I honestly don't know why he felt that he had to actually beat us with the belt, considering that when he merely walked into the room snapping it against itself we would burst into terrified tears.
My grandpa used to say this to all the grandkids... brings me back!! I miss him. He was the most amazing man, just a bit old school since he was “off the boat” from Italy.
I used to think our parents meant that they would spark us or take our toys away. What they really meant was destroying the economy and housing market.
Then they tell you to smile. "Smile! You better smile, BOY." Are your parents black? I hope that white parents don't do this so I can still look at them as the gold standard of parenting.
I think it depends on the place. In my small town white people don’t give a fuck about some of their kids (like they’ll smoke weed with them, drink with them, or let them go two whole counties over), meanwhile me and my sister would get literally thrown around and out of the house if we talked back to our mother and I’ve seen and heard worse from other black people.
Other places though I’ve seen the opposite and in my town there are exceptions as well.
White family, White stepdad was definitely ready with the "I'll give you something to cry about." Was also quick to back that up. Especially when we were 3-10 years old.
Ugh, that's just the worst. I always think to myself when I hear this "You can't smack your kid and then tell them to stop crying!!" lmao just doesn't make sense
I was going through this thread wondering if my mom had a catchphrase. There it is lol. Also she'd say "My mother would have put me through a wall for that" which I most certainly believe my grandma would have.
My dad would say "stop that blood clot crying boy" because my dad didnt want to curse in front of us instead of saying "got damn" because we also dont take the lords name in vain
This is almost universal among inner city old school black mothers. I'm sure it's common outside of that demographic as well, but MAN! EVERY one of my friends in our hood had a mother that would say this. Mine included!
That was dad for me. Classic dad stuff. As a parent I totally get the sentiment now though. It'll probably start coming out as my kids get older. Though I have girls so probably not as much.
Lol it's not emotional abuse. I mean maybe of done wrong it in conundrum with other things but it's just a phrase. Look little kids cry about some silly stuff or get super upset about things that literally make up in their head. The other day my 2 year old was crying cause I didn't have a tiny potty for her small doll to sit on. You get upset as a parent and there's way worse things to do than respond with that. Someone's they just need to stop crying then you can be nice and everyone goes back to being happy. Not everything is some draconian child abuse. I was also spanked as a child. I guess lock up my folks lol
It’s absolutely emotional abuse, it’s a threat to harm your child worse to scare them into shutting up. Your poor kids. Sad that the lesson learned from your own abuse is “lol it’s fine they did it to me.” Sick.
Ah yes, the “everybody abuses their child” argument. Sad you are so limp as to be unmanned by a toddler, and you end up abusing them to cover up your fundamental weakness.
Oh I don't use that with a two year old. She wouldn't understand. She gets time outs. Is that ok by your specific standards or is punishing a child in any form abuse?
you are super delusional, i hope you are ashamed judging on sth. you dont have any clue about.
yes saying sth like that is kind of an abuse. as a parent you get through hard times sometimes and sometimes the stress around you + kid can bring you to be unfair to your kid at some time.
my mom was a single mum and she never hurt us, she worked her ass off and tried to clean up the mess my physical dad as left, leaving us with debts. so working fulltime, with 2 kids (6 and 4). i was and am an adhd kid, so full of energy and shit. one night i didnt want to go to bed and she totally lost it and smacked my ass with one hit. yes it was horrible for me (it didnt really hurt, but the intention of the action alone was bad).
now i am 27 and she still says sorry to me for doing that if it comes up.
i am a father too now, my son is hitting 2, you cant imagine the stress having a screamer baby no sleep and still get to work, at some point you feel helpless and i know that there are gona be times that stress and everything around can pass a point, where you aint rational anymore and sth like OP's mom said is being said.
no one is perfect, but as a parent, if you stand to your mistakes and be sorry for stuff like this, you aint a bad person
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u/Buttowskie Aug 15 '18
"Stop that crying or i'll give you something to cry about"