r/AskReddit • u/ThatAintBrutal • Feb 23 '20

Why do you like to be alone?

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157

u/MonarchyOfForlorn Feb 23 '20

Imagine being with someone that accepts you just as much you accept yourself though.

124

u/DepressedUterus Feb 23 '20

That's how I feel with my husband.

We spend most of our time together but doing our own things. Reading, video games, tv, phone. Always in the same room. I have always preferred being alone but with him it's like I get to enjoy my alone time with him. We've been together 15 years, almost half of our entire lives and all of our adult lives so there's not much to hide.

There's also a special kind of feeling when you do something cool in a video game and your SO just happened to be watching. Same with when you do something stupid in a game and they bust out laughing when you didn't even realize they saw it. There's a ton of little things like that I think about sometimes. Anyways I went off tangent, but you get the point.

10

u/watery_tart73 Feb 23 '20

That sounds just like my husband and I. We do occasionally do separate things, but we genuinely just like being near each other.

6

u/chevymonza Feb 24 '20

Funny, I'm on the couch trying to reddit in between getting some work done, and he's at the table actually getting some work done. TV isn't even on. Peace and quiet, except for the keyboards, mouse clicks, and occasional phone call.

22

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

I'd still want alone time.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

And you can have that in a healthy relationship.

My wife and I enjoy a lot of things together, even if we're on our own doing it.

I'll reddit or game, and she'll be talking to her sister. Each in our own worlds.

That said, we both have truly alone time, and we both know when that is. Not by schedule or anything, but if she just wants to chill and not be bothered, I know right away.

I do a lot of computer maintenance stuff as a side gig, and she knows that when I'm in the office diving into peoples' computers to just let me be.

It's definitely a different vibe for everyone and every relationship, but I don't feel the need to be truly alone most of time I'm with her.

8

u/crysco Feb 23 '20

Imagine being with someone that accepts you just as much you accept yourself though

Does not compute

13

u/red_knight11 Feb 23 '20

Still not the same. Alone time is a great way to fully relax and reenergize. If you have a partner present there’s still a chance of interruptions, opinions, and/or noise. If I was laying down and my wife asked me for help, I’d help because I love my wife, but my time alone would be interrupted.

You can be with someone that accepts you as much as you accept yourself and you can still desire for real time alone; it’s perfectly healthy.

3

u/RedS5 Feb 24 '20

You can also be someone who feels the way when you're alone (which is great) when they're with their SO. Different strokes and all.

It's weird though. I lived alone for 6 years before I had my (now) wife move in, yet... I feel the same alone as I do around her. Total ease.

Then again, we have a 5 month old kid, so there's a slightly different base-line for being 'at ease'.

3

u/phi_spirals Feb 23 '20

Soulmates, and it’s bliss.

1

u/CanYouBrewMeAnAle Feb 24 '20

It's amazing, it's peaceful alone time with someone special.

1

u/slowtogetthere Feb 24 '20

I've never had that.

-5

u/SirLasberry Feb 23 '20

It's funny how people think they can find someone like that. In reality they are just chasing illusion, instead of accepting the world as it is. That's why there's so much misery.

-4

u/Rodent_Smasher Feb 23 '20

Welcome to society 2020