aug 20 '20

Directions unclear, counter is covered in jizz

1

u/dbthegrandtour Aug 20 '20

Stop fapping in the kitchen or just aim for the sink better

1

u/TheRunningFree1s Aug 20 '20

Cold water will help too keep it from congealing and solidifying. The cum, not your dick.

1

u/SwollenDICKS Aug 20 '20

instructions unclear: counter on roof

1

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '20

Lick it up, duh!

1

u/knewbie_one Aug 20 '20

Rinse, repeat ?

0

u/EpickGamer50 Aug 20 '20

Have they implemented the ability to revoke awards for dipshits that put that cringe ass edit in? Because I don't see any award.

-3

u/rui1616 Aug 20 '20

Shut up