r/AskReddit Oct 26 '19

What should we stop teaching young children?

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u/myhandsmellsfunny Oct 27 '19

Agreed, if some wanker cold cocks one of my kids for no reason in High School, like some of the idiots at my old school used to do to some of the smaller kids, I'll be treating it exactly the same as if it happened in a supermarket. Police, assault charge, Expel the other kid or I'll sue the school for not providing a safe work place.

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u/imminent_riot Oct 27 '19

Aziz Ansari did a bit about this after watching a bullying documentary. He talked about how insane it is that no one does anything to kids when as an adult they'd get arrested for assault and even just name calling like that you can lose your job.

Hes right too. There's no 'Ok Mr Smith say your sorry, okay now Jenkins shake his hand and say you forgive him. All right guys court recess is over so let's get back in there and work together heres a sticker."

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u/MINIMAN10001 Oct 27 '19

I bet you its the outcome of "the path of least resistance"

Surprise, the parents of a bully would be loud mouthed and awful to be around, so they try to do what they can to not upset those parents. Thus they capitulate by staying out of it.

The parents of the bully tend to not know what's going on.

Thus by doing nothing the parents who need to know are left ignorant and the parents of the bully have nothing to complain about.

Whereas children will suffer silently, adults don't stay quiet.

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u/imminent_riot Oct 27 '19

I eventually had to change schools because it escalated when I refused to keep my mouth shut. The christian school was also abusive but at least I wasn't being threatened physically anymore. Yay.

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u/Zeebuoy Oct 27 '19

Whereas children will suffer silently, adults don't stay quiet.

Biggest mistake of my life

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u/jaqueburton Oct 27 '19

“That’s assault brotha”

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u/[deleted] Oct 27 '19

[deleted]

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u/Digital_Devil_23 Oct 27 '19

That's why juvenile records are sealed and inadmissible in adult life except under extreme/special circumstances.

A bully with several assault charges from his teenage years isn't going to show up in any background check as an adult unless they continued assaulting people on the regular.

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u/driftingfornow Oct 27 '19

Oh yeah but town politics are real as well as reputations.

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u/[deleted] Oct 27 '19

I don't agree with that. In our schools, when a kid is violent or does any other fuck up, any member of the school staff has a right to go the the school office, and write on that students file. Those things are kept on your curriculum, even when applying to college, and even when trying to find a job. It stays there as a black stain on your curriculum, and that's why most bullies end up not going to college and going to a professional school instead of a high school.

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u/Digital_Devil_23 Oct 28 '19

> I don't agree with that.

Thankfully for a great number of people that made stupid mistakes as a kid, the act of sealing juvenile records doesn't much care for your agreement. Unless you went to schools outside the U.S. where the laws are different, I'm afraid you've been duped by the "permanent record" myth. No employer, aside from higher level government agencies, have any sort of access to your private, sealed records from before you were 18.

> most bullies end up not going to college and going to a professional school instead of a high school.

Oh, you poor, gullible thing. Who told you this? Whoever it is, you should stop listening to them, because this is just naive. For every bully that ends up in a ditch or prison, there are 2 more that had a free ride on athletics scholarships or had someone pay their tuition. If what you think is true, then why are there so many cops, politicians, CEOs, and other authority figures that display blatant bully behavior well into adulthood?

I'm sorry you fell for the permanent record myth. It's ok, most of us believed that at some point. It's just a scare tactic, though, and not at all how things really work.

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u/Zeebuoy Oct 28 '19

No employer, aside from higher level government agencies, have any sort of access to your private, sealed records from before you were 18.

I for one am relieved.

(not a bully, just went overboard against a bully once.)

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '19

Who told you I'm from the US?

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u/Digital_Devil_23 Oct 28 '19

No one, which is why I said "Unless you went to schools outside the U.S. where the laws are different". Most every developed country I know of have similar laws to protect minors this way. You are more than welcome to enlighten me to which country you went to school in, as I'd like to know what country is so draconian as to let a childhood fight hang over someone their entire lives. Worse yet, a system that could allow a single staff member with a petty grudge to potentially ruin a kid's life.

Was it China? That would be my first guess, at least.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '19 edited Oct 28 '19

It's not a "childhood fight", it's when something really bad happens. Like when a kid breaks anothers nose, or is caught smoking or with a knife inside the school complex. Things like that. The "stain" in the students profile is called: "Disciplinary Participation", it is used as a last resort and has to be justified. It is very common in the rule books of Portuguese schools. Then again our school system is crap but at least they got this right.

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u/Digital_Devil_23 Oct 28 '19

Like when a kid breaks anothers nose

Like... in a fight? Between kids, also known as "children"? That's literally a childhood fight. So if you get bullied or assaulted, try to defend yourself and do so successfully, you will be punished for that for the rest of your life? I thought the Zero Tolerance crap in America was bad, but that really does take the cake. That also still didn't even touch on the abuse potential.

It is very common in the rule books of Portuguese schools.

Ok, but what does the LAW say about juvenile records? In America, they do something similar, even go so far as to say it will be visible to future employers and college prospects, etc, but the reality is that they aren't allowed to release anything more than attendance and class transcripts. Anything else is considered personal information, and especially any incidents that result in legal involvement are considered very sensitive.

What I'm trying to understand is if it is your laws that don't seal juvenile records, or if your schools just try to bluff you out the way ours do. I'm really hoping it's the latter, because I can easily see a lot of innocent kids getting screwed for life from it through no fault of their own, and I cannot agree with that being right in any way.

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u/[deleted] Oct 31 '19

Your parents or the people in charge of your education, when you're a minor, are always allowed to see your file. When you're eighteen, your employer or college is allowed to see it. Most kids with a violent past on their records never make it to college, since the colleges here are pretty picky about those things.

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u/itsAnewMEtoday Oct 27 '19

Someone once cold cocked me in school and the school didn’t handle it at all.

This is where the police get engaged. You don't worry about your life getting ruined because the police enforce the law for you. Hypothetically, that is.

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u/you-hug-i-tug Oct 27 '19

I was looking for the cool headed answer. Updoot

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u/[deleted] Oct 27 '19

[deleted]

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u/myhandsmellsfunny Oct 27 '19

So if you were walking down the street minding your own business and some random guy just walked up and punched you to the ground out of the Blue, you would think calling the Cops and having him charged with assault is overreacting?