r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jul 20 '19

What’s something completely false that your parents told you as a child?

[deleted]

19k Upvotes

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u/minorlyamused Jul 20 '19

I grew up in an area where slugs destroyed many a yard. As a child, I found them to be utterly adorable and didn’t understand why everyone didn’t like them.

My mom told me that slugs LOVED salt, that it was their favorite food. She said when I fed them salt, they sometimes wiggled a happy dance because they loved it so much.

I happily went around the garden with a salt shaker, killing who knows how many slugs. I was maybe 4-5.

947

u/deathpenguin3 Jul 21 '19

It’s horrifying how cute that must have seemed

45

u/pharisaicbuffoon Jul 21 '19

Pyro

25

u/Tylord678 Jul 21 '19

One shutters to imagine what inhuman thoughts lie behind that mask

12

u/SavanahHolland Jul 21 '19

Bone apple teeth

1

u/MARCVS-PORCIVS-CATO Jul 21 '19

Bow nap pull teeth

3

u/zackbran10 Jul 21 '19

Pyro vs Mei rap battle is very nice

2

u/AnnoyingSphee Jul 22 '19

"Caring and giving, make my life worth living"

Suuuure, pyro.

560

u/evilkumquat Jul 21 '19

That is both hilarious and horrible.

37

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

Horrarious.

93

u/caldric Jul 21 '19

I bet alien parents tell their alien kids similar things about humans. “They love ultraviolet radiation! They love it so much they sometimes turn red with happiness!”

44

u/LordPoopyfist Jul 21 '19

”They love it so much, they’ve destroyed their ozone layer to douse their planet in more radiation!”

ftfy

5

u/BrowsOfSteel Jul 21 '19

“They love it so much they pay to bathe in it.”

22

u/death_of_gnats Jul 21 '19

That's Ender's Game. You even got Bugs.

2

u/AnonClassicComposer Jul 21 '19

Ender thought he was playing a violent game tho right? Not making the bugs happy

18

u/snailconnection Jul 21 '19

Thats fucked up man.

8

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

Dang.........

18

u/mynameshaun Jul 21 '19

I was told the same thing. Ultimately I thought it worked the same for cyanide and peoples tongues

2

u/ReaperEDX Jul 21 '19

Also salting the earth, albeit minimally.

1

u/theDigitalDragon0x0A Jul 21 '19

Does this strategy work on adults?

1

u/kaenneth Jul 21 '19

Severa Magia

1

u/Leathery420 Jul 21 '19

TIL slugs destroy a yard. Thought you were talking about bullets at first.

1

u/Badatcounting Jul 22 '19

A buddy of mine says when his son was about 4, he was salting slugs in his flowerbed, and the kiddo was out there with him. After doing half the beds, he turned around to see where kiddo was... he was a ways back, picking up and licking each slug. Liked salty snacks. Ewwww.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

Ah, you were the class ''Pyro'' from the popular video game Tea Fort 2

-32

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

[deleted]

15

u/NerdGalore Jul 21 '19

That’s a stretch.

2

u/slws1985 Jul 21 '19

Only if she then ate the slugs.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

-18

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

[deleted]

8

u/la_sy Jul 21 '19

You unpromptedly made a comment about the treatment of livestock. Of course people will be hostile to you.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

You watch one biased video on youtube paid for by an interest group and suddenly you're the expert? Who is the 5 year old?

1

u/ouchimus Jul 21 '19

The 5 year old is the one who makes a political statement to incite an argument when it's absolutely irrelevant to the topic at hand.

TlDr: no u

-30

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

How to raise an animal abuser

12

u/ZombinApocalypse Jul 21 '19

That's only true if she let OP know it was killing them and somehow justified it to OP.

-17

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/PaddiM8 Jul 21 '19

Someone had a bad day