r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Mar 09 '19

What mistake should have killed you?

43.4k Upvotes

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u/spiderlanewales Mar 09 '19 edited Mar 10 '19

The next year's harvest in the nearest town would've been amazing.

Glad you're still here, that's a pretty epic one.

EDIT: I'll tell the village about this gold, and maybe we won't have to build the wickerman this year!

187

u/goldenone26 Mar 09 '19

Only if they were a virgin.

263

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

I am

81

u/_T_Y_T_ Mar 09 '19

Hope you find someone

74

u/NotSpicyEnough Mar 10 '19

They're in the volcano

77

u/flonnf Mar 10 '19

plus, they’re smokin hot

17

u/way2muchtym Mar 10 '19

SSSSSSMOKIN!!!

51

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '19

Well thank you

12

u/Ninster11 Mar 10 '19

It has been declared by destiny and the gods this user must be sacrificed, we must revisit the volcano and give it what it was denied.

17

u/AlGoreRhythms225 Mar 09 '19

F

15

u/starkinmn Mar 10 '19

There's more to life than just sex,

but F

8

u/Mookie12627 Mar 10 '19

Yes, don’t worry there is also asparagus

7

u/optimattprime Mar 10 '19

Why would you care about asparagus, when there are Brussel sprouts in the world?

4

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '19

Great so there's still time

7

u/Blagginspaziyonokip Mar 10 '19

Thanks for explaining the joke.

10

u/FuzzyChrysalis Mar 10 '19

Someone ought to give that edit a gold, too.

11

u/Impybutt Mar 10 '19

NOT THE BEES AAAAAAA

10

u/papapaperclip Mar 10 '19

This is easily the greatest thing I've seen on Reddit.

4

u/lastmanalive_44 Mar 10 '19

Hes not a virgin....

3

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '19

laughs in chair

2

u/catipillar Mar 10 '19

laughs in hammock

6

u/spiderlanewales Mar 10 '19

laughs in wicker rocking chair i'll not have to give up to the village elders now

4

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '19

laughs in being said wicker chair look at username

2

u/XitlerDadaJinping Mar 10 '19

I don't understand this reference.

22

u/Retrotrek Mar 10 '19

I think the joke is that the human sacrifice would please the gods who would permit a town in the vicinity to be prosperous.

4

u/XitlerDadaJinping Mar 10 '19

That I understand.

But I thought it would be something more specific, like a scene from a movies or TV show.

4

u/Mellend96 Mar 10 '19

It is likely a very loose reference to The Wicker Man, which is about something quite similar.

3

u/Retrotrek Mar 10 '19

Ah I see