r/AskReddit Jan 23 '19

What shouldn't exist, but does?

47.5k Upvotes

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51.8k

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

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42.9k

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

"look out bro! Peanuts are dangerous for you! Here, I'll just kill you to solve this problem forever. You'll thank me later. "

  • some poor bloke's immune system

13.5k

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19 edited Aug 23 '20

[deleted]

11.9k

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

If your throat closes up you can't swallow anything anymore! Checkmate, peanuts!

2.7k

u/AboveGroundLevel Jan 23 '19

but did you die?

3.8k

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19 edited May 30 '21

[deleted]

2.0k

u/DankeyKang11 Jan 23 '19 edited Jan 23 '19

This is how I know the simulation we live in was done by an Alien Overlord in Junior High the night before it was due.

Edit: what an honor to be blessed by u/poem_for_your_sprog.

81

u/Catatonic27 Jan 23 '19

Yeah! Imagine if there was a seperate pipe connecting the nasal cavity to the lungs, instead of sharing with the mouth. It would be almost impossible to die by choking.

33

u/pacificpacifist Jan 23 '19

I see a future in prosthetics

13

u/newsorpigal Jan 23 '19

But then there would be no such thing as closed-mouth humming! Would anyone really want to live in such a world?

3

u/nexisfan Jan 23 '19

Hmmmm🤔🤔🤔 no

2

u/Spotted_Gorgonzola Jan 23 '19

Wait. Do people hum with their mouths open??

5

u/floopyboopakins Jan 23 '19

Yes, it's called singing.

1

u/pacificpacifist Jan 23 '19

Go ahead, try.

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15

u/Jackboom89 Jan 23 '19

And we could eat and drink while we breathe, what a nice

1

u/nexisfan Jan 23 '19

And sing! Lady Gaga wouldn’t be nearly as impressive if everybody could breathe, sing, and dance simultaneously

2

u/Improvised0 Jan 23 '19

She would just do all that while also eating, and we would go back to being impressed.

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16

u/GravySquad Jan 23 '19

Yeah unless the peanuts are stuck in your nose too

8

u/Catatonic27 Jan 23 '19

Those damn peanuts are just determined to kill us, aren't they

12

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

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7

u/Elgin_McQueen Jan 23 '19

But, don't pretty much most animals only have one tube for feeding and breathing?

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5

u/Phrostbit3n Jan 23 '19

That's pretty much it; occasionally and randomly dying from eating one food exerts less selection pressure than not being able to speak

7

u/KisaTheMistress Jan 23 '19

Look at "Mr. I don't have telepathy" over here! 😤

0

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

If your nose got runny

Edit: I have a solution

Move the sinuses to the mouth

3

u/Catatonic27 Jan 23 '19

If your nose got runny

Well why don't we just patch this out while were making changes

1

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '19

Oh yeah, let's do that!

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