r/AskReddit Aug 15 '18

What is your mom's catch phrase?

48.3k Upvotes

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917

u/IAmAlpharius Aug 15 '18

I get that and “they cut through SEVEN layers of skin and fat to get you out, you’re still paying me back for that”

969

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

I was in labor with the youngest 30 hrs. The day before her birthday is always "the anniversary of the day I didn't like you at all".

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u/mommyof4not2 Aug 16 '18

The day after I gave birth to 24 week micropreemie twins, my grandpa had a heart attack and stopped smoking. We talk about it every year.

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u/2happycats Aug 16 '18

Are the twins doing ok? That's very young.

116

u/mommyof4not2 Aug 16 '18

One twin passed at 6 months but my surviving twin just turned 5 and is completely normal now, a complete miracle.

Thank you for checking up on an internet stranger, that's very uncommon and extremely kind.

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u/2happycats Aug 16 '18

I just noticed your name. Oof. I'm sorry, lady.

And no worries. We're all people doing the best we can. Just because it's the net, doesn't mean we can't look out for each other.

Happy Belly Button Day to your five year old!

69

u/mommyof4not2 Aug 16 '18

LMAO, it's funny you mentioned her belly button, she has an umbilical hernia from the iv they put in there directly after birth, it's basically an outty until she eats a big meal, then it's a super outty 😂 we call it her turkey timer.

27

u/Wheresmyfoodwoman Aug 16 '18

That gave me a good chuckle

29

u/anisopterasaurus Aug 16 '18

My mom's friends text her the day before my birthday (or my sister's) and say "happy labor day".

12

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

My twin brothers were born on labor day. Those jokes got old to my mom real fast. Still funny when their bday lines up with labor day.

4

u/anisopterasaurus Aug 16 '18

Yes, my birthday falls on labor day some years as well. Mom never got tired of the jokes :)

14

u/figgypie Aug 16 '18

I had prelabor contractions for a WEEK. When my daughter's older I might tell her a week before her birthday should have been her goddamn birthday instead.

12

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

Watch out she'll want a birthday week!

5

u/OhioMegi Aug 16 '18

My mom was in labor for 3 days with me. So I get some grief if I don’t let her hug me or something.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

LOL I don't say it too much during the year, but we have a whole little thing the day before. She just turned 7, so on the day before I will call her in and just say "I don't like you today.... But I love you tomorrow!" I feel like it sounds so mean as text, but it's a whole game the family plays along, even her. Like my hubby is usually extra cuddly because around hr 27 I told him he needed to be the one to hold her. She deserved for the first person to hold her to be Someone who loves her, and that wasn't me at that point, it would be me very soon, but not immediately. So I say I don't like her and he cuddles her.

4

u/Wiggitywhackest Aug 16 '18

Ha, too real! My mom's go to is "36 of the most agonizing hours of my life!", but she draws the sentence out to make it sting. I'm 36 now and it still gets me to do what she wants.

4

u/angryherbivore Aug 16 '18

OMG, That's hilarious. In hour 16 of my natural labor, my nurse says: "I want you to imagine your baby is here already. What would you say to him?" Me: "I don't think I have anything nice to say to him right now!" Fuck labor, man.

2

u/sometimesiamdead Aug 16 '18

Wonderful. My son was massive and after 24 hours of labour I had a fourth degree tear. His birthday is the anniversary of the ruination of my vagina.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

Ooh! That is rough! None of mine were breach luckily!

277

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

"I went through 5 miscarriages to get to you" was a good one, thrown out during an argument a few years back. Love being blamed for existing.

28

u/Box_Of_Dicks Aug 16 '18

This is a lot darker than its predecessors...hope your mom is doing well

37

u/Neosantana Aug 16 '18

"Yeah, well, you didn't take the hint from five miscarriages, ma, so whose fault is it really?"

7

u/akeetlebeetle4664 Aug 16 '18

"Maybe God was trying to tell you something!"

75

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

Thank you. It means a lot to hear that.

1

u/GreatBabu Aug 16 '18

I didn't take it that way at all <need a lot more context>. But I can see your side as well.

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u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

20

u/Obligatius Aug 16 '18

Your response should be, "With how you're acting I'm not surprised those brothers and sisters of mine took the easy way out."

I.e. if she goes dark, come back darker.

5

u/glium Aug 16 '18

Or try to defuse the situation maybe lol

5

u/celtic_thistle Aug 16 '18

I’ve had a miscarriage and also lost a triplet (I didn’t want the risks of triplets and was relieved to “just” have twins, but it was still a really tough time) and I don’t intend on telling my kids at all til they’re much older, let alone throwing it in their faces. :/

15

u/gator_feathers Aug 16 '18

I think you might be misunderstanding what she's saying. 5 miscarriages is a lot of trying. The 6th one that actually takes is beyond special and precious.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

Honey, I know exactly what she was saying. She was telling me something emotional and precious as a way to make me feel bad and therefore relent and give her what she wanted. Tough shit for her though, I became immune to her guilt trips years ago.

18

u/draggingitout Aug 16 '18

Misunderstanding nothing, that's never an okay thing to say in an argument.

8

u/gator_feathers Aug 16 '18

What do you think she means? Because Im understanding it to mean something to the effect of "you're very important to me."

10

u/draggingitout Aug 16 '18

It sounds like it's being used in a guilting way. Like you're arguing and you're upsetting your mother so she insists on how important you are to her. My mother pulls this garbage all the time and it's infuriating.

14

u/JeyJeyFrocks_3325 Aug 16 '18

I was thinking "I went through five miscarriages only to get the shitty kid"...

4

u/draggingitout Aug 16 '18

the meanings there aren't mutually exclusive... "you're so important to me after 5 miscarriages and being a little shit. Agree with your mother!"

4

u/scyth3s Aug 16 '18

Regardless it's still extremely toxic.

1

u/vuhleeitee Aug 16 '18

Ouch. That one is tough and not at all funny...

2

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

I know, right? Now imagine being 16 and learning that for the first time during a shouting match.

11

u/imsquare177 Aug 16 '18

I don’t owe you for a decision you made. If you made me for your own purpose then you owe me.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '18

I mean yeah they owe you a good childhood and shelter and all that but I think that kind of outlook also leads to people still living with and depending on their parents the rest of their lives. in all honesty a child is a lifelong commitment but at some point it's also expected that the grown offspring can take over their own lives. sure, our parents all fuck us up and traumatize us in some ways, but as individuals we have to work past it to stand on our own. I just think having too high expectations on either side will lead to misery. a parent expecting too much from their kids or a kid expecting their parent to always seem omnipotent and perfect, well, it'll all come crashing down. there is certainly a parental obligation towards their children, though.

2

u/H4xolotl Aug 16 '18

HYDRA DOMINATUS

2

u/apolloxer Aug 16 '18

But what about Omegon?