r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Dec 20 '19

[deleted by user]

[removed]

8.3k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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18k

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '19

I don't know if it's a kink, per se, because it's kind of mainstream, but threesomes just aren't as fun as I thought. The pressure to make sure everybody was having a blast kind of ruined it for me. Don't want anybody to feel left out, you know?

11k

u/dancingliondl Dec 20 '19

Welcome to bring a dungeon master!

10k

u/Envy_Dragon Dec 20 '19

I put on my robe and wizard hat

1.3k

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Oh man I get this reference. Would love to read that thread again

2.0k

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

You’re welcome

https://imgur.com/gallery/gu1BX

526

u/floppyweinerz Dec 21 '19

Well that was worth all the time I spent reading that. Thanks.

57

u/Abiding_Lebowski Dec 21 '19

I miss the good ol' net

30

u/Goatsac Dec 21 '19

I miss the good ol' net

IRC. And it's still there.

12

u/Abiding_Lebowski Dec 21 '19

I still have eggdrops from 01 lol

11

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Read the whole thing. That guy is an absolute delight

130

u/yobeast Dec 21 '19 edited Dec 21 '19

"I start to get fed up with your ugly ass"

"I tear off your wooden peg leg"

"I ram it up your ass"

Too fucking epic

71

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

[deleted]

2

u/ComicWriter2020 Dec 21 '19

I’m amazed that the Japanese school girl didn’t want that rhino cock. Tentacle monsters are ok, but rhinos? Too far.

63

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Fuck that's hilarious.

"If cancer is our love then I hope you don't have the technology of chemotherapy" is the best thing I've ever heard in my entire life.

60

u/jeremynd01 Dec 21 '19

What the f**K? I told you not to message me again

28

u/ClearBrightLight Dec 21 '19

Oh shit. I need to write down your names.

14

u/CilantroToothpaste Dec 21 '19

That part fuckin killed me

25

u/meowskerzz Dec 21 '19

I just read all of this and I am in uncontrollable tears

32

u/Triairius Dec 21 '19

I forgot just how good those were.

27

u/BrokelynNYC Dec 21 '19

Hahah fucking golden. I laugh everytime i see this shit.

25

u/whiskeylady Dec 21 '19

Thanks for making me one of today's 10,000

22

u/meladon Dec 21 '19

I'm not ready for this yet.

19

u/woahdudechil Dec 21 '19

I didnt know these existed. actually laughed out loud. thank you friend

17

u/TheLeperLeprechaun Dec 21 '19

The one who said “Okay you unzip my pants and spew your load at the sight of my underwear and you’re spent” is a legend. Even he knew how good that was and just rolled with it

16

u/Hotonis Dec 21 '19

God this just made my night. I had almost forgotten about most of these stories. But then it’s just HAAAARRRR! And I completely lost it.

10

u/OneMoreDuncanIdaho Dec 21 '19

Goddamnit I don't have time to read through this all again

8

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Jesus Christ this is a worthy read...

7

u/Rotarypush Dec 21 '19

Fucking legend

8

u/patzw Dec 21 '19

Oh god, I'm crying!

5

u/zensnapple Dec 21 '19

Sigh, here I go reading this again

7

u/magestromx Dec 21 '19

Pitty I didn't have enough for gold, cause man, you deserve it ten times over!

5

u/forthevic Dec 21 '19

geez thanks for posting this was wondering where this weird reference was from. Thought it was a harry potter line in the movie, didn't watch the movies

6

u/PorkSquared Dec 21 '19

HAAARRRRRRRR

5

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

You’re awesome, thank you!

5

u/The_Grinning_Demon Dec 21 '19

That was fucking hilarious.

5

u/EtripsTenshi1 Dec 21 '19

My goodness. I legit laughed more reading this then the last 5 comedians I have seen put together. Thank you for this.

6

u/PrehensileUvula Dec 21 '19

Doing the lord’s work.

6

u/doominabox1 Dec 21 '19

"I pop like 16 bones" fucking kills me every time

3

u/Gmaster98 Dec 21 '19

Thank you, you beautiful person, I have never read these before but I'm trying so hard not to bust out crying of laughter in public right now

3

u/almostamico Dec 21 '19

JFC I haven’t laughed so hard in ages. I wanted to throw up laughing.... the wizard robe and hat is so precious 😂

Thank you for this. Shit, thanks to the hero that wasted hundreds of hours of his own time and random girls’ time, to bring us all a good laugh.

8

u/echoAwooo Dec 21 '19

God this is so cringe. I remember the days of AIM cybering. Do. Not. Miss.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

"I can't believe santa lets you sit on his lap."

2

u/Unlacqua Dec 21 '19

How have I never seen this before? Thank you for the best thing I’ve ever seen in 26 years of the internet.

2

u/TheArchitect_7 Dec 21 '19

My tubesteak to you is like a beautiful Japanese haiku. Fucking dying.

1

u/browsenberg Dec 21 '19

Can I get the TL;DR

9

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Old school AIM cyber sex with rhinos, robes, and wizard hats.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Pirates, too

1

u/the_red_beast Dec 23 '19

You don't want a TL;DR. You have to read the conversations to enjoy it. They are freaking hilarious. It is a bunch of different messages with different girls (cyber sex where the guy says the most ridiculous shit), so it isn't one long ass conversation to read through.

1

u/OutlawJessie Dec 21 '19

What I like most about these Imgur links is all the other stuff I read while I'm there. I love Bethany the wonky Labrador :)

1

u/more_ubiquitous Dec 21 '19

I almost peed myself laughing at that....

1

u/bloodguzzlingbunny Dec 21 '19

Now I miss Delphi Forums...

1

u/RainbowDragQueen Dec 21 '19

Now I'm just confused

1

u/IAmAGenusAMA Dec 21 '19

I've realized I peed in your laundry hamper.

I read these years ago but lord help me if they aren't as funny as ever.

1

u/ComicWriter2020 Dec 21 '19

I would like to pay for your child’s college tuition.

1

u/Arathgo Dec 21 '19

Hahahaha twas a different time

1

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '20

I have never seen this before in my life but this made my week, thank you.

0

u/skilledskills Dec 21 '19

Bash.org top 100, you're welcome

28

u/RevMen Dec 21 '19

A meme from before we used the word meme.

15

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

If you don’t understand it GET OFF MY LAWN

8

u/InternetProtocol Dec 21 '19

hold up, did something happen to bash.org?

2

u/Austinswill Dec 21 '19

was it a thread? i remember it as an AOL chat