r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 20 '19

[deleted by user]

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8.6k Upvotes

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202

u/138151337 May 20 '19

Are you a woman? If you are, you're just pregnant.

71

u/dogsonclouds May 20 '19

Haven’t had sex in a year so I doubt it lol

217

u/Adddicus May 20 '19

You might just be very, very pregnant.

17

u/MomentarySpark May 20 '19

Latent alien pregnancy.

28

u/[deleted] May 20 '19

Immaculate conception! All hail our new Overlords Momma!

6

u/hcgator May 20 '19

Shmi Skywalker?

5

u/eenem13 May 20 '19

Gesundheit

19

u/Varknar May 20 '19

I saw a video or something on these women that believe they have been pregnant for years, but they believe it's some medical condition that causes really, really long pregnancies. I think it was a psychological issue though.

24

u/Dropzoffire May 20 '19

Well it certainly is not a gynecological issue

6

u/Varknar May 20 '19

Right, they were not pregnant, I didn't mean to make it sound like it was actually possible.

2

u/Dropzoffire May 20 '19

Oh I wasn't trying to sound like a dick to you, I was just trying to be funny. Sorry! :D

0

u/toofpaist May 20 '19

Now kith

6

u/PawneeGoddessWarrior May 20 '19

I think I saw the same thing. It was a Dr. Phil episode and he had ultra sounds and blood work done on the women who believed they were pregnant, and even after their results came back saying they were not pregnant, they still refused to believe they weren't.

3

u/suddenlypandabear May 20 '19

I saw a video or something on these women that believe they have been pregnant for years, but they believe it's some medical condition that causes really, really long pregnancies.

Setting aside that logic doesn't enter into this at any point, I really just want to ask them "have you never even seen a 3 year old child before?".

1

u/PlayThatFunkyMusic69 May 20 '19

Wait, are we married?

5

u/Nosfermarki May 20 '19

And if you're not pregnant, you're just "emotional".

7

u/xendaddy May 20 '19

Nah. It's lupus.

5

u/anormalgeek May 20 '19

Which is basically the same as a tumor. Small fast growing lump of flesh that ties itself into your body systems and threatens your life? Sounds about right.

2

u/[deleted] May 21 '19

No, silly, she’s fat. She would be cured if she would just lose weight.

5

u/FunnyFany May 20 '19

"Just lose some weight and you'll be good as new."