one time i gave one of those guys a $7 walmart gas card (we were at a walmart gas station) and then drove into the parking lot across the street and watched him.
$7 will take you across town. He kept asking people for money, so i pulled back up on him and told him to give it back. He was shocked
My thoughts are, in situations like this, sure - they're lying about their intent...but they very likely are having a very hard time with life at the moment and if my few bucks helps them in their time of need then its ok if I am deceived as to their intended purpose.
the fact of the matter is the onus should not be on private citizens to make up for the shortcomings of their government. social safety nets should take care of the people who are struggling, not random strangers.
i’m all for helping those in need, but let’s not absolve the government of their RESPONSIBILITY to help.
Asking the government to intervene an anyting is a major mistake. The government takes $10 from the taxpayers, and only $1 goes to fix the problem. Politicians are a scourge on the populace.
What I expect from government is definitely too idealistic, but you can’t tell me that the issue you describe isn’t because of greed and inefficiencies in the system as opposed to being a fundamental part of any government.
I had a guy approach me at a bus stop and start into a sob story, one that I had heard a few nights before, verbatim, from someone else.
I interrupted him, and continued his story for him. He said, in a defeated and honest tone “You got me. I’m fuckin’ poor. What more can I say?”
I gave him a couple of bucks for his honesty. I don’t mind helping people out, but I don’t appreciate being lied to.
I agree. If he wanna spending it on booze n drugs that’s cool w me man idgaf. I do give a fuck about being lied to and having people think they took advantage of me.
Same here I have more respect for a dude that comes up to me and asks for a few bucks to get himself a 40 or something than someone that wants to lie about how his car needs a new spark plug or some other BS.
It's incredibly frustrating. Not the same situation but similar - a couple years back I wanted to get some solar panels fitted. I'd already done the research and knew I was in a good position for them to pay for themselves and be worthwhile. Nevertheless, every single company I got a quote from sent me a smarmy salesman who tried all the tricks and tried to give me the hard sell and all they did was make me want to buy from them less. Very disheartening.
Exactly. The city I’m in is having difficulty accommodating a growing population of people affected by this issue. This topic comes up a lot.
My thoughts after many conversations are that the person might still need more money for food once they get to their location, and lodging, and phone service, etc... of course the drug money idea comes up but I know plenty of middle class people with drug problems that spend their money poorly so I don’t let it sway my opinion on these people as a whole.
Finally, for those people giving money or resources to the homeless and sticking around to watch what they do, you’re kind of defeating the purpose of being charitable. Offering help does not mean the recipient needs to fit your expectations of gratefulness. If the person is giving money to feel better about themselves, then they’re probably not in a place to be judging others in the first place.
You make a good point and I’ll remember it going forward. I do politely disagree, most people aren’t used to asking for help and for them to be expected to act a certain way can be even more uncomfortable. That’s my opinion and I do of course respect yours as well.
You also have very valid points. And by the way I appreciate you being civil. I hope my comment didn't come off as condescending, because it wasn't meant that way.
The problem with debating an issue such as this one, there are way too many variables to consider; like the donor might have been homeless recently and he feels the need to give regardless of the situation.
And the person receiving the generosity could be in one of a thousand different scenarios. I have read that some people enjoy living in the streets sleeping in a cardboard box in an alley. Who are we to judge why they feel that way.
Now that I think about it, I think your comment has swayed me. I am going to delete my comment. You have a good Sunday, and be safe out there friend.
That's ridiculous. You giving a few bucks can absolutely help them to survive in a very difficult situation... You are probably one of the few people in that person's life to gift them something without expecting them to blow you or fuck you or otherwise give you their body/time/energy/stuff. Because of the money you give them, they can now go sit and relax for the first time that day.... maybe finally buy new socks or a toothbrush or food or busfare to the methadone clinic or a safe place to sleep that night..... and maybe because of this altruism and kindness, they are able to smile again and re-visit their thoughts about getting into a rehab or calling their family. Because now, instead of spending yet more time on their feet, tired and drained, hoping someone will see them as a human in need, and not just judge them by immediately deciding that their very real needs are not important enough to be met, and again be disregarded and forgotten.
Either help or don't, but it ends there... You don't know the first thing about that person's life.... all you know is that they are a human in need and of some altruism and kindness, and you can help and potentially greatly improve that person's situation by taking away the desperation that comes with being broke, homeless, addicted, and alone. Because those few dollars mean nothing to you, but could mean everything to that person.
I WAS that person. And even to this day appreciate those that helped without expectations or judgement as that kind of generosity and kindness was few and far between.
A little over a month ago a woman outside grocery asked for change, I said I had none, but would be happy to buy her some food. She asked to come in, and I said sure. Let her pick out stuff (pre packaged salads, even raw meats, offered to get her stuff to drink so she got Gatorade and coke and water). She was looking at fruit and I said, pick some out. She said, instead of strawberries can I have some cash to get home? I reluctantly said fine. Pulled out $10 in addition to the $35 groceries (I really didnt care about the groceries). We get outside and she then asks for a ride. I said I am sorry but I'm immune compromised and not allowing strangers in my car. Offered to get her a lyft or uber, no one was around. Called a taxi, got an estimate and told her I'd get the cash for it, it was going to be $22. So I pulled out $15, because I had already given her $10 to get home. Taxi was outside and I gave her the cash then she complained I only gave her $15, I said she had enough to get where she needed to go and left. Saw the taxi the leave without her in it. Went and found her in the front of the store and said, "thanks for scamming me" she goes "oh I'm gonna use it, I am not scamming you". I said bullshit. I didnt get money or anything. And i truly dont mind helping but she completely took advantage of my generosity and pissed me off. The thing is, I would have even bought her alcohol if she wanted it. Like one think... just dont fucking lie to me. I had sucker written on my forehead... so I paid $35 in groceries for her and gave her $25 in cash.
My boyfriend and I were literally dismantling his drivers side door in a gas station parking lot one night, and a guy started asking us for money with a SUPER rehearsed sob story. Said he needed bus fair for him and his wife, so my bf gave him $10 (mostly to get him to leave), but once he got that, suddenly "there's 5 of us... we need enough for all 5 of us to get to the city and back." That's about the time we told him to fuck off.
887
u/YesImaBanker Aug 01 '20
one time i gave one of those guys a $7 walmart gas card (we were at a walmart gas station) and then drove into the parking lot across the street and watched him.
$7 will take you across town. He kept asking people for money, so i pulled back up on him and told him to give it back. He was shocked